Geez @
kyuuei you're such a beast, in the best complimentary way.
My best horror story was from when I was fairly young, maybe around 9 or 10. My dentist was some stuck up prick named Norman who was a jerk to the hygienists and who would talk to my mom like he was the prince of some minor kingdom. In retrospect, I probably would have been in a shitty mood if I were a hygienist working with him, too, but at the time all I could think about was how much this evil woman in white was digging into my damned gums with that cutting piece of floss. I could see the blood on the floss and I could taste its metallicness in my mouth, but this bitch just kept on digging away. I squirmed, I grunted, I made ouchey faces. I'd even told her beforehand that my gums were sore because I always came away after appointments with a bloody mess of a mouth. Well, at one point I decided that she'd just taken it too far, after ramming it down between two particularly close teeth. I was pissed. I took a good deep breath, opened wide, and chomped right down on her hand. She screamed; I giggled. Then I lied to everyone all about how it was just a reflex to the pain while attempting to hold back an absolute flood of laughter.
The happy ending is that I got kicked out of the dentist's office, got a much nicer new dentist with much gentler hygienists, and the whole family agreed that Norman needed to get a life and the hygienist got what was coming to her. I think my parents even got me ice cream afterwards.