1. Privacy. I don't wish to change but it's apparently an issue for others. I do know I'm at the extreme end. Do not read my notebooks, do not spy on me online and do not divulge something very personal that I told you, especially in a frivolous fashion. The former will give me the icks, the latter will get you booted out of my life. I would possibly forgive cheating before I could forgive that.
2. Self-reliance. It doesn't mean I always achieve it, especially at times when I am reaching for multiple goals. But I am very uncomfortable if I have to depend on someone else. It makes a relationship tough if the needs of the relationship conflict with my desire to make sure I can stand on my own two feet. e.g. putting my career on hold to be with someone whose career requires traveling or living elsewhere. I can do it but I'm hugely uncomfortable and it's a big leap of faith that the other person will remember the sacrifice you are making to be with them. I don't trust power imbalances like that in a relationship. Strangely enough, I have no issue with supporting someone. This is what makes it an issue though, I can't accept that from someone else because I don't trust them to be fair.
3. Dropping off the face of the earth. Again, not a problem for me but it is for others and in hindsight, I can see that it seems I don't care. When I am under the gun emotionally though it's all I can do to put one foot in front of the other as in paying my bills and eating.
4. Being inexpressive (so I'm told). Idk if others experience their feelings the way I do but I'm actually very uncomfortable with difficult feelings and feelings that threaten to disrupt my equilibrium. I like being calm. I prefer to be stoic. IRL my intimates think of me as rather unfeeling which always brings a wry smile to the face and then if they keep going, seriously pissed off silence. As though I haven't explained myself umpteen times before. And as though I haven't been the same way my entire life. Lol.
4a. I don't like someone trying to elicit an emotional reaction from me either. It greatly annoys me. I should say that I do test as INTJ and I do identify with some of the descriptions but perhaps due to the very Fe-oriented way I was raised, people are important to me. I am more driven than INTJs I know to connect, explain myself and find harmony, esp in debate.
5. Oh yes, another thing that I shut down with is the "I'm right/you're wrong" style of conversation/debate. It's uncreative and boring, my mind can't grip because all I can see is point scoring, which makes it pointless (point-less even, nil all.). In discussion, I am interested in finding the truth of something or revealing something new. I don't want to hear someone just parrot what they learned from someone else. I like when someone runs it through their own world-filter first.
6. Forced competition annoys me. I guess I pull the unbeatable move of refusing to compete, haha.
7. I don't like repeating myself seemingly endlessly.
8. Trouble leaving bad relationships. I try to ask myself regularly "is this working?" It helps.
9. Selective, extreme misanthropy. i.e. Extreme dislike of braggarts. Maybe this is more of a personal thing than related to a liking for authenticity that I figure INFJs share, but, ugh!!! STFU already. It makes me think(/know) you are standing on thin air. Loudmouths also drive me nuts.
10. Finishing people's sentences. The biggest way I annoy people is that I do the sentence finishing thing when it's an exciting conversation :/. I hate myself after when I do that. Short of holding my hand over my mouth (which I have done before) it's very hard for me to not jump on something someone says when we are vibing. This is a serious problem for me and I'm a repeat offender. :/