Hey all, new here.
So I have this thing that tends to happen to me in relationships and when dating seriously. Its basically this sudden realization of how much you care about this person, and a realization of how bad its going to hurt if things go south. That may sound like a slightly pessimistic thing, but I guess I've just been crushed so many times that I tend to play things defensively. Optimistically, but defensively.
Anyways, example:
I tend to move slowly with relationships. There was this one girl that was really into me awhile back. She was a ESTJ type, and we had been on a good number of dates. We got to a point where she was desperate for some kind of commitment from me, but for one reason or another I wasn't sure I was ready to really "let her in" to my life. Anyways, I basically finally decided to go with it, to go with her, and things really began to take off from there. I developed very deep feelings for her very fast.
One night, we were out "country dancing". That seems to be a big thing here lately, and honestly I'm not much of a fan, but she really enjoys it, so I offered to go one night with a group of friends. Well, there was this one guy in our group, kind of a bigger dude, and he seemed really interested in learning all the crazy lifts and swings. It seemed to me he just liked the excuse to touch and grab women. Well it just so happened that my girl knew all of the crazy moves and how to do them, so she was showing him a bunch of stuff.
ANYWAYS, so I was kind of standing back and watching from a distance. I was watching her being thrown around and laughing, and suddenly I just got this immense feeling of melancholy and fondness, it was weird. She seemed absolutely perfect and incomparably special in that moment. Like I knew she was someone incredibly unique and extraordinary, and I would probably never find another person like her if I somehow lost her.
Well, fast forward about a year. Our relationship ended after a very beautiful and intense 3 months of being together. I was right, I have yet to find another like her, but since then I've noticed that these moments tend to happen in the relationships that really matter to me.
Am I a weirdo? Perhaps this is a strange topic, but I am bored here at work, and my mind is teeming with all sorts of crazy thoughts right now. Figured I'd pluck one and throw it out there for some discussion
So I have this thing that tends to happen to me in relationships and when dating seriously. Its basically this sudden realization of how much you care about this person, and a realization of how bad its going to hurt if things go south. That may sound like a slightly pessimistic thing, but I guess I've just been crushed so many times that I tend to play things defensively. Optimistically, but defensively.
Anyways, example:
I tend to move slowly with relationships. There was this one girl that was really into me awhile back. She was a ESTJ type, and we had been on a good number of dates. We got to a point where she was desperate for some kind of commitment from me, but for one reason or another I wasn't sure I was ready to really "let her in" to my life. Anyways, I basically finally decided to go with it, to go with her, and things really began to take off from there. I developed very deep feelings for her very fast.
One night, we were out "country dancing". That seems to be a big thing here lately, and honestly I'm not much of a fan, but she really enjoys it, so I offered to go one night with a group of friends. Well, there was this one guy in our group, kind of a bigger dude, and he seemed really interested in learning all the crazy lifts and swings. It seemed to me he just liked the excuse to touch and grab women. Well it just so happened that my girl knew all of the crazy moves and how to do them, so she was showing him a bunch of stuff.
ANYWAYS, so I was kind of standing back and watching from a distance. I was watching her being thrown around and laughing, and suddenly I just got this immense feeling of melancholy and fondness, it was weird. She seemed absolutely perfect and incomparably special in that moment. Like I knew she was someone incredibly unique and extraordinary, and I would probably never find another person like her if I somehow lost her.
Well, fast forward about a year. Our relationship ended after a very beautiful and intense 3 months of being together. I was right, I have yet to find another like her, but since then I've noticed that these moments tend to happen in the relationships that really matter to me.
Am I a weirdo? Perhaps this is a strange topic, but I am bored here at work, and my mind is teeming with all sorts of crazy thoughts right now. Figured I'd pluck one and throw it out there for some discussion