jenocyde
half mystic, half skeksis
- Joined
- Jan 2, 2009
- Messages
- 6,387
- MBTI Type
- ENTP
- Enneagram
- 7w8
Yeah, the thing is that sometimes when people make plans with you, they want to spend actual time with you. Or possibly they feel their own brand of guilt since they haven't reached out to you in a while. So when they arrange their day to accommodate you and you don't show up, it shows a serious lack of respect for them and their time. Essentially, it's like saying "I am more important than you and I can keep you waiting because my time is more valuable than yours."
I have a rule of thumb - if something involves 3 other people or more, chances are that I won't even be missed if I forget to show up. But if it's an intimately sized group, there were reasons for including me specifically and it's less "the more the merrier" and more of "I want to spend time with you specifically", so I am less apt to cancel. Basically, I figure out in advance if my absence will be noticed and/or felt.
I have a rule of thumb - if something involves 3 other people or more, chances are that I won't even be missed if I forget to show up. But if it's an intimately sized group, there were reasons for including me specifically and it's less "the more the merrier" and more of "I want to spend time with you specifically", so I am less apt to cancel. Basically, I figure out in advance if my absence will be noticed and/or felt.