There are on average 6 days of the month where I get to be a recluse.
This may be the issue, then. I know it sounds like, "heads I win, tails you lose", but too much extroversion will ensure that an INTJ is annoyed by almost everyone. Lack of time for introversion is much like lack of sleep. I'd assumed excessive introversion because that is by far more common than excessive extroversion for INTJs: my bad.
The fact you dont agree with my view of humanity doesn't make me a broken individual. It makes me someone who has gone out, been exposed a large cross-section and then come to a conclusion which is entirely my own. Not asking you to subscribe To my thoughts but likewise not asking for a psychological assessment of my perceived normalcy based on posts in a forum either.
It isn't about whether
you are "broken." The title of the thread is, "Is this hell?" The title indicates lack of
discernment. I would have the same kind of reply to, "Is this heaven?"
This is victim blaming. The obvious counter is ... so why would people create horrible things to happen to them? State of mind matters a little, sure. It's important to keep the best attitude possible. Possible. People have limits, though. Would you tell a rape victim to shush and stop feeling miserable because it is her fault for creating that perspective of misery? Sorry, I know it would be nice to just choose how you feel, but that's not how shit works. What you've given us is a convenient way for the fortunate to lazily write off the pain that others truly feel.
No, it isn't victim blaming. Yes, it is an attitude adjustment.
Note that the focus of my writing is on
discernment. I supply no rose-colored glasses. Discernment implies seeing both the good and the bad. If it looks all bad or all good, then one is lying to oneself in some regard or another.
Look around you and take inventory. What we call civilization is far from utopia; there is still a massive degree of brutal realism. The rules of evolution and nature still dominate.
So "This is hell" because civilization is not utopia?
It is what it is. I am not trying to look at it positively or negatively. Last night I wrote a long-winded post about my sense of wonder about the world. Sometimes things are good. However, ugliness is not simply a matter of changing it by trying to frame it in a positive light. Ugliness just IS. That's the bitter pill of life, because we all know damn well how things should be. Life should be good. We should all be happy. Things should be fair. Why wouldn't they be? Who, having not even asked to be born, deserves to suffer?
The tone of your post was looking at it negatively. So you wrote another post elsewhere that was more positive. The post to which I replied wasn't saying, "It is what it is."
I agree with "It is what it is." The problem most people have is with
discerning "what it is." We tend to project our own idealistic expectations and values on a world that cannot possibly meet them.
No offense but I strongly disagree with this idea. I've heard it many times before. Basically what you are saying is that one should delude oneself in order to cope with things. To put it into the extreme : maybe we can all "shift our perspective" on things and then the Nazi's will seem like a bunch of harmless supertroopers. Some people are dicks no matter what colored glasses you're wearing.
Godwin's Law!
The main root of frustrations lies within expectations, not perspective. We all have a tendency to expect that things go as planned, and they usually don't. We are even brought up with the idea that we will be happy. Ludicrous ! Expect the unexpected and you will be less disappointed. Great expectations lead to great disappointments.
I don't disagree with this, except to the extent you differentiate expectations from perspective.
And another thing : I don't know what world you're living in, but in this one a lot of people are born in poverty and they die in poverty, to name just one more source of misery. Saying that we choose our own hell is incredibly ignorant. But yeah, that probably goes for the odd rich kid that decides to get hooked on smack, but that's hardly representative.
Waitaminute ... you're responding to my statements about choosing perspectives about
people, but now your "misery barometer" is calibrated to materialistic concerns? You manage to use a straw man argument without ever crafting the straw man first, but rather imply the straw man's existence.
The existence of poverty does not imply that people are evil, nor that the world is hell. Nor does being "in poverty" imply that one is unhappy. More specifically, if one is sick, or hungry/starving, then yes, there is suffering. But there is far more suffering in the realm of human experience than that of the physical/material variety. No, changing your attitude won't end your hunger, but it might make you behave better in the presence of other people and perhaps gain a glimpse of heaven.