Homophobic ENTJ at work. How do I deal with it?

[Mal12345]

[MENTION=13589]Mal+[/MENTION]

I don't want it to become an argument, butt...
It's just that the way you talked, I sounded like a complete idiot. And, no I've never contradicted myself, I just didn't add some details. The manager desk is very next to the desk where the ENTJ guy used to be. I've said to the manager that that wasn't the first time such things happend and I was full of it so the guy would listen. Second, I've said that the ENTJ guy ws involved with gangs, and then I said he's studying to be an airplane pilot. Sounds conflicting, right, because he's rich and in a gang, but he was/is involved with SOCCER ORGANIZED GANGS common here in Brazil, and they attract high middle-class young males who have an affinity with violence and need an excuse to beat/kill people so they join these types of groups that have a fake serious motive behind them.
Third, I've posted this post 3 months ago and I've been updating in between them. I had posted before that I had cut contact with him shortly after those incidents and the thread became more of a reflection of corporate discrimination incidents. Those who posted later, including you, must have read only the first post and thought I was still having trouble with him, so you make these assumptions
The last: Lark, don't generalize it to all ENTJs (I see you're one and it sounds like you've put yourself in his position). I know some wonderful ENTJ people out there who even fight for the weak people and have kind of a hero complex about them, which I admire. But, frankly, you seem to me not very friendly towards gay people, am I wrong? I didn't want people to hate the ENTJ guy, anyone nor I were being "phobic" to him, people who posted will never even see him in their lives, they were phobic of his actions. Just read the title, I was asking how should I deal with it all.
And, [MENTION=13589]Mal+[/MENTION] , still about typology, I'm an infp and sometimes I sound dramatic even about serious things because it's the way, ummm, I'm wired? All the infps out there know how it impacts our actions when we should do something about some events and we second guess ourselves because of fear of the situation being just drama, when they aren't drama, and it takes a while for us to see it.
I really appreciate all the replies, you people are really empathetic and helpful.

I didn't say you contradicted yourself. But what I'm saying now is that you've been trolling for sympathy.

 

[Joehobo]

I don't know how you guys draw the conclusion that this was a troll thread, maybe you've seen things of the likes but idk.

Anyway, glad to hear the situation is now resolved.

 

[braziljoe]

[MENTION=13589]Mal+[/MENTION]

And you are trying to play the one who sees things clearer than everyone else. Classic INTP overanalysis and "brutal honesty", but they always fail to look at their own faults.

 

[Mal12345]

[MENTION=13589]Mal+[/MENTION]

And you are trying to play the one who sees things clearer than everyone else. Classic INTP overanalysis and "brutal honesty", but they always fail to look at their own faults.

I looked at the evidence you presented. I gave the diagnosis and treatment based on that evidence. Now that you've changed the evidence, my diagnosis has changed. But you don't want to know about the treatment I recommend. Really, you don't.

 

[kyuuei]

Honestly, I don't know why you ever put up with it in the first place. ENTJ will easily lose his job through HR personnel if a proper report is made over a course of time. You have witnesses to his obvious threats, and a hostile environment in the work place is NOT tolerated anywhere--military, civilian, anywhere. It is a part of sexual harrassment and that has a zero tolerance policy.. especially with economies the way they are now-a-days, holding onto your job means more than it used to. The manager downplaying the situation is in the wrong as well--I'd kindly advise him to handle the situation and move the guy away from you asap unless he wants to be involved in the report as well.

How anyone read that passage and thought it was somehow professional and appropriate to speak like that in the work place is absurd. I'm a fan of brutal honesty.. I think that ENTJ has every right to think homosexuality is disgusting. He, however, does not have the right to create a hostile environment in the work place.

 

[Elfboy]

Honestly, I don't know why you ever put up with it in the first place. ENTJ will easily lose his job through HR personnel if a proper report is made over a course of time. You have witnesses to his obvious threats, and a hostile environment in the work place is NOT tolerated anywhere--military, civilian, anywhere. It is a part of sexual harrassment and that has a zero tolerance policy.. especially with economies the way they are now-a-days, holding onto your job means more than it used to. The manager downplaying the situation is in the wrong as well--I'd kindly advise him to handle the situation and move the guy away from you asap unless he wants to be involved in the report as well.

How anyone read that passage and thought it was somehow professional and appropriate to speak like that in the work place is absurd. I'm a fan of brutal honesty.. I think that ENTJ has every right to think homosexuality is disgusting. He, however, does not have the right to create a hostile environment in the work place.

+1

 

[EntangledLight]

i don't see a contradiction in the OP's post (i see more information/clarification happening, but nothing that comes in and undoes what came before it).

i'm also missing the points he made that point towards "trolling for sympathy". sounds like projection if ya ask me .

i mean... i can see how one could view that as one potential possibility, but as to why they'd go ahead and exclude all other possibilities... where's the reasoning for that? (hence projection--no actual reason to adhere to one conclusion so strongly when others are just as likely... maybe this is projection?! who knows? maybe someone can show me what i'm missing and not taking into account )

anyhow, glad it worked out for you. this guy seems like "wanna be tough guy". the one's who are actually bad news will either: not show any signs that they're mad--they'll just calmly wait for a moment to hurt you, or, their implied threats are quickly followed through and no amount of "but you'll get in trouble!" will register on their minds like it does for normal people.

 

[Coriolis]

I think this is a troll thread, think about it, its someone posting about a phobic reaction to someone who is homophobic.

I didn't have the impression that the ENTJ in question was homophobic. He didn't seem to be afraid of Braziljoe at all, but instead tried to intimidate him. That just makes the ENTJ a bigot, and a jerk.