For three years I've been INTJ. I've done online tests, had a MBTI friend confirm it, my Sloan and wing-type seem to match up, I can relate to the cognitive function discussions. There are a few discrepancies - I'm not confident (much less arrogant), I don't have the INTJ stare, I'm not into math/science, don't play chess. But I'm female, the argument goes, and society has forced me to tone down so as to be non-arrogant, and it's stereotypical to think that all INTJ's are going to be into math/science. I accepted that logic and I've assumed I'm simply not a stereotypical INTJ. The rest of the description fits and I've enjoying lurking on the INTJf forum.
A friend who is MBTI certified is telling me I'm INTP. At first I balked because I've confirmed INTJ so many times. But as she went on with her reasoning, it started to make more sense.
Here are the reasons I think I'm INTJ
Strong j - I love organizing (though I'm not so good at maintaining that organization) and I feel unsettled with a decision that's not made yet. I have been guilty of making a bad decision just to get something finalized.
I write in short, brief statements. The INTP style is to carefully define terms and thoroughly explain every facet. I like a direct and concise style of communicating.
I relate strongly to Fi (no, I am not INFP)
I do not like progressive music. INTP's have broader tastes in music than I do.
I like to do big projects - organize information, clarify things to make it accessible to others, clean and organize closets.
The whole "up in the air" aspect of not being sure of my type gnaws at me. Isn't that J?
Reasons I might be INTP
I am always doubting myself
I have not "known I was smarter than everyone else" ever since I was a kid like INTJ's are supposed to. In fact, I'm not exceptionally smart. People I know in real life define me as "smart", but amongst groups of people who read, I'm nothing extraordinary in the intelligence department.
I'm nicer than INTJ's are supposed to be. I may be distant and oblivious to what others are going through, and people may assume I'm cold and aloof, but I aspire to be caring.
I don't like debating. I like hearing contrary ideas about things when it's backed up by logic, but being yelled at unsettles me. If I was in a heated debate, I'd probably get flustered and cry.
My friend reasoned it like this:
People are either Directing or Informing (this us Linda Berens' explanation of types). I am not Directing. In a crowd, I say very little. When I do speak, I ask questions (informing) rather than make statements (Directing). I like philosophy (my long-term goal is to finish all my projects so I can spend the rest of my life buried in philosophy textbooks and Descartes and Mill and such in order to simply relish following their thought processes) and she says that confirms INTP. If I was INTJ, I would be drawn to math and science. And, although I like making lists and schedules and organizing stuff, I have trouble with follow-through.
Can you help me out, please?