I'm terrified.

[Haphazard]

What about other signs of depression -- anhedonia (loss of pleasure), disturbed sleep, changes in appetite?

Eating seems kind of pointless, but that may be the food options rather than loss of appetitie. Also, massive weight gain in about the past week or two. I think. I don't have a scale.

 

[phoenix13]

Eating seems kind of pointless, but that may be the food options rather than loss of appetitie. Also, massive weight gain in about the past week or two. I think. I don't have a scale.

It's the change in weight that matters. Up to 40% of depression is "atypical depression" which features weight gain, and in particular a craving for carbohydrates. You seem to be having a lot of worrisome symptoms. Again, a physician or cognitive therapist will be able to help you determine whether or not you're suffering from clinical depression.

 

[mochajava]

I agree -- what does your university have? I think some in-person help (rather than just us here on the forum) would be worth a shot. How does that sound? Doable? Terrifying? Somewhere in between?

 

[Haphazard]

Probably there is a reason for this, because my college-educated family often works 15 hours a day in dead-end exhausting jobs and that is all that is in my future.

 

[Oeufa]

Stop focusing on your perceived family failures. Their lives are NOT yours. Just because your bro ended up in Walmart rather than something related to his course doesn't mean you will. People have said very encouraging, helpful things to you here yet you ignore them and refuse to budge from your utterly pessimistic standpoint. Frustrating.

 

[Amethyst]

Stop focusing on your perceived family failures. Their lives are NOT yours.

Agreed. Look at it from another standpoint, like I do. Yeah, my family hasn't done much, but I'm going to be the one who stands out from them and make it to whatever dreams I wish to pursue (once I decide on one of them). That's the beauty of being your own person, because for the most part, what other people do with their lives doesn't decide what you do with yours. You and everyone else here have that special ability to make your own decisions in life and choose how hard you want to work at something and what you've learned from it so you can better yourself in the end. Fix yourself from the inside, first, then worry about other people's problems if you need to.

Plus I'd also recommend calling a doc and hit the prozac. You never know what good it will do if you never try it.

 

[mrcockburn]

I fell asleep about eight times today and I'm still tired, and I haven't even done anything...

I mean my entire life is chill out time and still I'm like this. I have absolutely zero chance of surviving in the real world. Walmart will kill me and suck the marrow from my bones.

Have you seen a doctor about this? Get checked for depression or autoimmune disease. Extreme fatigue might indicate lupus or chronic fatigue syndrome.

 

[Haphazard]

7 minutes of exercise.

I may still be incredibly weak and am somehow exhausted by this, but at least I do not feel the urge to break any windows.

 

[nonsequitur]

7 minutes of exercise.

I may still be incredibly weak and am somehow exhausted by this, but at least I do not feel the urge to break any windows.

Sounds like depression to me. The sense of futility, the anger, the perpetual fatigue and irritation at the world all sound familiar.

On meds, I still don't do exercise but I can get out of bed and work, and my sleep gets more regular. That makes things a bit better.

 

[Haphazard]

I can somehow manage seven minutes. Really, it's fucking incredible that I can even do that, considering how fat and disgusting I am.

I haven't done it since though. I probably should but I've been having too many teeth yanking nightmares and have been to tired to even focus on studying.