Santosha
New member
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2011
- Messages
- 1,516
- MBTI Type
- HUMR
- Enneagram
- 6
- Instinctual Variant
- sx
I wonder how common this is for ENFP's.
Most of the time I can be a very understanding, nurturing, sensitive person. In the last few years however, I've seen my personality shift a bit. Actually, other people have mentioned it to me and that is what has got me thinking.. how common is this for ENFP's?
What it really boils down to, is that I sometimes get tired of walking on eggshells and comforting people who refuse to understand just how many of there problems are self-created. I'm not an exception to this at all.. but for along time now when I do have probs, after I let the emotions blow over and what-not, it almost always comes back to something I can control, or change. I believe each person is the captain of their destiny, and really hate wasting time jusitfying how I, or anyone else is a hopeless victim of circumstance. This mindset has caused me to become rather impatient with *certain people* .. with little tolerance for emotional wallowing, or what I see as an ignoring of the real problem.
I often feel compelled to be brutally honest with those closest to me. I see this honesty as being sooo much more valueable than making them feel warm and fuzzy. I see it as sincere, and I do it because I care for these people. I care so much, infact, that I'm not going to bullshit them and tell them they are not fat, that the D- on a term paper wasn't fair, that gettind dumped was totally on the other person, so they can continue on making the same mistakes. Yet as much as I see this brutally honest, or direct responce as a sign of caring, it tends to come off as "cruel" or "insensitive" at times, no matter how soft I try to convey it.
Do any of you other ENFP's struggle to find a balance with this?
Most of the time I can be a very understanding, nurturing, sensitive person. In the last few years however, I've seen my personality shift a bit. Actually, other people have mentioned it to me and that is what has got me thinking.. how common is this for ENFP's?
What it really boils down to, is that I sometimes get tired of walking on eggshells and comforting people who refuse to understand just how many of there problems are self-created. I'm not an exception to this at all.. but for along time now when I do have probs, after I let the emotions blow over and what-not, it almost always comes back to something I can control, or change. I believe each person is the captain of their destiny, and really hate wasting time jusitfying how I, or anyone else is a hopeless victim of circumstance. This mindset has caused me to become rather impatient with *certain people* .. with little tolerance for emotional wallowing, or what I see as an ignoring of the real problem.
I often feel compelled to be brutally honest with those closest to me. I see this honesty as being sooo much more valueable than making them feel warm and fuzzy. I see it as sincere, and I do it because I care for these people. I care so much, infact, that I'm not going to bullshit them and tell them they are not fat, that the D- on a term paper wasn't fair, that gettind dumped was totally on the other person, so they can continue on making the same mistakes. Yet as much as I see this brutally honest, or direct responce as a sign of caring, it tends to come off as "cruel" or "insensitive" at times, no matter how soft I try to convey it.
Do any of you other ENFP's struggle to find a balance with this?