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  1. #1
    Senior Member
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    Default I Thought I was INTJ . . .

    For three years I've been INTJ. I've done online tests, had a MBTI friend confirm it, my Sloan and wing-type seem to match up, I can relate to the cognitive function discussions. There are a few discrepancies - I'm not confident (much less arrogant), I don't have the INTJ stare, I'm not into math/science, don't play chess. But I'm female, the argument goes, and society has forced me to tone down so as to be non-arrogant, and it's stereotypical to think that all INTJ's are going to be into math/science. I accepted that logic and I've assumed I'm simply not a stereotypical INTJ. The rest of the description fits and I've enjoying lurking on the INTJf forum.

    A friend who is MBTI certified is telling me I'm INTP. At first I balked because I've confirmed INTJ so many times. But as she went on with her reasoning, it started to make more sense.

    Here are the reasons I think I'm INTJ
    Strong j - I love organizing (though I'm not so good at maintaining that organization) and I feel unsettled with a decision that's not made yet. I have been guilty of making a bad decision just to get something finalized.
    I write in short, brief statements. The INTP style is to carefully define terms and thoroughly explain every facet. I like a direct and concise style of communicating.
    I relate strongly to Fi (no, I am not INFP)
    I do not like progressive music. INTP's have broader tastes in music than I do.
    I like to do big projects - organize information, clarify things to make it accessible to others, clean and organize closets.
    The whole "up in the air" aspect of not being sure of my type gnaws at me. Isn't that J?

    Reasons I might be INTP
    I am always doubting myself
    I have not "known I was smarter than everyone else" ever since I was a kid like INTJ's are supposed to. In fact, I'm not exceptionally smart. People I know in real life define me as "smart", but amongst groups of people who read, I'm nothing extraordinary in the intelligence department.
    I'm nicer than INTJ's are supposed to be. I may be distant and oblivious to what others are going through, and people may assume I'm cold and aloof, but I aspire to be caring.
    I don't like debating. I like hearing contrary ideas about things when it's backed up by logic, but being yelled at unsettles me. If I was in a heated debate, I'd probably get flustered and cry.

    My friend reasoned it like this:
    People are either Directing or Informing (this us Linda Berens' explanation of types). I am not Directing. In a crowd, I say very little. When I do speak, I ask questions (informing) rather than make statements (Directing). I like philosophy (my long-term goal is to finish all my projects so I can spend the rest of my life buried in philosophy textbooks and Descartes and Mill and such in order to simply relish following their thought processes) and she says that confirms INTP. If I was INTJ, I would be drawn to math and science. And, although I like making lists and schedules and organizing stuff, I have trouble with follow-through.

    Can you help me out, please?

  2. #2
    Senior Member animenagai's Avatar
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    Default

    My advice is to figure out what your top functions are. Don't get caught up on stereo-typology. Things like "INTJ's like math and science" are a very crude way of typing. It the Jungian functions that create substance in MBTI, and the same functions can be expressed in very different ways.

    To be honest with you, I think your MBTI-certified friend is misleading you more than anything.
    Chimera of Filth

    A gruesome beast with dripping flesh
    Clings to me as a sick fixture
    My throbbing heart it gnawed apart
    It stalks and hunts me through mirrors

  3. #3
    ndovjtjcaqidthi
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    Lol @ bringing "INTJ stare" into this.

  4. #4
    LadyLazarus
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    Well all thoughts we was INTJ at some point.

  5. #5
    morose bourgeoisie
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    NEITHER
    THIRD OPTION

  6. #6
    Member maybetmp's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tsunderes View Post
    Well all thoughts we was INTJ at some point.
    Even though I did think I might be an INTJ at one point, I kind of have to doubt that.

  7. #7
    ndovjtjcaqidthi
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stanton Moore View Post
    NEITHER
    THIRD OPTION
    INFP?

    Welcome back, by the way.

  8. #8
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    I see little reason at least in the OP to shy from INTJ. IxFJs especially do tend to be socially directive but all IxxJs are dominant Perceivers even though they are Js. It is not at all unusual for IxxJs to ask questions in a social context. A more telling difference would be whether your thought process tends to focus on one domain and orient everything at that domain for periods of time (Pi/J), or whether it tends to jump and loop in response to the real-time external environment (Pe/P). As far as external organization goes, again, INTJs are primary Perceivers, and their primary focus is internal, not external. The strongest argument against INTJ that I see is that you're unsettled as to your type, but like you said, maybe you're just further from average.

    Whether you like philosophy or math and science has little to do with anything.

  9. #9
    LadyLazarus
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    Quote Originally Posted by maybetmp View Post
    Even though I did think I might be an INTJ at one point, I kind of have to doubt that.
    But I'm clearly the most reliable source there is.

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    A more telling difference would be whether your thought process tends to focus on one domain and orient everything at that domain for periods of time (Pi/J), or whether it tends to jump and loop in response to the real-time external environment (Pe/P). As far as external organization goes, again, INTJs are primary Perceivers, and their primary focus is internal, not external.
    As in, does my thought process tend to get obsessed with one topic and exclude irrelevant data? In reading an INTP forum, it seems that INTPs tend to go off on random rabbit trails. Perhaps it's because I've learned self-discipline, but I don't really do that. When I'm on a subject, I'm pretty focused and generally ignore rabbit trails.

    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    The strongest argument against INTJ that I see is that you're unsettled as to your type, but like you said, maybe you're just further from average.
    Further from average in what?

    At this point, I think my main doubt that I can't get past is that I'm mousy and timid and very unassuming. My understanding is that an INTJ's defining characteristic is confidence, at least in what they know.

    So I'm either an INTJ with low self-esteem or an INTP with unusual focus.

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