Can we list our approximate ages (even by decades people) and how many relationships we've been in? I love that people feel comfortable sharing and personally find it very illuminating -- but, without context it's not nearly as helpful.
For instance, some people say that haven't been in 'many' or 'any' relationships but if you are 21 or under I think that can be contributed to literally years of opportunity and experimenting versus if you are in your 50s which might be contributed to having married your highschool sweetheart and still being together or just being an incredibly private person who prefers being alone.
Also, are we defining "breakups" as only official dating partner relationships w/ physical intimacy, even if the physical intimacy is only holding hands? Do we only count break-ups past the age of 18? Is 'dating' considered different from being "in a relationship" and if so, do we count dating breakups to? Also, aren't people responses in 'breakups' really dependent on what the relationship and the person meant to them and if they are the kind fo person who 'sees the writing on the wall' for a while or is the person doing the dumping?
I think some people are just very casual about their relationships and aren't deeply invested usually so breakups ain't no thing. But some people are HARDCORE monogamists who take their relationships very seriously investing a lot of time and energy, so even if they weren't deeply in love with the person, breaking up is hard because it's such a loss or change for them.
Just my 2 cents.
I hate to be a stinker on this, but these things do matter!
And yes, I would personally love to hear more details from me people, because I like context.
To answer your questions...
I am in my late twenties. I'm a "hardcore monogamist" as you described, for the most part & I've had a couple serious relationships (one lasting 6 years!). Though, in between long term relationships, I tend to always be casually dating someone. However, I will not call it a relationship & ultimately give them my commitment & innermost self unless I am serious about them. As for break ups I'm describing, I mean only the real relationships - with a small exception of a close friendship that crossed the line & got way too complicated. That one felt like a break up. I will say that I've been described as the "girl who always has a boyfriend", though.
I agree with --> "Also, aren't people responses in 'breakups' really dependent on what the relationship and the person meant to them and if they are the kind fo person who 'sees the writing on the wall' for a while or is the person doing the dumping?"
I tend to cut off communication regardless of who did the dumping. I need to do it in order to get over the relationship and move on. However, if I am doing the dirty deed, then I don't always go into analytical/self help mode afterwards. I'm usually on the receiving end of the dumping, though, because I tend to stick around in relationships long after they should be over.