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This can't go on! Sibling having problems in school

lowtech redneck

New member
Joined
Aug 26, 2007
Messages
3,711
MBTI Type
INTP
Your brother may also have psychological issues aside from learning disabilities and behavioral disorders. I had similar issues as your brother for several years on account of my OCD; its extremely difficult to concentrate on complicated or unfamiliar materials while suffering from an OCD episode (which comprised the entirety of my waking hours-and a good portion of my dreaming hours-from eighth-grade through high school). I had the most trouble with math, which requires that you master preliminary steps learned over the course of those several years. Other mental illnesses may have similar effects.

Also, do you know whether there is a discrepancy between his verbal IQ and performance IQ (the actual scores are relatively unimportant, but a large discrepancy usually indicates some type of disability)?
 

nightning

ish red no longer *sad*
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
3,741
MBTI Type
INfj
I am currently taking a class on adolescence, so I could perhaps offer some advice.
Perhaps.

How old is he? last year in high school, 17

Also, how close are you guys with him? I still live at home. We interact daily but no I wouldn't say we're overly close.

Perhaps he doesn't feel comfortable divulging his true passions with you? Then there's little I can do to help if that's true is there? He's not that comfortable with chatting to the school counselor. But based on the career planning questionnaire things he completed in his CAPP class, he seems to like computers.

Where do you live, by the way?Canadaland west coast

What is your ethnic and cultural background, and is he naturally rebellious? Chinese immigrant from HK. Although my brother grew up here. Define rebellious. He has difficulties communicating with people and and has a temper. (Storms off in anger sort of thing) But overall he's a good kid.

What is your family situation, how many siblings, and what order, etc,?
Just two of us, although we're 7 years apart. My childhood was that of an only child. Although he would certainly classify as the youngest sibling. If you go by family order theories. :)

Your brother may also have psychological issues aside from learning disabilities and behavioral disorders. I had similar issues as your brother for several years on account of my OCD; its extremely difficult to concentrate on complicated or unfamiliar materials while suffering from an OCD episode (which comprised the entirety of my waking hours-and a good portion of my dreaming hours-from eighth-grade through high school). I had the most trouble with math, which requires that you master preliminary steps learned over the course of those several years. Other mental illnesses may have similar effects.

Also, do you know whether there is a discrepancy between his verbal IQ and performance IQ (the actual scores are relatively unimportant, but a large discrepancy usually indicates some type of disability)?
My sympathies to you. That would make the situation worse for him if it's true. He does tend to focus a lot of his attention on details etc. So it's a possibility. Might be best for him to see a psychiatrist then.

About verbal/performance IQ, he has never been officially tested. For the most part he just doesn't like to sit down and do IQ puzzles. Stares at the page then walks off.
 

edcoaching

New member
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
752
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
7
I Do you have suggestions for math and science? Here's where I have most difficult with finding structure. I try to teach him one method of solving the problem. But there's exceptions where I automatically picked another starting place and I couldn't tell him when to use either one. :doh: You can say these strategies comes with experience but he doesn't have the time to learn... not while keeping up with his assignments.

What math level/class is he taking? Math is taught so poorly in this country that half the Feeling types end up with math anxiety...

My daughter had a major asthma attack that caused her to fall way behind in Algebra II. Turned out the school had a Stanford Math online course license and she completed the course that way. It's very organized learning. Any chance something like that might be available?
 

nightning

ish red no longer *sad*
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
3,741
MBTI Type
INfj
What math level/class is he taking? Math is taught so poorly in this country that half the Feeling types end up with math anxiety...

My daughter had a major asthma attack that caused her to fall way behind in Algebra II. Turned out the school had a Stanford Math online course license and she completed the course that way. It's very organized learning. Any chance something like that might be available?

No online course like that available. That method isn't going to work for him either even if it can be arranged. :doh:

It's the general Math 12 as specified by the ministry of education here... http://www.bced.gov.bc.ca/irp/prmath1012.pdf (pdf)

Essentially,

arithmetic and geometric patterns & series
graphing and solving exponential, log and trig functions
trig identities
function transformation
statistics & probability
 

ptgatsby

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
4,476
MBTI Type
ISTP
No online course like that available. That method isn't going to work for him either even if it can be arranged. :doh:

It's the general Math 12 as specified by the ministry of education here... http://www.bced.gov.bc.ca/irp/prmath1012.pdf (pdf)

Essentially,

arithmetic and geometric patterns & series
graphing and solving exponential, log and trig functions
trig identities
function transformation
statistics & probability


Math 12 was pretty hard, as I remember it.

Can I ask how he managed in Math 9 (/10)?
 

nightning

ish red no longer *sad*
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
3,741
MBTI Type
INfj
He managed because he wasn't scared the heck out of the numbers. (not yet anyways) Also the material in Math 9 and 10 isn't based so heavily on what's learned in the previous years. I think there has been a bit of shuffling of the curriculum a few years ago so there were less overlap than when you and I took them.
 

ptgatsby

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2007
Messages
4,476
MBTI Type
ISTP
He managed because he wasn't scared the heck out of the numbers. (not yet anyways) Also the material in Math 9 and 10 isn't based so heavily on what's learned in the previous years. I think there has been a bit of shuffling of the curriculum a few years ago so there were less overlap than when you and I took them.

Ah, that's true... It has been over a decade. (Ouch. Now I feel old.)

I never found a good way to tutor math. I found out the hard way that math = doing. There are no real shortcuts. Doing well almost invariably implies working through a great many problems. You can show them what to do, but unless they go home and work on it every night, but the next week, you have to show it to them again. And again.

Normally I would think this would work with a SJ, especially if he has the stereotypical behaviors for asians and education... but it sounds like he is spinning wheels when he is working. The only suggestion I have in this is to focus the work he is doing. Creating worksheets and "marking" them would work... more or less to focus his work in a meaningful way.

(I'm assuming he is both motivated to do well and already spending the time, which I remember you implying - plus I'm adding in what I know of personality and cultural influences.)
 

Fiver

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Sep 26, 2008
Messages
216
MBTI Type
ENTP
What math level/class is he taking? Math is taught so poorly in this country that half the Feeling types end up with math anxiety...

Can you explain more? I am interested. The two people I know who suffered severe math anxiety were Fs.
 

nightning

ish red no longer *sad*
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
3,741
MBTI Type
INfj
Ah, that's true... It has been over a decade. (Ouch. Now I feel old.)

I never found a good way to tutor math. I found out the hard way that math = doing. There are no real shortcuts. Doing well almost invariably implies working through a great many problems. You can show them what to do, but unless they go home and work on it every night, but the next week, you have to show it to them again. And again.

Normally I would think this would work with a SJ, especially if he has the stereotypical behaviors for asians and education... but it sounds like he is spinning wheels when he is working. The only suggestion I have in this is to focus the work he is doing. Creating worksheets and "marking" them would work... more or less to focus his work in a meaningful way.

(I'm assuming he is both motivated to do well and already spending the time, which I remember you implying - plus I'm adding in what I know of personality and cultural influences.)

Old yes... 30 hits you back pretty hard doesn't it? :devil:

Yes, that's my experience with math as well. Just doing the problems. The flexibility in problem solving comes from exposure. It feels frustrating when he couldn't solve a problem using the method that I showed him. When I read the new problem, I instinctively chosen a different approach. I couldn't explain why I chosen one method for one question and a different one for another. :huh:

Only thing you can do is to spend the time. Lots of sitting down and going through problem sets since the tests at the end of the term is approaching.
 

ygolo

My termites win
Joined
Aug 6, 2007
Messages
5,988
No online course like that available. That method isn't going to work for him either even if it can be arranged. :doh:

It's the general Math 12 as specified by the ministry of education here... http://www.bced.gov.bc.ca/irp/prmath1012.pdf (pdf)

Essentially,

arithmetic and geometric patterns & series
graphing and solving exponential, log and trig functions
trig identities
function transformation
statistics & probability

Is there a particular aspect he is struggling with? I think sometimes people over-generalize their difficulties with mathematics based on only a couple of actual difficult areas.

Does he have problems finding intersections on graphs?
Does he have trouble finding the patterns, or creating closed form equations to series?
Does he simply have trouble remembering the trig. identities, or is it more an issue of knowing when to invoke one?
Can he visualize the movement or transformation of a graph based on what is done to the equation? Again, is it a problem of not remembering the transformations, or not recognizing that a function transformation is a useful idea in a problem?
Does he have trouble remembering the definitions of mean, variance, etc? or does he have trouble actually calculating or estimating them?

If he is simply not willing to remember the basics, no amount of practice applying them will help.

If he has trouble with application, then I would suggest to have him create problems. That way he understands things from the "other side." You could take turns creating and solving each other's problems. Playing stump-my-sister could be good motivation.

Also, creating ones own problems with an eye towards having the solutions be useful towards ones own interests is immensely motivating.

You say he likes computer modeling...you could talk to him about creating surfaces that look like particular things, and how function transformations apply to this as well. Want to make two peaks come closer together? How would you change the equation to do that?

If he's into card games, applying probability to this is motivating for most people.

If he notices cycles of any sort, you could show him how trigonometry applies to almost anything with a cyclical nature. A wheel that goes around, seasonal trends, the earths rotation, what ever else he can think of that is cyclical.

If he has a bank account, he can model how it would grow as a combination of geometric and arithmetic series under various conditions. He could then model what would be better or worse under various circumstances using graph intersections.

I think you get the idea.
 

Darjur

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Oct 26, 2008
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493
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5
Send him to proffesion school. It's better to have a good laborer, than a shitty academic.
 
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