Hey Sexist, thanks for the fuller explanation.
And don't take this as an attack, b/c it's not, just wanted to make the observation that you seem to be responsible for attracting and choosing women you don't want.
RE: You like attention, you give back attention and spend time with women indiscriminately, you keep choosing venues where you yourself say you don't meet 'quality women'. I think it's safe to say in this case that you 1) limiting your pool by the places you choose and 2) attracting people with the energy you put out, which in this case is alpha-male who likes ego stroking at kegger like parties?
A lot of guys (and women) avoid those kind of parties altogether for meeting dates. No clubs, no bars. Or rather more high-brow or self-selecting places like jazz clubs, lounges, etc. You can also meet women at book and movie clubs, museums, bookstores, etc. I actually really enjoy conferences, symposiums, etc. and have met people that way 'cause I'm a nerd like that. Aren't there women gun enthusiasts in gun clubs?
First, I disagree that the women you meet aren't smart (heck, maybe I'd agree if I met them but just playing devil's advocate). I'd guess they are young in their life stage and outlook in life and not intellectually or philosophically inclined, but that's not necessarily 'not smart'.
And I also disagree you can't figure some things out from first meeting. You can ask strategic questions and get a feel for a person's inclinations, politics, etc.
I don't think I've ever gotten a number (platonically or otherwise) from someone that I later regretted or deemed to be 'not smart', immature, or shallow. *knock on wood*
So in conclusion, some suggestions for helping your dating life:
1) Choose venues wisely for meeting women
2) Use your ENFP'ness man to get a feel for women before getting the digits
3) Put out more thoughtful/intellectual and less 'party' energy if you are looking for a thoughtful/intellectual and less of a party girl (laws of attraction)
But...since it looks like you're trying to get back with your ex, these may be moot points.
Good luck, either way.