Fear of Failure

[Kanye69]

all right, so one of my biggest fears is not being successful enough. I graduated high school with my associates degree, and now I'm going into my second year at university (since highschool) with senior credits. I'm also starting to take PhD level coursework. however, I still have this fear that I won't be successful, or that i might crack under the pressure and not reach the level of success I'd like to. research mathematics mathematics is really elitist and extremely difficult, so I'd like to get into a very good grad school. but what if I don't? aghhhh senpai help. I'm ranting. Do any of you guys have any advice for me or any experience in something similar? thanks fam.

-Kanye69

 

[Frosty]

all right, so one of my biggest fears is not being successful enough. I graduated high school with my associates degree, and now I'm going into my second year at university (since highschool) with senior credits. I'm also starting to take PhD level coursework. however, I still have this fear that I won't be successful, or that i might crack under the pressure and not reach the level of success I'd like to. research mathematics mathematics is really elitist and extremely difficult, so I'd like to get into a very good grad school. but what if I don't? aghhhh senpai help. I'm ranting. Do any of you guys have any advice for me or any experience in something similar? thanks fam.

-Kanye69

Ok call me kind of an ass- not trying to be... but Im confused.

How exactly do you graduate highschool with a college degree? Did you take a million college courses in high school? Or maybe you are in a different country?

And if you are taking PHD level coursework in your second year of college... well thats pretty impressive considering it takes about twice as long to get a PHD as it does to get a masters. So the fact that you are already in like... fifth year classes when having only completed one year of school and are still usually right in the middle of their gen eds... pretty impressive.

It seems considering all this... you are more than on the right track. If you are having issues with anxiety see a counselor, but considering all this I dont think you need to be worried about not being on target. But... I guess what do I know really

 

[Kanye69]

I took a lot of college classes in highschool. And nah, I'm from the US. It's less of an issue if anxiety than it is an issue of comparing myself to the most successful people, I think. I also think about how I could have made better choices in the past. Idk. Thank you for your kind words though :33
-Kanye69

 

[Forever]

What is 0/0?
-Forever

 

[Litvyak]

all right, so one of my biggest fears is not being successful enough. I graduated high school with my associates degree, and now I'm going into my second year at university (since highschool) with senior credits. I'm also starting to take PhD level coursework. however, I still have this fear that I won't be successful, or that i might crack under the pressure and not reach the level of success I'd like to. research mathematics mathematics is really elitist and extremely difficult, so I'd like to get into a very good grad school. but what if I don't? aghhhh senpai help. I'm ranting. Do any of you guys have any advice for me or any experience in something similar? thanks fam.

What I've learned from my doctoral studies is not to overestimate the academic point of view. It's an industry, which is fine, but most people who achieve excellence have a certain healthy disregard for establised rules without becoming entirely cynical. If you decide for a career in academia, try not to think as if it were the only world that matters. The criteria they use to determine success is better than nothing, but they're often flawed and anachronistic. I guess what I mean is: try to be an outsider among insiders and do not conform to peer pressure, try to look at the grand scheme of things without alienating yourself from your colleagues. This obviously requires a certain level of independence and social skills.

Getting into a very good grad school is great, but if you don't succeed, you still have options - it's not the end of the world. Listen carefully to job rumors and caveats, but try not to be disheartened by them, some simply try to deter you to decrease competition, and some don't try hard enough and act all surprised if they don't succeed. Self-determination, bravery and inventiveness always finds a way.

 

[Litvyak]

One more thing: mobility is key. Keep in mind that even if you have trouble with your supervisor / grad programme / coursework etc. and get fed up with the whole thing, you'll very likely find a tenure-track position outside the US, assuming you're American. Europe, for example, will welcome you with open arms. The idea that you have options will likely decrease your stress level and allow you to produce quality papers.

 

[Red Memories]

Ok call me kind of an ass- not trying to be... but Im confused.

How exactly do you graduate highschool with a college degree? Did you take a million college courses in high school? Or maybe you are in a different country?

And if you are taking PHD level coursework in your second year of college... well thats pretty impressive considering it takes about twice as long to get a PHD as it does to get a masters. So the fact that you are already in like... fifth year classes when having only completed one year of school and are still usually right in the middle of their gen eds... pretty impressive.

It seems considering all this... you are more than on the right track. If you are having issues with anxiety see a counselor, but considering all this I dont think you need to be worried about not being on target. But... I guess what do I know really

there are some high school programs that have this concurrent credit thing, I forget what she told me it was called, because when I did my big research paper I interviewed a student who discussed it - but basically their junior and senior years are also filled with college credits so by the time they leave HS, they have an associates degree.

 

[Red Memories]

One of the biggest things that help me with my fear of failure is rationalization.

1. Look at the thought
2. Where did it come from?
3. Find every way you can to disprove the thought.
4. Do not do a ton of forward thinking. Living in the present in these cases is important. If you start building up too much of the future mentally, a change will be so much harder.

 

[Kanye69]

One more thing: mobility is key. Keep in mind that even if you have trouble with your supervisor / grad programme / coursework etc. and get fed up with the whole thing, you'll very likely find a tenure-track position outside the US, assuming you're American. Europe, for example, will welcome you with open arms. The idea that you have options will likely decrease your stress level and allow you to produce quality papers.

Thank you for all your advice. May I ask what you study/studied in graduate school? Also, on the idea of studying abroad (yes, I'm American), have you found that admissions for good programs outside of the US are less competitive than those inside? As you know, in the US it is practically as competitive as it can be. I'm interested in studying abroad anyways. However, from what I've seen, it looks like international schools expect you to have a research proposal and know exactly what you want to study when you apply for a PhD program. In the US there's more of an attitude along these lines: "It's nice if you have an idea of what you'd like to study, but you'll probably change your mind to some degree. Hence we're not too worried about that. Just come, study, and meet some professors. You'll figure that part out later." And at this point, I don't know what I'd like to research; I have only a few ideas. But, then again, I have about a year and a half until I start applying
-Kanye69

 

[Kanye69]

One of the biggest things that help me with my fear of failure is rationalization. 1. Look at the thought 2. Where did it come from? 3. Find every way you can to disprove the thought. 4. Do not do a ton of forward thinking. Living in the present in these cases is important. If you start building up too much of the future mentally, a change will be so much harder.

Thanks for your advice Crystal. One of my problems is that I tend to look to far ahead. I hate planning too far ahead - except when it comes to school. I like to plan and know exactly what classes I'm going to take, and when I'm going to take them. So far that's helped me get ahead of others. But it has also put some additional stress on me. I do keep myself flexible enough to adapt to changes, though

The thought came from a desire to succeed and be remembered in my field of expertise. I don't want to waste my potential
-Kanye69

 

[Litvyak]

Thank you for all your advice. May I ask what you study/studied in graduate school?

I have an MSc in Econ, I'm in the second year of a PhD in Philosophy. I used to study at Warwick in the UK, I'm now enrolled at a doctoral programme in Germany.

Also, on the idea of studying abroad (yes, I'm American), have you found that admissions for good programs outside of the US are less competitive than those inside?

Not necessarily, but universities in Europe are very welcoming of international students, they're usually curious about their talents and perspectives. If you have a strong degree + some strong letters of recommendation from an American university, you're good to go.

I'm interested in studying abroad anyways. However, from what I've seen, it looks like international schools expect you to have a research proposal and know exactly what you want to study when you apply for a PhD program. In the US there's more of an attitude along these lines: "It's nice if you have an idea of what you'd like to study, but you'll probably change your mind to some degree. Hence we're not too worried about that. Just come, study, and meet some professors. You'll figure that part out later." And at this point, I don't know what I'd like to research; I have only a few ideas. But, then again, I have about a year and a half until I start applying

This is correct, European boards will ask for a relatively detailed research proposal - but you seem to have plenty of time to come up with something. You don't have to stick to your proposal though, you could, in theory, come up with a different project immediately after admission. This, of course, depends on whether you're part of a research team with a narrow focus; if so, it might be more difficult to do a 180 degree turn.

The point is: don't be too enamoured with the academic perspective, academia is full of flawed and insecure people with some diamonds in the rough. You can, however, establish a foothold in higher education if you so wish. Try to be as independent as possible, do what you love, and it'll work out.