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  1. #31
    brainheart
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    Eight: I have a fear of vulnerability. There have been times where I've shown my vulnerable side to others and then been dropped by them. I try to avoid that as much as possible. However, as a sexual four what I want more than anything is to share my vulnerable side. Therefore, my reluctance to share my vulnerability feels like a real hurdle. I tend to oscillate between sharing too much and sharing too little. I'm a Cancer and I've always related to the concept of the crab shell- having this seeming layer of impermeability but being extremely squishy on the inside. I have a hard time with psychiatrists/therapists because I don't share with them. Obviously, as a four I withdraw to protect my feelings, but I really protect my feelings in these situations. Also, I feel like I need to handle things myself, and so asking a therapist what to do/ putting my life in their hands feels like failure. It seems to me like all of this could also be explained by my five wing.

    I hate the idea of being controlled in any way. I don't have a job because I can't stand living my life to meet the ends of others. I am my own boss. The only way I will make money is independently. I would rather be broke than have to work for someone else.

    Nine: I often feel like I disappear, like I overly go with the flow of life and then my needs aren't met. I'm not good at initiating and I'm not good at completing. It seems like years can pass in the blink of an eye and I have very little to show for it. I'm not all that aggressive at getting what I want. The exception would be those I'm attracted to. Then I get aggressive.

  2. #32
    So she did. small.wonder's Avatar
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    @brainheart

    I tend to think of 9 as the most dreamy, and 1 as more practical about their idealism-- 1w9 is actually called the idealist I believe (where 9w1 is the Dreamer).

    Hmm. You've given a lot of great examples, and I can see why you are torn. Your sentiment about not liking the idea of killing/eating animals (but continuing to somewhat) says not 8 to me because of the emphasis on survival. I'm a huge animal lover, but I've always been a carnivore. Even in adulthood, I've not thought twice about it because the whole "circle of life" thing makes sense to me. My brother is 682 and we've had conversations about this, he's a butcher at a farm-to-table, organic restaurant group and sees the process as beautiful. He highly respects the animal, knows all about it's breed, heritage, the way it was raised and uses every part-- in a very native American way, if that helps explain. I feel much the same. I would chalk some of that up to our family culture and upbringing, but even so that may be a large part of why we are both 8-fixed.

    This is truly the tricky part about tritype, because you are not 8, 9 or 1 so you won't fit the description fully-- you just lean more toward one than the others. I'm going to PM you the short tests for 8, 9 and 1 from The Wisdom of the Enneagram (unless you have it?). Let me know and I'll send those your way.
    Find my Enneagram writing here. Also, I'd love for you to take my six question Enneagram surveyEnneagram survey!✨

  3. #33
    So she did. small.wonder's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    Eight: I have a fear of vulnerability. There have been times where I've shown my vulnerable side to others and then been dropped by them. I try to avoid that as much as possible. However, as a sexual four what I want more than anything is to share my vulnerable side. Therefore, my reluctance to share my vulnerability feels like a real hurdle. I tend to oscillate between sharing too much and sharing too little. I'm a Cancer and I've always related to the concept of the crab shell- having this seeming layer of impermeability but being extremely squishy on the inside. I have a hard time with psychiatrists/therapists because I don't share with them. Obviously, as a four I withdraw to protect my feelings, but I really protect my feelings in these situations. Also, I feel like I need to handle things myself, and so asking a therapist what to do/ putting my life in their hands feels like failure. It seems to me like all of this could also be explained by my five wing.

    I hate the idea of being controlled in any way. I don't have a job because I can't stand living my life to meet the ends of others. I am my own boss. The only way I will make money is independently. I would rather be broke than have to work for someone else.

    Nine: I often feel like I disappear, like I overly go with the flow of life and then my needs aren't met. I'm not good at initiating and I'm not good at completing. It seems like years can pass in the blink of an eye and I have very little to show for it. I'm not all that aggressive at getting what I want. The exception would be those I'm attracted to. Then I get aggressive.
    I can relate a ton to the bolded, which I think stems from Sx first 4w5 with a 5 fix. Not sure about the rest, but I do think a 9 fix is a possability (especially since that would mean w8 or w1, which would explain why you are so torn here).
    Find my Enneagram writing here. Also, I'd love for you to take my six question Enneagram surveyEnneagram survey!✨

  4. #34
    Undisciplined Starry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    I don't feel like I'm very good at keeping mindful of purpose. I hate the idea of being told what to do/ controlled, but I suck at staying the course.
    I'm not quite sure how you are defining purpose here. But then...I'm no longer sure how I was/am defining it either haha. I know it had nothing to do with 'staying on course' in the physical reality...or practical/material sense. I know I'm not explaining this well so I will leave it to another day...but I'm merely referring to an individual that...more often than not... possesses a reason to act over 'not act.' <-Unfortunately this fix is not enough to make us totally not lazy haha.



    How so?
    Merely because I had some vague understanding that this was something I did...and so to discover it was an actual trait stunned me into thinking..."great another thing I can no longer deny."

  5. #35
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by small.wonder View Post
    @brainheart

    I tend to think of 9 as the most dreamy, and 1 as more practical about their idealism-- 1w9 is actually called the idealist I believe (where 9w1 is the Dreamer).

    Hmm. You've given a lot of great examples, and I can see why you are torn. Your sentiment about not liking the idea of killing/eating animals (but continuing to somewhat) says not 8 to me because of the emphasis on survival. I'm a huge animal lover, but I've always been a carnivore. Even in adulthood, I've not thought twice about it because the whole "circle of life" thing makes sense to me. My brother is 682 and we've had conversations about this, he's a butcher at a farm-to-table, organic restaurant group and sees the process as beautiful. He highly respects the animal, knows all about it's breed, heritage, the way it was raised and uses every part-- in a very native American way, if that helps explain. I feel much the same. I would chalk some of that up to our family culture and upbringing, but even so that may be a large part of why we are both 8-fixed.

    This is truly the tricky part about tritype, because you are not 8, 9 or 1 so you won't fit the description fully-- you just lean more toward one than the others. I'm going to PM you the short tests for 8, 9 and 1 from The Wisdom of the Enneagram (unless you have it?). Let me know and I'll send those your way.
    I actually totally agree with the bolded. But I know this is not how most animals are raised/used, hence the problem. You know, it's funny because as a kid we had cows and when we ate one of our cows I had little to no qualms about it because I knew it had a good life. I feel more this way eating wild caught fish and wild game. I want an animal to have a fighting chance and animals whose sole purpose is to be eaten do not. That's what bothers me. I should point out that Ernest Hemingway was one of my favorite writers when younger and most of his writing is about this relationship. I actually feel a strong connection to the guy, but it's more like what he does externally I do internally, if that makes sense. That said, I don't think I could bring myself to kill an animal myself and in that way it feels wrong for me to eat them (that's right I said wrong). I mean I could if I had to, but I'd rather not. I'd feel really bad. I mean, I can't even kill bugs. If I accidentally step on one I feel awful.

    I feel the need to point out that I am a Fi-dom. Fi has a very one-ish tinge to it which I think confuses things. While you may be right about being nine and that's why I see both one and eight in myself, it could also be the Fi dominance talking, or the Fi/Te relationship.

    Thanks for the PM

  6. #36
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starry View Post
    I'm not quite sure how you are defining purpose here. But then...I'm no longer sure how I was/am defining it either haha. I know it had nothing to do with 'staying on course' in the physical reality...or practical/material sense. I know I'm not explaining this well so I will leave it to another day...but I'm merely referring to an individual that...more often than not... possesses a reason to act over 'not act.' <-Unfortunately this fix is not enough to make us totally not lazy haha.





    Merely because I had some vague understanding that this was something I did...and so to discover it was an actual trait stunned me into thinking..."great another thing I can no longer deny."
    Ok. So there's the inner flame within vs no inner flame?

  7. #37
    Undisciplined Starry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    Ok. So there's the inner flame within vs no inner flame?
    Umm... an inner force that says "I know it...you know it...the entire world knows...that you aren't leaving your neo-classical poetry book and spot by the fireplace... but regardless of what your outward behavior wishes to tell us otherwise...you still value of action over inaction."

    ^^haha no I'm just kidding.

    8 values action based on an internal set of values
    9 values inaction
    1 values action or inaction based on a collectively agreed upon (traditional) external structure

  8. #38
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    hmmm i see why you struggle between the two brainheart...it's tricky. my "guess" is for 478 tho. i wouldn't put a lot of stock in it tho if i can't even determine my own haha
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  9. #39
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starry View Post

    8 values action based on an internal set of values
    9 values inaction
    1 values action or inaction based on a collectively agreed upon (traditional) external structure
    I definitely value action based on an internal set of values but I tend to operate in a state of inaction. Ach, the struggle.


    @Lady_X thanks for the two cents. Tritype is so... argh... isn't it?

  10. #40
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    I definitely value action based on an internal set of values but I tend to operate in a state of inaction. Ach, the struggle.
    @Lady_X thanks for the two cents. Tritype is so... argh... isn't it?
    totally...and i guess our lack of clarity stems from not knowing how it even functions. like maybe we'd know if we knew what ways to expect to notice an eight gut fix in a core 4 or 7 etc etc we need to start with this i guess.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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