@Vasilisa: I'm sorry that I used wrong words and I also think I'm wrong in the point of view of love or the way I feel the love .... ( I'm really bad in describing my feeling).
But you know that, I sincerely love her from the time I know that she waited her close friend (she loved him) 2 years in sadness.
The story is that she and her close friend go together in 2 years. After that, they get into university. From that time, she and he is no longer close like the past. From that time, she's lonely, sad, hurt so much and ... it took 2 years.
She share all those things to me (as a brother) and I know that, from that time, I fell in love with her.
I really love when I realize she's so Loyal, faithful. She love people, She's tolerant; generous. She's sincere but also very intelligent (maybe more than me). But because of that, I realize that her heart is the huge castle that I can't get into.
It's so hard with me, the one that have problem in reveal emotion, feeling. the one that have problem to talk with the heart inside.
Awww, the tenderness of the feelings in your heart do come through here.
The one thing is, Tommyrader, I don't want to see you thrashing yourself for not having the gumption to immediately deliver some kind of sufficiently sweeping, mushy declaration of love. That is not the surefire way into the castle, using your metaphor. It could (could because I don't speak for all INFJs or her) be a bit like using a battering ram.
You
see her, right, Tommyrader? You beautifully listed things about her (devotion, gentleness, depth of emotion) that move your spirit. And since that resonates inside of you, surely its possible to connect in an exchange. Another beautiful thing is that there may be things in you that she notices and really admires and can connect with aspects in herself. As an INFJ, I don't think I'm looking for a mirror necessarily, I love the differences in people and how those differences can bring about a new consonance, or harmony, for us both. Its a way of intimate growing that appeals to me, maybe other INFJs, too. You say shes intelligent, have you shared any
deep conversations on intellectual topics with her? Personally, I love people who will graciously share insight about topics with me, idea exchange with people from completely different perspectives, who have courtesy and do not condescend.
There are some pronouncements put forward on this forum that INFJs need to know your feelings and perceptions regarding them bluntly, the moment you have them. And I just don't find that to be that case in myself. Just personally, I feel comfortable in a more organic progress in getting close to someone. Sincere, but not hurried. I'm a sucker for the romantic, but that may not be the same thing as Hollywood depicted romance. The symbolic really appeals to me. Thats why above I used the word exchange, not necessarily conversation. There
are threads about INFJs own habits in pursuing someone romantically. That might give you some insight, too. For me I love to really listen to my favorite person, and hold on to their words and the meaning and remember them. And when someone does that for me its quite nice. So, I just hope that you realize you don't have to steel yourself into being some sort of verbal emo battering ram, if it doesn't seem true to who you are. There are other ways in the castle.
Simply loving someone does take courage, and sharing your heart takes courage and strength. I think you will find them within yourself.
Sometimes the right moment just presents itself and you know its time to speak your sincere truth and you find the bravery within yourself naturally. And that is a joyous thing.