INFJ, INFP or something else? help :(

[Doctor Cringelord]

Listen to [MENTION=10984]DJ Arendee[/MENTION]'s description of Fi/Te badasses vs Fe/Ti badasses. Yes, I know this video is about ISFP vs INFJ rather than INFP vs INFJ...

 

[Azure Flame]

omg an infj 2!

tell me more

 

[Hypatia]

DJ, you killed this thread. *Revives*

 

[Hypatia]

I wonder how cultural background could impact what these functions could "mean."

 

[Concur_Withall]

You're probably one or the other. INFJ and INFP are very similar as one is Fi>Ni and the other is Ni>Fi (note: my view here is unconventional, as MBTI puts the second functions as extroverted, which I'm pretty sure now is wrong). I don't know much about Fi dominants, but I know that I am Ni dominant, and so are many people I know.

I would go with Ni>Fi. I don't see a Fi dominant being described as having a "man's brain", but I can see there being a societal bias, where the "genius" Ni is seen as masculine for whatever reason. I call this an INFP because Ni dom has well differentiated perceptive abilities, but MBTI calls it INFJ, so it's confusing. There are a few comments you make that scream Ni at me.

 

[lume]

Imo Fe is not being sensitive but it is showing emotion. I would say Fi is a much more sensitive function and has a greater depth of emotion than Fe does. Fi feels very strongly and has a strong sense of personal moral values. I think Fe is more outwardly sensitive but Fi is truly sensitive. If you personally insult someone with Fe thy will most likely just think to themselves “you’re a jerk” and won’t bother with you in the future. If that person used Fi they’d probably respond in a very volatile way.



Fi does care for people outside of their loved ones the way its shown is just different. Fi is more authentic than Fe so the way in which they care is not readily apparent or is less traditional. I don’t think Fi is cold as much as it is not outwardly expressive.



This example sounds more like sensing with a little bit of F of some kind. I don’t think Ni Fe is so focused on the social rules or laws for the sake of themselves. I feel they’d be more concerned with the reason behind the social rules or the bigger picture. Ex lying isn’t socially acceptable because it hurts other people. It’s the recognition of how it affects others around you not just the fact that it is not socially acceptable.



This doesn’t sound like Fi as much as it sounds like Fe door slamming. Fe is good at managing people. Introverts with Fe who are very selective of who they let into their lives do exactly what you described. It really sounds like classic behavior of someone who is introverted and uses Fe.

Right now I’d Say INFJ or ISFJ. Im leaning more toward Isfj. In your responses you seemed to focus on traditional themes and regulations. Perhaps you should look into Si vs Se.

I have heard it a few times that as a child I behaved as a typical sensor, but Im not sure if thats the way it really is. I had the feeling that I was pushed into this role, I simply had to act that kind of way, making sure everything is organised, everything is under my control. Because otherwise no one would have done things like this. As I said I had to remind my mom of my doctors appointments (all the time, its like I had to force her to the telephone, making the calls because otherwise she would forgot) and I also was responsible for getting up at the right time in the morning, being punctual and so on. (Im probably an sp variant, whichever enneagram I might be)

I dont know if Im a sensor, could be. But Im good at understanding theories and making them up. Like I see some events and then I connect it. When someone I know behaves weird I make up a thousand theories for the cause. Often pickung up things that are in no actual connection with a weird behaviour, but I just start theorizing. My boyfriend said I often pick up on things and draw it together and it just makes no sense. And thats true I guess.

I dont think that Im using Si, really not. Im ahving a hard time remembering experiences, even when they were important. I do remember some things, but I also forget much.

And with Fe Im also not sure. Ive got the weakest people skills ever, I often embarass myself around groups, I dont think about what Im saying, I sometimes hurt people with saying stupid things. It sometimes just comes out my mouth and it doesnt stop
I feel that I sould be a lot more tactless if I used Fe. I do follow the rules, and maybe adhere to shared values, but I think I do this because I get so terribly guilty if I made a mistake and someone is mad at me.


Whats also really typical about me is that, in others, I look for things to like or to dislike. If I see someone being mmean or anything I will soak that impression in, and I wont like them. Until I see taht person making a good thing. So my thoughts about people tend to differ a lot.

If I get to know someone I usually first like them, but as Im spending more time with them I begin to see the flaws and these are often ones I cant bear. So I start ignoring such people.

Maybe that helps?

 

[iNtrovert]

I have heard it a few times that as a child I behaved as a typical sensor, but Im not sure if thats the way it really is. I had the feeling that I was pushed into this role, I simply had to act that kind of way, making sure everything is organised, everything is under my control. Because otherwise no one would have done things like this. As I said I had to remind my mom of my doctors appointments (all the time, its like I had to force her to the telephone, making the calls because otherwise she would forgot) and I also was responsible for getting up at the right time in the morning, being punctual and so on. (Im probably an sp variant, whichever enneagram I might be)

I dont know if Im a sensor, could be. But Im good at understanding theories and making them up. Like I see some events and then I connect it. When someone I know behaves weird I make up a thousand theories for the cause. Often pickung up things that are in no actual connection with a weird behaviour, but I just start theorizing. My boyfriend said I often pick up on things and draw it together and it just makes no sense. And thats true I guess.

This sounds like weak Ne. Which makes me think you are an Isfj even more. Intuitive doms or aux will make sense of the all the theorizing. I'm leaning more towards weak Ne than Ni because Ni uses intuition to narrow down possibilities and Ne expands them. From you example you seem to be expanding possibilities. I'd shy away from INFJ simply because they are Ni dom. The things they process with their intuition need to make sense more often than not as that is their dom function. They are also more focused on finding the best fit solution not expanding upon possibilities as you described yourself doing.

I dont think that Im using Si, really not. Im ahving a hard time remembering experiences, even when they were important. I do remember some things, but I also forget much.

Si deals more with memory of detail not the experience in general. I would't rule out Si all together based on your memory.

And with Fe Im also not sure. Ive got the weakest people skills ever, I often embarass myself around groups, I dont think about what Im saying, I sometimes hurt people with saying stupid things. It sometimes just comes out my mouth and it doesnt stop
I feel that I sould be a lot more tactless if I used Fe. I do follow the rules, and maybe adhere to shared values, but I think I do this because I get so terribly guilty if I made a mistake and someone is mad at me.

That is Fe. Introverts with Fe can still be prone to social awkwardness. Fe is a decision function above all else. It makes decisions by weighting its effect on other people. Fi does not do that. Fi makes a decision based on a subjective moral framework. If Fi is doing what they know is right based on that framework they’re not going to particularly care if someone is mad at them. They might even be offended that the other person doesn't understand their unique point of view. They focus on authenticity. They must be true to themselves regardless of outside opinions. In addition F can be (not always) kind of oblivious to what those social rules even are. Many Fi users express frustration with being expected to navigate the social world of Fe. You seem to know what they are and take care to adhere to them which leads me to believe you use Fe.

Whats also really typical about me is that, in others, I look for things to like or to dislike. If I see someone being mmean or anything I will soak that impression in, and I wont like them. Until I see taht person making a good thing. So my thoughts about people tend to differ a lot.

If I get to know someone I usually first like them, but as Im spending more time with them I begin to see the flaws and these are often ones I cant bear. So I start ignoring such people.

Don't all people do that? That just sounds like the basic process of getting to know someone. This is also coming from a Fe user so yea lol. Let me ask you this how you decide if you even want to give someone a chance in the first place. How do you know you want to begin this process of getting to know them assuming you had a choice.

 

[Anna Jorovic]

Hello guys, this is my second thread in this forum if thats something I should mention.
I made a thread earlier and I thought I could actually pin me down to INFJ (2w1). But after watching my behaviour lately Im not sure anymore.

I would just tell why I think I am an INFJ and why not or at least I will try to put this in a proper structure
I dont think that I fully understand Ni, but I think Ni wants to find every hidden meaning, going into great depths - thats totally appliable for me, (we had a parent conference day lately and every teacher said that Im very smart and that I want to know everything, asking a lot of (very good) questions, one teacher even said that its a joy to have me in his class because I often point out views on an issue that are right but the teacher himself hadnt thought about before)
Another teacher told me that she thinks that my brain functions like a mans brain (Im a 17-year old girl btw ) and that my questions are really analytic and logic. And so do I, I think Im very analytic, and my brain is thinking all the time.

Im really into things like science, Id like to study chemistry and things alike.

Im definitely an introvert, and I get drained so much when Im around others, especially girls my age. Because all they talk about is make up, their hair, their 789 ex boyfriends, their current boyfriends, how their nailpolish matches with their dresses and things alike. If I just have to listen to such conversations I freak the fuck out. Thats just so shallow. Im rather antisocial and I really want to change that, but how should I do that if every singlke time I make a new friend they annoy me within the first month because all they are is shallow, and easy to figure out.

Maybe that all makes me seem like Im rather a thinker than a feeler, but Im also so sensitive, so extremely. If someone yells at me I begin to cry.
My boyfriend (hes really the most important person in my life) got yelled at by his father the other day and I just started crying because I felt how terrible he was feeling. And Im also so sensitive to touch, I dont like crowds, I hate them. I dont like being touched when people are talking to me. I feel smothered and will withdraw from them.

I have like 3 people who dont annoy me, the others are all sooo extreemely draining.

But I feel the vibes in groups, I can easily figure out who is the "groupruler", which power whom has. But just as long as Im not emotionally engaged in these kind of situations. Then my decisions will be the worst ever because I start feeling. I often try to distance myself from my feeling side because its just so strong and every emotion is so overwhelming if I wouldnt try to stop it a bit.

I can be cold as ice if someone hurts me, if this is the case I will instantly neglect this person and ignore him or her like forever. I dont like to show my feelings, yet if someone knows me well they can read everything straight of my face. I cant hide my feelings altough I would want to do that. Its just impossible.

Im also very moody and perfectionistic, Ive got so high standards for myself and therefore for others aswell. If someone doesnt fits my idea of "perfection" I get really angry. Im very bad temperamented.


I hope someone can help me figure it out, because I just cant let the topic MBTI go without being 100% sure which type I am. Its not letting me go

And Im sorry if my english is bad, its just a second language

Thanks a lot!

My guess is INFP. But I'm not sure about that. There aren't any obvious signs of Ne in your post, so do you ever act in an Ne way? If not, ISFP is possible.

 

[Anna Jorovic]

I dont know if Im a sensor, could be. But Im good at understanding theories and making them up. Like I see some events and then I connect it. When someone I know behaves weird I make up a thousand theories for the cause. Often pickung up things that are in no actual connection with a weird behaviour, but I just start theorizing. My boyfriend said I often pick up on things and draw it together and it just makes no sense. And thats true I guess.

That's Ne. You're INFP, as far as I'm concerned.

 

[lume]

To that Fe thing, I think I used Fe as a child. A lot. But now I dont really know if I do this. It depends. If Im in a good mood I will try to adhere to these shared values. But if Im in a bad mood I dont really care about that. But maybe thats expressing emotions? I dont know. I try to hide my feelings, it makes me so uncomfortable when an emotional reaction is expected from me. I sometimes have this "i dont care, leave me alone" attitude. And then I begin to say really shallow things, which is usually not my typical behaviour. Its like a mask or something, because I dont want people to notice how easy i am to be hurt, and how vulnerable I am.
I always thought of Fe users as being seen as the nice ones, where you can say that these types are true feeling types. But with me I almost seem like a thinker. There are only a few issues which really cause me to get so sensitive. And if thats the case I really feel it deep down, in such depth.

And i do worry a lot, and Im anxious, its so easy to trigger bad thoughts, and I just cant let go of them, altough I know that thats all something that I made up in my head. I tend to make it all worse, I cant even concentrate on other things then. Until I talk about that with someone.


I usually dont like it when people are shallow, or these typical girlys, talking about clothes, make up and their hair all day long. I even dont like it when I see that someone thinks hes the best, bragging all the time how good he is. And also if someone is such a great storyteller who tells lies und unrealistic things all the time, I cant stand that.
If I see such behaviour in someone, thats someone I avoid. Im even really bitchy to them, talking back at them. So if I dont like someone I show that really open.
Im drawn to people in which I see depth, people with whom I can talk about anything. That could go from analyzing others behaviour, to science or ethical questions. And if I cant talk with someone about such things, then I get tired of them. And I prefer people who are thinkers. I just cant stand such emotional, dramatical persons.
Also, I think that most people are more or less easy to figure out, or thats how I see it. Maybe sometimes theres more underneath that I can see. (But I often start interpreting soemones behaviour, making up several stories in my head why he could have done some things , when in reality that persons just dumb.)


It could be that thats all just useless rambling, but maybe that helps to figure it out.

 

[lume]

This sounds like weak Ne. Which makes me think you are an Isfj even more. Intuitive doms or aux will make sense of the all the theorizing. I'm leaning more towards weak Ne than Ni because Ni uses intuition to narrow down possibilities and Ne expands them. From you example you seem to be expanding possibilities. I'd shy away from INFJ simply because they are Ni dom. The things they process with their intuition need to make sense more often than not as that is their dom function. They are also more focused on finding the best fit solution not expanding upon possibilities as you described yourself doing.



Si deals more with memory of detail not the experience in general. I would't rule out Si all together based on your memory.



That is Fe. Introverts with Fe can still be prone to social awkwardness. Fe is a decision function above all else. It makes decisions by weighting its effect on other people. Fi does not do that. Fi makes a decision based on a subjective moral framework. If Fi is doing what they know is right based on that framework they’re not going to particularly care if someone is mad at them. They might even be offended that the other person doesn't understand their unique point of view. They focus on authenticity. They must be true to themselves regardless of outside opinions. In addition F can be (not always) kind of oblivious to what those social rules even are. Many Fi users express frustration with being expected to navigate the social world of Fe. You seem to know what they are and take care to adhere to them which leads me to believe you use Fe.




Don't all people do that? That just sounds like the basic process of getting to know someone. This is also coming from a Fe user so yea lol. Let me ask you this how you decide if you even want to give someone a chance in the first place. How do you know you want to begin this process of getting to know them assuming you had a choice.

Its just that Im pretty sure my mother is ISFJ, and shes so different from me. Thats the reason why I dont think that Im ISFJ.

 

[iNtrovert]

Its just that Im pretty sure my mother is ISFJ, and shes so different from me. Thats the reason why I dont think that Im ISFJ.

My mother is also an ISFJ lol. You can be the same type and still have differences. Type is like the blue print for a house. It tells you where everything is but it won't tell you what is actually in each room or how it's decorated. Your mother is also older than you and how type manifest itself can be altered by age. I would suggest you look at the functions before you compare yourself to others to determine your type. I also picked up on a little function bias. It's important to remember online profiles of the different types and even functions are riddled with bias and stereotypes. I let those things confuse me quite a bit when I was starting out lol. I had to deprogram myself and start over. It also kind of sounds like you have in your mind the type you most likely are and are reluctant to change it. Which is fine. I'd just explore that type and really look at the functions of that type in depth. It also helps to interact with people that share that type on the forum. Yes there is variety within type but usually when you get to the root of an issue on here the thought process of those that share your type will seem familiar if you know what I mean. Good luck. I hope you found something I said helpful. Ooo and if you need a list of good unbiased reading material I have some suggestions

 

[lume]

Yeah, Ill do that. Could I get a list?

 

[iNtrovert]

1."Im Not crazy Im Just Not You" I thought it was a good intro to type book. It's pretty easy to read and gives a brife history of type if im not mistaken.
2. "Please Understand Me"
3."Please understand me II" ( Gives a more in depth look at type)
4. Last but not least "Jung psycological types" ( Huge undertaking and that is why I haven’t read it yet. imo the hardest read but most infromative. It's my new year’s resolution to get through it )

Some side reading
"The neroscience of personality"
"Introvert Power"
"Was that really me" (meh it's ok. It deals with type under stress)
...And if you're into religion "Knowing me knowing god"