Anyway, I have quite a few questions on this topic and have done some interesting reading on it just lately, most interestingly, and I wish I had the reference here but I do not, that neither traits objectively exist and that adaptive, healthy, adjusted individuals will deploy thinking and behaviour associated with either as it suits them to provide stimulation or de-stimulation. I'm not convinced on that one and a lot of authors dont appear to be either.
I'm not convinced of it either. You can look at two young children of the very same family (both living in relatively safe environments - meaning empty of any severe abuse) and those two siblings can very well show signs of different preferences - one for introversion, the other for extroversion. I can think of one very good example right off the bat. I know a little girl who is EXTREMELY introverted. If a stranger talks to her, she will turn her back, bite her lip, and stay silent with a slight, shy grin. I can relate. A lot of what I've read (and it rings true of myself) is that things like this are "shields" that introverts learn to use to keep all the social stimuli at bay. We take in so much (all the little nuances of the environment), that it becomes stressful - that's why we need to be alone to recharge - so we can tune all that stuff out, we don't have to deal with it all. Ask any INxx. That stuff wears you out after a while. Anyways, this girls 2 siblings are non-stop, full of energy, always talking, always playing, always engaging.
Do you think that either is objectively valued and promoted rather than the other? Is society conditioning people to be either more introverted or more extroverted and why?
The U.S. is most definitely an extrovert-friendly society. There are a few introvert-friendly societies in the world, but this isn't one of them. In the case of this little girl, she's simply learning how to cope with society the best she knows how. It might be overwhelming for her to engage in conversation with someone who she doesn't know at all - and maybe she's very "worn out" from being at school all day as well. I used to come home and close my bedroom door for the night - only coming out for dinner. I also used to get sick ALL THE TIME as a kid. I would play all weekend, then go to school all week and be completely exhausted mentally. My body would get physically sick - influenza, earaches, stomach aches, etc. There are books that talk about this - the mental overload begins to affect physiology. As an adult, I monitor this. When I need to recharge, I recharge. And I don't get sick anymore. Hardly ever. But, when people do this (close the door for hours, refuse to go out, turn your back instead of being outgoing) adults think that "something is wrong". Or in the case of introverted adults, when we don't want to go "have dinner and a drink" with "the boys from work" on a Friday night, we're seen as strange. "Why wouldn't you want to go", they ask, "it will be fun!"
Fun for who? That sounds like more work to me. I want to go home and relax and get my bearings back.
Lately I think there's been a lot of Intraversion publishing, at least these books are being offered to reviewers in the Amazon Vine programme for review a few months in a row, but that publishing could be a canny ploy to a captive market if there are a lot of people mistaking social anxiety or whatever for a personality trait.
Not sure what you mean here. I have social anxiety. It's real. While I absolutely refuse to wallow in it or to allow it to be my "excuse" (or to let it keep me from doing what I want to do in life), it's something that certainly exists. Those who have it, know it (or know that something about them is different). There is a lot of newly published material out there on introversion. And 75% of it has been very informative and useful to me, and I'm sure to many other introverts as well.
On the other hand I've never seen a book dedicated to overcoming the problems experienced or anticipated and associated with extroversion, so its clearly not considered that debilitating.
1. It's not really seen as a problem by extroverts, because it is rewarded/looked highly upon. No need to write a book on the shortcomings of extroversion if it's a great trait to have and you're well liked if you have it. But, I will say this: the books on introversion touch on this very topic. They explain the "good side" of introversion - which also sheds light on the "bad side" of extreme extroversion. Introversion allows one to know the self. It's reflective, it thinks things through. It takes time to de-stress, to relax, to rest.
Just like introverts can fall into the trap of thinking that they don't need to be social (and it feels so natrural - we have to fight that tendency), extroverts feel very natural to just keep engaging with people all the time. To never be alone. They need to take time out, relax, get rest for the body and the mind. Just chill baby!
Going back to the "dinner and a drink" on Friday night example, this is where we see the difference in introverts and extroverts. After working all week, the introvert is done. He wants to be alone, chill out, relax, and rest - largely by himself - no conversation, no people. We just did all of that all week - we can't keep it up all day, every day, nor would we want to.
The extrovert wants to go out on Friday night, and then go visit family on Saturday, and then invite people over for a BBQ on Sunday, before going back to work on Monday. That's just WAY too much for most introverts.