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  1. #1

    Default (hopefully) last TypeMe thread; ENFJ, INFJ, INFP or INTP? help highly appreciated

    Hi, i am really really "despearte" about this issue since I can't narrow my type don. I read everything about functions I could but I somehow can not say what really applies to me.

    The 4 types which I listed in the title are the types that I think I could be. I'm not so sure if INFP is in the set of possibilities really since I don't think that I use Fi. Buuut I had people telling me that my descriptions are SCREAMING INFP, although you somehow can't sense Fi, don't know about that but maybe someone can solve that issue also.

    I don't really know where to start.. I think I'll tell you overall things first; I'm turning 19 in a few days, I had a pretty pretty hard youth, had to deal with several mental health issues like an eating disorder, depression and I had an abusive boyfriend till June. Since I broke up with him I got a lot better, the relationship showed me a lot of underlying motives and vicious circles I was in and I managed to overcome the most. So, now I'm a pretty positive, cheerful and happy person! More about that later on.
    I started studying biological chemistry a month ago und I like it so much, although it is so much to do. I am having only chemistry the first year and what I like so much about it is, that you can understand it all so utterly and deeply, and make sense of all the things that are happening around you. (Like why water boils at higher temperature (and you need more energy) if you put salt in it and why you put salts on the streets in winter and things like that) We had the most important exam of this semester a week ago and I passed, so I had to study a lot by now, just for the reference. I would really like to go into promotion to do my PhD and become a researcher.
    I also started to become really really outgoing since university started, I am surrounded by a crowd or gang of people I met most of the time and I really enjoy those new aquintances (also made friends so far) I'm the one who always helps everyone when I can, I share every bit of information that I have and other's don't (I know a few people from higher semesters) and I'm pretty crazy, bubbly and motivated so I guess people like me for that.


    So, on the one hand I'm pretty helpful and just like people and like being sociable and all but I can also be very observant and intuitive. I have the feeling that I often just "get" people, I'm having gut feelings of whom I can trust (although I really need to work on trusting and going by them more, I just find myself mistrusting these bad feelings about people and then later on I see the mess) And I also somehow can premonitor in which a situation may be going. For example: I was having a small group of friends and I knew that because of former events, trouble may be caused. I tried to take steps to prevent that, talked to one person about that (and he was SO oblivious to it all, it hurt) the point was, he was so so oblivious to it and didn't understand me or wanted to understand me and then the thing which I thought would happen happened.
    I think that generally I am not that bad in figuring people's motivations out, just.. know about the dynamics in a group (whom likes whom for what reason) but if I get emotionally involved it becomes pretty blurry and impossible to interpret a situation right.
    I also had people tell me, that I am interpreting things in situations where there wasn't anything and that I tend to accuse people of doing things they didn't intend to. (Although this only happened when my emotions are getting into it too, so, yeah, like I said it gets blurry) So I somehow find myself more comfortable with non human things like science or sth., because you can predict things without getting too involved. I also like to keep relationships shallow because of that, although I need real friendships or the relationship to a significant other to be really really deep. I just can't manage to do that easily. -
    I'm easily in tune with what people "are", or what they need and I can (to some extent) transform myself in what is needed.
    e.g.: I know someone is against refugees (I'm pretty pro refugees, I also did a bit of social work, helping them to learn german in my summerholidays) and I know that they like ..idk, chemistry, partying and cars. I would like chemistry and partying, and not like talking about cars. So what I will do is to try to focus the relationship more on the aspects that we are both having in common (chemistry and cars), I will let the person talk about cars but won't really say anything to it - but I will show interest in their interests- and I will try to avoid the refugees issue. But if it does come up I will tell them how I see the topic, why I think that it is bad to be against them but without trying to seek a heavy confrontation. So, Im trying to maintain the harmony, but I do have strong values which I will protect. If I see that I can't maintain a relationship because the other person tries to change my view aggressively I will simply leave that person. I guess that's also the reason it is hard to build a deep relationship with me, I'm very accepting and transformative but if I think that there are too many things you could fight about, I will just leave or get really unreachable for that person, because I'm not changing people, I'm just like, getting to know people and decidinq very quickly if I could let that person really know me or if it just isn't right, then I will be pretty nice but maintain my .."aloofness".

    I don't know what to add.. maybe.. okay, I think the above paragraphs would maybe indicate some sort of Ni/Fe?
    The thing is, I easily sense people who are using Ne in their top functions and I can really join their argumenting and theorizing (that thing is easier for me with Ne+Ti that with Ne+Fi but both works) and I find that pretty funny. Therefore I thought if I can easily get along with Ne doms I may be a Ne aux, so INTP or INFJ. Because I also sense people wo don't use Ne tht much and I have the feeling that these people also don't really get my humor or that it's difficult for me to really really have fun with them. Not that this wouldn't get along or something but just not on that fun level I have with others. But I do not think that I am a Ne dom because it's not that strong as I see it in other Ne doms (my two best friends are ENTP and ENFP)

    I'm having my problems with the intro/extro thing, As I was depressed and everything I was really really shy and needes so much alone time. But now I really can't tell since I started to really lke people and going out for drinks.
    But I don't find parties that fun, or maybe just for an hour until Im getting overwhelmed and want to go home.
    I prefer smaller group interactions; 4 to up to 10 people I know.

    I would really appreciate any insight, typing or anything else that maybe help me, thanks for reading and feel free to ask any questions!

  2. #2
    Senior Member wolfnara's Avatar
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    A Wall of text! I will try to break it down and explain what I think

    So, on the one hand I'm pretty helpful and just like people and like being sociable and all but I can also be very observant and intuitive. I have the feeling that I often just "get" people, I'm having gut feelings of whom I can trust (although I really need to work on trusting and going by them more, I just find myself mistrusting these bad feelings about people and then later on I see the mess) And I also somehow can premonitor in which a situation may be going. For example: I was having a small group of friends and I knew that because of former events, trouble may be caused. I tried to take steps to prevent that, talked to one person about that (and he was SO oblivious to it all, it hurt) the point was, he was so so oblivious to it and didn't understand me or wanted to understand me and then the thing which I thought would happen happened.
    Possibly an extrovert?
    Getting vibes from other people is subjective feeling ( Fi )
    Either Ni or Fi.

    I think that generally I am not that bad in figuring people's motivations out, just.. know about the dynamics in a group (whom likes whom for what reason) but if I get emotionally involved it becomes pretty blurry and impossible to interpret a situation right.
    I also had people tell me, that I am interpreting things in situations where there wasn't anything and that I tend to accuse people of doing things they didn't intend to. (Although this only happened when my emotions are getting into it too, so, yeah, like I said it gets blurry) So I somehow find myself more comfortable with non human things like science or sth., because you can predict things without getting too involved. I also like to keep relationships shallow because of that, although I need real friendships or the relationship to a significant other to be really really deep. I just can't manage to do that easily. -
    You seem interested in people and their feelings, and good at it too. This makes it hard to imagine you are a thinker.
    second part seems Ni or Fi again.

    i'm guessing INFP.
    "Those who do not move, do not notice their chains"
    -Rosa Luxemburg

  3. #3

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    Yes I'm very interested in things like that! I also can tell pretty easily why people do some things or Im not that unintelligent when it comes to general motives behind actions. e.g when people do bad things to others, it's never the person who gut hurt's fault, because you only hurt people if you have an inner conflict with yourself. But as I said it just confuses me if I get too involved.

    The thing why I don't know if I use Fi is, because I tend to soak up eotions. I'm the one who starts crying because people who I'm surrounded with are cyring or when a person I feel close to is hurt.

  4. #4
    Senior Member wolfnara's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lume View Post
    Yes I'm very interested in things like that! I also can tell pretty easily why people do some things or Im not that unintelligent when it comes to general motives behind actions. e.g when people do bad things to others, it's never the person who gut hurt's fault, because you only hurt people if you have an inner conflict with yourself. But as I said it just confuses me if I get too involved.

    The thing why I don't know if I use Fi is, because I tend to soak up eotions. I'm the one who starts crying because people who I'm surrounded with are cyring or when a person I feel close to is hurt.
    You believe you might be an FJ / Fe type?
    As an FP I am very affected by other people too, and I also seem aware of how other people's emotions affect mine. Yet I value Fi more than Fe.
    You mentioned you get gut feelings about people which determines how much trust you have towards them. Can I ask, how to reach that conclusion? What is is it about the person that gives you that feeling? It is purely a gut feeling or is it based on their outward expression or appearance?
    "Those who do not move, do not notice their chains"
    -Rosa Luxemburg

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by wolfnara View Post
    You believe you might be an FJ / Fe type?
    As an FP I am very affected by other people too, and I also seem aware of how other people's emotions affect mine. Yet I value Fi more than Fe.
    You mentioned you get gut feelings about people which determines how much trust you have towards them. Can I ask, how to reach that conclusion? What is is it about the person that gives you that feeling? It is purely a gut feeling or is it based on their outward expression or appearance?
    Yeah I'm not sure, I was just leaning more towards Fe but I could be Fi also.

    That's so funny because I have a really really bad eyesight ( -18 dpt.) and I was meeting a girl once without having my glasses on and I really couldn't tell what I should think of her.
    But I'm surely not going by looks only, I just think that I value gestic, mimic and tone of voice and I really don't like meeting people I know only from writing because of that, like, I need to get used to the way a person speeks, acts, lifts or lowers their voice.
    The feeling is just.. it's that I feel comfortable or uncomfortable around someone. And I often think that I wouldn't need to feel uncomfortable around someone because there's no logical reasom behind it (so I often ignored it but as I said Im working on that)
    It's also hard for me to overcome this once I know someone better, Iike I just feel pretty pretty bad when I'm e.g going to grab lunch with them or things like that. But I think I really do can trust these feelings, because it really often turned out to be a right bad feeling afterwards.

  6. #6
    Senior Member wolfnara's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lume View Post
    Yeah I'm not sure, I was just leaning more towards Fe but I could be Fi also.

    That's so funny because I have a really really bad eyesight ( -18 dpt.) and I was meeting a girl once without having my glasses on and I really couldn't tell what I should think of her.
    But I'm surely not going by looks only, I just think that I value gestic, mimic and tone of voice and I really don't like meeting people I know only from writing because of that, like, I need to get used to the way a person speeks, acts, lifts or lowers their voice.
    The feeling is just.. it's that I feel comfortable or uncomfortable around someone. And I often think that I wouldn't need to feel uncomfortable around someone because there's no logical reasom behind it (so I often ignored it but as I said Im working on that)
    It's also hard for me to overcome this once I know someone better, Iike I just feel pretty pretty bad when I'm e.g going to grab lunch with them or things like that. But I think I really do can trust these feelings, because it really often turned out to be a right bad feeling afterwards.
    Perhaps this could be useful;
    Fi
    Fe
    (Socionics is a similar system to MBTI, but the function descriptions are very similar, and personally I prefer them. Once you get past the phrases used it might help you understand or relate to Fi/Fe).

    The description under the "leading" title is the equivalent for the dominant function in MBTI, and "creative" is auxiliary.
    "Those who do not move, do not notice their chains"
    -Rosa Luxemburg

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