I can completely understand your feelings iluvstellacat, because believe it or not, I've very often in the past been victim myself to people who feel the need to 'improve' me, unsolicited pedagogy can be most irritating!!!
I have an ESFP friend who, though we get along great now, to begin with our friendship nearly faltered at the starting blocks because he insisted on inviting me to these middle class dinner parties where the other guests were like judges and lawyers and surgeons and professors and stuff and I just had nothing to say, at that point I was just a single parent dependent on state welfare and I hadn't been to college, I'd just sit there feeling totally out of my element and like I had nothing to say, even if i did, they didn't listen to me anyway because they just didn't see me as 'good enough'. I'd keep turning down these invitations after a while but this guy would insist it'd be 'good for me' to go, and he'd go on at length with amateur shrink nonsense about how I had to overcome my 'social phobia'. It really annoyed me because as you can see, I'm a VERY sociable person. But nobody likes being a fish out of water all the damn time!!
There is such a thing as letting a person be themselves and respecting who they are, and people who don't do that are no.1 on my hitlist, I assure you!! But by the same token there's also such a thing as taking responsibility for one's own flaws and self-improvement, and not blaming the triggering of one's flaws and the self-disapppointment we feel when they're triggered, on the person who triggered them when that trigger was just them trying to be friendly...
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But this leads me onto something else: I know that it isn't always hard work for introverts to talk. In fact, I know an ISTP who will rant until the cows come home, an ISTJ who will talk forever about movies and the latest scientific theories from New Scientist, and an INFP who will sit on the sofa and, for as long as you keep passing her coffee and cake, she'll keep chattering away with you until the small hours, with no sign whatsoever of fatigue and every sign of feeling quite energized and happy.
You must admit that at least sometimes, it's not REALLY because talking is such a chore, but perhaps something else? Is it possible that the introvert might sometimse have been too quick to judge a person as not worth talking to? Or do they really want to talk but are just too shy or nervous?
I mean there has to be some less, well, less aggressive, less hostile reasons why a) an introvert doesn't want to talk and b) an extravert does.