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  1. #111
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    I would definitely argue that. no strings attached relationships are always more authentic
    I didn't realize what you quoted implied until you replied with this, but I personally disagree that no strings attached relationships are more authentic. For me anyways, because sex is something deeply emotional and binding for me. I couldn't have sex with someone without develop feelings for them, or getting thoughts in my head that what we had would go somewhere further. I also feel like if there's no love there and it's just sex then it's not worth my time. I don't want to waste my emotions on something that isn't going to be significant in the future. So you can take that as you will.

    unlike 2s however, their positivity isn't as much a part of their self image (in fact, some 7s would describe their personality as more "dark". Sx/Sp 7s can even come across as 4-ish) and they don't usually attempt to direct the energy of the group the way 2s do (this is why 2 is a power seeking type and not 7. 7 is more "whatever happens happens" and take a less deliberative approach to social interaction).
    I think I'm more 7 in this sense. I don't attempt to control or manipulate the energy of the group. Or maybe I'm taking it in a more conniving manner than you're trying to communicate. I like having my positive nature have positive effects on people. I like being uplifting to others. I love giving people a source of hope about life that they may not have otherwise. But I don't want to manipulate people's emotions in the group I'm with, I let them feel what they're feeling and then I'll do whatever I can to make their day a little brighter.

    (I also do get a little preachy when debating someone - most of the arguments I start are primarily based on something that go against my morals)
    7w6 - 2w3 - 8w7 sx/so


  2. #112
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chanaynay View Post
    I didn't realize what you quoted implied until you replied with this, but I personally disagree that no strings attached relationships are more authentic. For me anyways, because sex is something deeply emotional and binding for me. I couldn't have sex with someone without develop feelings for them, or getting thoughts in my head that what we had would go somewhere further. I also feel like if there's no love there and it's just sex then it's not worth my time. I don't want to waste my emotions on something that isn't going to be significant in the future. So you can take that as you will.
    I may have spoken a little too soon. sexual relationships require at least a few strings, because you both have needs that only the other person can fulfill (for example, in a monogamous relationship, sex). personally, if there do need to be strings attached, I like to make them known so that both parties know exactly what they're getting into and what is expected of whom. 2s on the other hand operate based on subjective give and take, implicit expectations and "I scratch your back, you scratch mine" sort of thinking.


    I think I'm more 7 in this sense. I don't attempt to control or manipulate the energy of the group. Or maybe I'm taking it in a more conniving manner than you're trying to communicate. I like having my positive nature have positive effects on people. I like being uplifting to others. I love giving people a source of hope about life that they may not have otherwise. But I don't want to manipulate people's emotions in the group I'm with, I let them feel what they're feeling and then I'll do whatever I can to make their day a little brighter.
    (I also do get a little preachy when debating someone - most of the arguments I start are primarily based on something that go against my morals)
    it did come off a little more conniving than I was intending (it's no secret I don't like 2s, but I tried to provide a comparison with minimal bias)

    if my observations of you carry any weight, I've noticed that you make subtle attempts to steer the other person's emotions in a more "positive" direction, but ultimately don't force it on them (which could either be interpreted as 2-ish or 7-ish imo)
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  3. #113
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    I may have spoken a little too soon. sexual relationships require at least a few strings, because you both have needs that only the other person can fulfill (for example, in a monogamous relationship, sex). personally, if there do need to be strings attached, I like to make them known so that both parties know exactly what they're getting into and what is expected of whom. 2s on the other hand operate based on subjective give and take, implicit expectations and "I scratch your back, you scratch mine" sort of thinking.
    I like letting the partner know what he's getting into and I usually like to know what I am as well but I don't push to ask too much so I don't seem clingy or hesitant, etc.

    it did come off a little more conniving than I was intending (it's no secret I don't like 2s, but I tried to provide a comparison with minimal bias)
    If I am a 2w3, you will start to like them.

    if my observations of you carry any weight, I've noticed that you make subtle attempts to steer the other person's emotions in a more "positive" direction, but ultimately don't force it on them (which could either be interpreted as 2-ish or 7-ish imo)
    WHY AM I SO BORDERLINE
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  4. #114
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chanaynay View Post
    I like letting the partner know what he's getting into and I usually like to know what I am as well but I don't push to ask too much so I don't seem clingy or hesitant, etc.
    If I am a 2w3, you will start to like them.
    WHY AM I SO BORDERLINE
    also, I should have clarified, 2s are not like 8s. they're not going to strong arm you into liking them unless they are severely fucking unhealthy . average to healthy 2s are more about influence. they don't directly try to control people, but they will set up scenarios and manage certain dynamics which will suggest the behavior they're wishing to elicit. they're still hoping to sway you, they just want you to come to the decision yourself. on the other hand, 7s in this situation will typically be oblivious to all these social games. their minds are elsewhere
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
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    "You are a gay version of Gambit" Speed Gavroche
    "I wish that I could be affected by any hate, but I can't, cuz I just get affected by the bank" Chamillionaire

  5. #115
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    also, I should have clarified, 2s are not like 8s. they're not going to strong arm you into liking them unless they are severely fucking unhealthy . average to healthy 2s are more about influence. they don't directly try to control people, but they will set up scenarios and manage certain dynamics which will suggest the behavior they're wishing to elicit. they're still hoping to sway you, they just want you to come to the decision yourself. on the other hand, 7s in this situation will typically be oblivious to all these social games. their minds are elsewhere
    Yeah, I kinda figured since both my mom and ESFJ bestie are 2w3s. When I build relationships, though, I just act like myself and hope things go well. I don't want to sway anyone, although I hope that they will like me because I like when people appreciate me for who I am. Yeah, it does make me upset when people turn out to not have liked me but it's more like a rejection of myself and my genuine attempt to be friends with them. It's not like I try to do things to get people to like me, then our relationship wouldn't feel real because they would like me for something other than who I am. It's like what you said about sexual relationships, both parties should know what they're getting into.
    7w6 - 2w3 - 8w7 sx/so


  6. #116
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    i think 7's just assume you like them haha
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  7. #117
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    i think 7's just assume you like them haha
    Really? Interesting. I'm good at reading whether someone likes me or not but I feel like even if someone likes me we both have to put in effort into building a connection with each other to actually become friends. Of course, I just have a pleasant conversation with someone once and then assume from there on that we're friends.
    7w6 - 2w3 - 8w7 sx/so


  8. #118
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chanaynay View Post
    Really? Interesting. I'm good at reading whether someone likes me or not but I feel like even if someone likes me we both have to put in effort into building a connection with each other to actually become friends. Of course, I just have a pleasant conversation with someone once and then assume from there on that we're friends.
    sure haha or neutral but neutral for me is usually to like ya until i don't. i think i assume it's like that for other people but truth is i don't really think about it.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
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  9. #119
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    sure haha or neutral but neutral for me is usually to like ya until i don't. i think i assume it's like that for other people but truth is i don't really think about it.
    Neutral for me is I have no positive or negative feelings about you and we haven't really connected on a meaningful level yet. Haha maybe this stuff could be like so-first vs. so-last? I love that you like people until they make you dislike them, though. That's so nice to hear that there are people like that whose default feeling about everyone in the room is liking. Gives me hope about the world.
    7w6 - 2w3 - 8w7 sx/so


  10. #120
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chanaynay View Post
    Neutral for me is I have no positive or negative feelings about you and we haven't really connected on a meaningful level yet. Haha maybe this stuff could be like so-first vs. so-last? I love that you like people until they make you dislike them, though. That's so nice to hear that there are people like that whose default feeling about everyone in the room is liking. Gives me hope about the world.
    haha aww that's sweet of ya. it's my over positive nature i suppose...i expect to have a good day when i leave the house and i expect to enjoy the company of those i meet. that's weird isn't it? haha
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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