Hi,
I'm a college student majoring in business (ah why did I do that I regret it so much), which, as I learned later (ironically in my organization management class), is predominantly consisting of SJs, especially ESFJ/ESTJs.
Sure enough, the last team project was awful. I was on a team with this long-term friend of mine who was an ESFJ, but half way through the project, she started acting all bitchy at me for no reason (the only think I could think of was because I got much more attention from guys when the project team went to a retreat during spring break. She accused me of acting "loose," but was only nice to me when other guys were around).
She would immediately shoot down any of my contributions to brainstorming, always quick to correct me (which majority of time she turned out to be wrong), and would have to have her way in doing things, whether it's the format of the writing or where to place the picture in the report, what size font to use, etc.
I detest being controlled and told what to do in detail, especially if I am doing things right. So I started withdrawing, only doing what's asked of me to do, never less, but never more. When she would boss me around, I would intentionally not pick up her call, and wait to give her my portion of the work until the last minute deadline.
I am so relieved that the project is finally coming to an end. But I am still angry at her for personally attacking me on many occasions (she's called me "bipolar" because usually I'm a warm friendly person but I started withdrawing). I want to call her out and bitch the crap out of her. But business school is all about keeping your composure, and as much as I hated her treatment of me, I deemed it wise to keep quiet and endure for the duration of the project.
Now that the project is done, I am definitely cutting her off from my contacts, there's no doubts about that. But I have a choice of whether to bring up the problem with her, or just let it pass, and let action speak louder than my words. What would you do if you were in my situation? How in the future can I best deal with these control freak people?
I'm a college student majoring in business (ah why did I do that I regret it so much), which, as I learned later (ironically in my organization management class), is predominantly consisting of SJs, especially ESFJ/ESTJs.
Sure enough, the last team project was awful. I was on a team with this long-term friend of mine who was an ESFJ, but half way through the project, she started acting all bitchy at me for no reason (the only think I could think of was because I got much more attention from guys when the project team went to a retreat during spring break. She accused me of acting "loose," but was only nice to me when other guys were around).
She would immediately shoot down any of my contributions to brainstorming, always quick to correct me (which majority of time she turned out to be wrong), and would have to have her way in doing things, whether it's the format of the writing or where to place the picture in the report, what size font to use, etc.
I detest being controlled and told what to do in detail, especially if I am doing things right. So I started withdrawing, only doing what's asked of me to do, never less, but never more. When she would boss me around, I would intentionally not pick up her call, and wait to give her my portion of the work until the last minute deadline.
I am so relieved that the project is finally coming to an end. But I am still angry at her for personally attacking me on many occasions (she's called me "bipolar" because usually I'm a warm friendly person but I started withdrawing). I want to call her out and bitch the crap out of her. But business school is all about keeping your composure, and as much as I hated her treatment of me, I deemed it wise to keep quiet and endure for the duration of the project.
Now that the project is done, I am definitely cutting her off from my contacts, there's no doubts about that. But I have a choice of whether to bring up the problem with her, or just let it pass, and let action speak louder than my words. What would you do if you were in my situation? How in the future can I best deal with these control freak people?