I say this as a problem because people I've dated have found out how unhappy I'd been afterwards but had stayed anyway. This angered them to no end, because a relationship is two parts of a whole. They felt like I was wasting their time.
The same goes for my ENFP best friend. He stayed in his relationship waaaaaaaay past the time where he kept loving his partner, and his partner began to grow more attached. He felt bad and stayed until it became so glaringly obvious that it wouldn't work out.
Also, I can't tell you how many times I've read that page, and I'd liek to say I'm slowly improving. I used to never speak my mind in a relationship, but now I try to be honest, even at the risk of upsetting the other person. So far I've found that honesty is the best policy.
Oh man, this is exactly the problem I have had in relationships. If I'm at all interested in someone, I find it easy to establish an instant rapport- in fact, I can hardly help it. But I also can't help but know very soon afterward whether there's any actual potential in the relationship. The problem is by this point the other person is already attached, and has certain expectations about my feelings towards them- even if we've only hung out once or twice. Seeing the potential for hurt feelings, I decide to not be so hastily judgmental, and give them a chance to win me over before making a final decision.
Cut to months or years later, when I'm still dating this person who's never been right for me, solely because I empathized with them so quickly.
The hardest part is that I always feel I am being really honest in relationships- I never lie, or say anything I don't mean. My general attitude has been "Hey, I don't want to be with this person forever, but if they want to hang out for a while anyway, why not?"- and I've said as much to partners before.
The problem is, if you don't just break up with someone, they are never going to get that you have stopped considering them as a permanent option, no matter what you say. Particularly if you're an ENFP I think, because our empathetic behavior can often belie our true feelings for someone.
I'm getting much better about trusting my initial judgments, so at least I don't convince myself to see potential in relationships that doesn't exist (as much as I used to anyway). But it is still really hard to tell someone you aren't interested in them any more when you know, from their perspective, that you've seemed totally dedicated and interested from the start, and shouldn't be ready to call it quits so soon.
So I just try to remember that altruism is a terrible and condescending reason to stay in a relationship with anyone heh. And I am getting better about being more reserved at the beginning of a relationship, so that the other person doesn't feel swept up in a whirlwind romance right from the start, only to have it unexpectedly fizzle out.
Basically, I'm learning that in order to be respectful and honest, sometimes I have to let my empathy and general interest in people show a little bit less, even though this can feel self-abnegating in the moment.
But it is difficult. ENFPs get some flak for carelessly manipulating people's emotions, but it's not all on us. People are such dicks to each other all the time that if you're just kind and respectful to people, you often convince them that they occupy some particularly special place in your affections, even if that was not your intent. ENFPs may desire other people's approval, but people also tend to need OUR affection and approval more than they might like to admit, or than is fair to expect of us. I still occasionally get bitter emails from old friends or even exes complaining that I'm a jerk for not being in touch more- even though the entire relationship is about me supporting them through their troubles, and they can't be bothered to consider whether I get anything out of our interactions.
Actually, that describes most of my interpersonal relations, come to think of it. I know a lot of people who need to figure out how to get their shit together themselves, rather than always expecting me to do it for them just because my advice is usually right haha.
Sorry for the tl;dr, but this is my first post...