I am a female ENFP and there's this ESFP guy who seems to be totally into me. We met about 2 years ago and he started liking me (ie. flirting) while he was still with another girl so that was a huge turn-off for me.
He started suggesting we get together as a couple a few months into knowing each other. Its been quite on-off for us; we talk for a while then when he gets too clingy/annoying I ignore him for periods of time.
Around him i turn into quite an ENTP, with all that one-up-manship going on. I can get quite skeptical and cynical (well as skeptical and cynical as a fluffy ENFP can get) when around him, because I am always suspicious of his trying to charm me. (my ENTPness comes out and then it humiliates me intensely to be manipulated/taken in my someone else)
I don't like him romantically, and can never picture us together. I want long-term commitment and stability and those are just not ESFP things. As an ENFP i am terribly embarrassed to say, in my younger days, that his attention secretly thrilled me. Now its just annoying, and suffocating (I get "please don't ignore me " text messages more times than I can count)
The topic of us being a couple has come up many times (he always brings it up every couple of months) and I always decline. Recently, I explained my rationale for turning him down (ie. my need for stability and security in a loving relationship doesn't mesh with his commitment issues). However, he said straight away that he'd "change" for me, he'd do "anything" for me.
I am 99% sure I don't believe him, but the part of me that's attuned to 'What Could Be' is holding me back from totally disregarding that statement.
Either way, I do not want to go into a relationship with him. Not now, at least.
So my question is, HOW DO I GET HIM TO STOP LIKING ME??? How can i get him off me? Without being too mean that things would be awkward between us?
Any input will be greatly appreciated!
He started suggesting we get together as a couple a few months into knowing each other. Its been quite on-off for us; we talk for a while then when he gets too clingy/annoying I ignore him for periods of time.
Around him i turn into quite an ENTP, with all that one-up-manship going on. I can get quite skeptical and cynical (well as skeptical and cynical as a fluffy ENFP can get) when around him, because I am always suspicious of his trying to charm me. (my ENTPness comes out and then it humiliates me intensely to be manipulated/taken in my someone else)
I don't like him romantically, and can never picture us together. I want long-term commitment and stability and those are just not ESFP things. As an ENFP i am terribly embarrassed to say, in my younger days, that his attention secretly thrilled me. Now its just annoying, and suffocating (I get "please don't ignore me " text messages more times than I can count)
The topic of us being a couple has come up many times (he always brings it up every couple of months) and I always decline. Recently, I explained my rationale for turning him down (ie. my need for stability and security in a loving relationship doesn't mesh with his commitment issues). However, he said straight away that he'd "change" for me, he'd do "anything" for me.
I am 99% sure I don't believe him, but the part of me that's attuned to 'What Could Be' is holding me back from totally disregarding that statement.
Either way, I do not want to go into a relationship with him. Not now, at least.
So my question is, HOW DO I GET HIM TO STOP LIKING ME??? How can i get him off me? Without being too mean that things would be awkward between us?
Any input will be greatly appreciated!