Okay, so It sounds like you are interested and entertained by going against everything.
I have Marxist, Anarchist & Communist friends, most of whom are ENTP.
Regardless you seem to be ENTP, your enneagram most likely 8 some degree of 6 maybe.
You may have a spot of OCD or ADHD. I cannot tell through this medium.
You are higher on the scale of narcissism than you would readily like to admit.
You can be absolutely narcissistic without actually being a true narcissist.
Narcissistic is just another way of saying the "Self" is more important than anyone or anything.
Which is not good. Because you live in a world.. filled with other people.
You appear to enjoy your dominance over others. You probably have some very strange romantic relations.
You would push boundaries. You would left unchecked likely become sadistic. You would be ultimately unhappy, with no sense of self, as you have displayed here.
You can change that. You would already say "I Know". Well, with knowledge comes responsibility.
Actual narcissists take a great deal of action to manipulate people into where they want them emotionally or strategically..
I think you probably, as you admitted, have some work to put into yourself..
Admit who you are and decide who you want to be. Galavanting through MBTI Types or life for that matter leaves you with no connection to anything.
I do get an "Unruly Child" vibe from you. I almost wanted to ask your age and make sure you were not 16 or something.
Even though to the contrary you mentioned a college advisor...
I just took some of those tests based on the facts presented by everyone as well as from reading my text.
MBTI - I got ENTJ with everything moderate-strong (I can't believe I am this malleable, just moments ago I was throwing my dice for ENTP)
Enneagram Tritype - 4w3 - 5w6 - 8w7 (seems the secondary ego type and the tertiary Id type matches the top hypothesis. Maybe the test was biased toward the 4 type as the superego type? Although given that I do not have any friends and especially given that I never was able to find anyone who is similar to myself, perhaps the ENTJ 4w3 demon unicorn as my type is more likely?)
Instinctual Variant - Sp/So (Sx is two points lower than So, and Sp is about 10 points higher than the rest, seems to fit well with the prevalent insight)
So, what is left for me to do:
(1) Find some examples of the existence of this...demon unicorn creature, if any. So if anyone knows any TV, film, book, or videogame character or famous person who resembles me or the current agreed on type, I will be most grateful (don't get too cozy, I am still an ungrateful person)
(2) Using a brilliant technological toy that I like to call the Typeanalytic "blog buster" I will post bits and pieces, and combinations of text I wrote here onto a top secret blog where the blog buster will read and tear the blog apart for clues as to my true type by looking for my writing style, mannerisms, word choice, etc.
(3) Do something about my nerves, I would clearly see ENTJ in myself if I was not such a nervous mess, so off to researching herbs/medication/tools to relieve stress (I really wish I had access to a Jacuzzi)
(4) Self exploration should never end, if anybody can add on to the amazing skyscraper that is being built here, that would be great. I will probably check out the miscellaneous test section of the forum.
I would like to thank Mal12345 and small.wonder for digging the deepest ditch for me to lie in. Sincere thanks to everyone else for trying, but I am not inviting you to lunch so...(think Robert California, I really got obsessed with him thanks to this forum)
You're welcome! Does this mean you're buying small.wonder and me lunch? Or not?
"I absorb energy like a sponge everywhere I go. It allows me to see the world and my purpose in it." Zak Bagans, Ghost Adventures (INFJ)
@Evee - Maybe...until I take over the world.
@oneandonly - Judging from what I experienced on the outside world and on this forum, I have no choice but to produce the conclusion that I am the only being in the whole universe that INFJs in general, genuinely hate (I many be the perfect paragon of the four horsemen of the apocalypse, but come on)...they just don't want to admit it. Easier to deem the malcontent insane than admit that even they feel some level of resentment towards some people (not all INFJ, but I have a 99% success rate at infuriating them, the 1% refers to a good friend of mine whose energetic nature makes me think of him as ENFJ). Oh and I never asked anyone to call me upstairs from the underworld, I was having so much fun torturing souls and smoking weed with my bestie the new King of Hell (his name is Crowley, I do not refer to Lucifer, now that guy has some daddy issues, Crowley's got style). Nope, never had romantic relationships, other than the girl during senior year who kept saying I was her boyfriend. She was a bit nuts, I had some people look into her a bit and they concluded that she was obsessed with my influential nature...so yea, not a romantic. As I mentioned before, today-land is bad for people like me, back in the goodoldays it was so simple, as was human nature. Obey, or rebel were the two buttons in the single-player version of prisoner's dilemma and each had their pros and cons depending on the situation. I strategically pick Obey/Rebel. I rebel against my family because I see them as weak and ineffective (my grandfather gave up his post as second in command in a Ukrainian Aviation firm because my mother was sick and because he wanted to come to the US, where we had nobody, no friends, no allies, no knowledge of the language, no luck, everyone in my family became home attendants and their lack of care about their poverty infuriated me as the days rolled by. However, the change was beneficial, instead of being pampered (we left for the US when I was very young) I grew up on level one and have worked my way up until I became a student body leader in my senior year of high school...then I graduated, and yes my psyche suffered severely from my fall from grace, I felt betrayed even though I really wasn't) Anyway, long rant...I was very obedient in school, especially high school because I respected the teachers and Administrators (T types mostly) and I was blasted away by their passion and knowledge. I never once was suspended, called out for talking, sent to detention or the deans office, I was the perfect student...a little too perfect (eyes suddenly glow red). That means no ADHD. (I do have some level of OCD) I am 19, just turned 19 on 9/11 (no joke, seriously).
@phobic - you mean...blessing...don't you? (INTJ death stare initiated)
@Mal12345 - Well...I hope you're ok with "gluten free baby uvulas" -Crowley (I couldn't resist it...it just fits) Anyway, seems the INFJs are banding together against the current prevailing typing (what irony, they claim I'm rebelling...talk about the pot calling the kettle back) ENTP vs ENTJ it is... 3w4/4w3 vs 8wDEVIL...and it seems sp or sp/so it is. I smell an epic showdown...now its off to the sewer for me until the surface world cools down. (that makes me sound like a troll doesn't it?)
@small.wonder - well...what is a winner? (looks up on google) "a card that can be relied on to win a trick" -google...so yes, you guys are winners.
@phobik - sorry, for misspelling your name in the above post...(stares evilly at auto spell)
I actually dont hate you. That is just not a feeling I get from words on forum. However, I'm being bluntly honest with no bias... there is a marked propensity if you think in linear terms for the characteristics you describe to become what I mention.. almost like a natural evolution unless something acts upon it... its just potential.. probability.. I'm not hating you. Itd take a lot for me to. Although Id never date you... you think too much.
I really appreciate my ENTP friend Matt he is a marxist poet.. outspoken against the grain loud as all hell, and defiant.. although he tries to respect rules in social situations. He might piss me off on occasion but i love him.
When I was 19 I had PTSD. I was completely detached from myself. It took me 10 years a A failed relationship, Death & Love and a lot of loss to truly get myself.
The last part of the puzzle was trusting and recognizing my vast intuition.. A part of myself I was told wasnt reality or concrete.
The point is.. take a deep breath.. its all good... even if it is not all good.. everything is temporary..
Accept yourself as you are at every turn, whether some emotion or situation or obsessive amounts of thinking overtakes you, whether you feel like a bad friend, whatever, accept every dark corner of yourself...
Its temporary as shit. Shit is temporary. Fuck it, do your best whatever it is that you do, and be happy with who you are. We cannot all be Idealists, We cant all be Rational, We cannot all be Visionary, We cant all be Sages.. But please, do be, the best whatever the fuck you are!!
I mean that very positively, I just enjoy the emphasis cursing brings to language.
@oneandonly - hmmm...you may be right, I am just used to dismissing INFJs in real life because I see many of them as brilliant people who have directed their brilliance in the wrong direction, and even when I accept their direction, they still continue to push me down their "idealistic" path if that fails (that always fails) they label me inhuman and insane. I'm not saying its necessarily anyone on this forum (although I do get a gut feeling based on some of the comments) but that was just my experience. I'm not fully a Marxist or communist (I tend to take a bit of what I consider logical out of every belief and ideology). Joseph Stalin was a member of the Communist Party and became the leader of the Soviet Union...was he Marxist/Communist? I doubt it on a ideological level. He took bits and pieces of Leninism and Marxism as well as 70% of his own ideals and created an impenetrable stronghold behind an iron fence (curtain)...now that sounds like me...joining a cause that I see will triumph and waiting for the right time to seize the reigns and make my own vision possible. I am actually better at business talk then my ISTP mom, I usually act all ENTP at home, playful, laid back, jovial. Once I'm out there...in the cruel and merciless world...If I act like that, I will loose everything, freedom is my true life, everything else is death to me. My estranged grandfather (who is an INFJ) always used to say that everything will change for the better. He was only right once...In the end, I accept only my strength or at the very least the persistence to become strong. Accepting or rather living with what I deem as faults was never who I am, I must improve, except that improvement in my world, is success....................(brain blast) 3w4 is my enneagram, success is the very foundation of a 3 type, even if success refers to my own definition of it. I accept my strong qualities and focus on them (4 type) but never accept what I deem as my weak characteristics (not 4 type) So 3w4 it is for my enneagram.......thanks oneandonly.
@all I actually found some very good examples of a discussion on ENTJ 3w4 after looking for a few minutes on the web:
I have to say it fits me rather well. "Work will always be their #1 priority, while the rest of the family resents them. They may as well be ATMs at home, when they are there that is. The funny part is they would be totally okay with that." -MelanieM (...that (and the majority of the other posts on ENTJ 3w4) is so...so...so...accurate dead on, hit the nail, shot the target. I loved my High School leadership position, never wanted to go home to my "family" and if I did, it was only in the late evening to play videogames, and sleep. I even made an effort to attend weekend events at my school where the organization I worked with was involved. Life was just swell back then.
@In conclusion ENTJ 3w4 sp (hahaha...sorry, just thought of a Gameboy joke) going once...going twice.................