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  1. #41
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post

    Actually I read some interesting blurb the other day about how that's more of an so/sx thing - the clinging - and sx-doms (especially sx/sp) can actually need less time with their partners, but the time they do have has to be super super connected. I am not an expert on that particular topic but I thought it was an interesting look at it.
    Yes, this is very true (for sx/sp anyway). Not nonsense at all. Quality definitely trumps quantity.

  2. #42
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    /jumps into thread after prolonged hours of stalking

    Quote Originally Posted by skylights View Post
    Actually I read some interesting blurb the other day about how that's more of an so/sx thing - the clinging - and sx-doms (especially sx/sp) can actually need less time with their partners, but the time they do have has to be super super connected. I am not an expert on that particular topic but I thought it was an interesting look at it.
    @The Great One, actually I agree with this as well. I cling to people I'm interested naturally because I want to maintain my connection with them for as long as possible. I always want to hang out and make sure our relationship is in a good standing and building a solid foundation. Others can see this as invasive or suffocating because if I feel a disconnect in communication it will stress me out and I'll try to repair it as fast as possible.

    With sx/sp it seems more like if the chemistry is there, there's nothing to worry about. If there's a rift in communication it's more interpreted as incompatibility and not attended to (so-last maybe). As an so/sx I'll bend over backwards trying to make a relationship work, constantly talking to them and not letting them escape my grasp.
    7w6 - 2w3 - 8w7 sx/so


  3. #43
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chanaynay View Post
    /jumps into thread after prolonged hours of stalking



    The Great One, actually I agree with this as well. I cling to people I'm interested naturally because I want to maintain my connection with them for as long as possible. I always want to hang out and make sure our relationship is in a good standing and building a solid foundation. Others can see this as invasive or suffocating because if I feel a disconnect in communication it will stress me out and I'll try to repair it as fast as possible.

    With sx/sp it seems more like if the chemistry is there, there's nothing to worry about. If there's a rift in communication it's more interpreted as incompatibility and not attended to (so-last maybe). As an so/sx I'll bend over backwards trying to make a relationship work, constantly talking to them and not letting them escape my grasp.
    Well I also read that sx/sp were generally comfortable with clingy lovers, while sp/sx were not. Interesting, I will have to do some investigating.

    On a side note, I feel like I just can't get the same intensity from a so/sx that I can a sx dom. Take for example in a group setting, it seems the so/sx types tend to bounce around everywhere and tend to talk to everybody where the sx doms will tend to just focus on having an intense conversation with just one person.

  4. #44
    untitled Chanaynay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Great One View Post
    Well I also read that sx/sp were generally comfortable with clingy lovers, while sp/sx were not. Interesting, I will have to do some investigating.
    It could be that sp/sx is generally more sensitive to personal space?

    On a side note, I feel like I just can't get the same intensity from a so/sx that I can a sx dom. Take for example in a group setting, it seems the so/sx types tend to bounce around everywhere and tend to talk to everybody where the sx doms will tend to just focus on having an intense conversation with just one person.
    Lol this reminds me of our Skype call the other night. If you want to get that intensity from an so/sx I suggest having them alone with you. I'd say we can be very responsive to the intensity that sx-doms are searching for if we're in the mindset for one-on-one time. Although making the first move on your part is important as it assures us that we're not breaking any social barriers by starting off very intensely. If a guy didn't really do anything I wouldn't either because there's always that lingering fear that if I do say something I'll be disrupting what we have between us already. This is how it works for me at least.

    In response to the OP, I have no idea what your actual instincts are because we haven't chatted long enough (you're clearly ENTP though) but I will say that self-preservation is a necessity for survival. I may suck at it but I do need to take care of myself if I don't want to fall into bad health. I have to admit that I'm used to people taking care of me, and the second week of college I actually got sick because I was having trouble keeping up with my physical needs but even if I do know how to take care of myself to an extent that doesn't mean I'm not sp-last. I mean, if I want to live a healthy life I gotta do something to some extent haha. But physical danger is simply something I don't consider when making decisions.
    7w6 - 2w3 - 8w7 sx/so


  5. #45
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    @Chanaynay

    It could be that sp/sx is generally more sensitive to personal space?
    That's the thing though, I don't really need that much personal space. I also don't mind clingy lovers. The only time that they annoy me is when I am trying to get work done and yet they want to spend time together. That is unacceptable, and they must allow me to finish my work.

    Lol this reminds me of our Skype call the other night. If you want to get that intensity from an so/sx I suggest having them alone with you. I'd say we can be very responsive to the intensity that sx-doms are searching for if we're in the mindset for one-on-one time. Although making the first move on your part is important as it assures us that we're not breaking any social barriers by starting off very intensely. If a guy didn't really do anything I wouldn't either because there's always that lingering fear that if I do say something I'll be disrupting what we have between us already. This is how it works for me at least.
    lol yes, our skype convo is what made me bring this up.

  6. #46
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    @Chanaynay

    In response to the OP, I have no idea what your actual instincts are because we haven't chatted long enough (you're clearly ENTP though) but I will say that self-preservation is a necessity for survival. I may suck at it but I do need to take care of myself if I don't want to fall into bad health. I have to admit that I'm used to people taking care of me, and the second week of college I actually got sick because I was having trouble keeping up with my physical needs but even if I do know how to take care of myself to an extent that doesn't mean I'm not sp-last. I mean, if I want to live a healthy life I gotta do something to some extent haha. But physical danger is simply something I don't consider when making decisions.
    Yeah after our conversation the other day, it was very apparent to me that I am not sp last. You don't seem to care at all about physical danger or being physically hurt. In fact, all you seemed to care about was about whether you were going to be emotional hurt. To me, these concepts were foreign. I personally could care less if I am emotionally hurt, all that I care about is whether I am physically hurt. The only way that I can be emotionally hurt, is if I am in love with a woman and she then leaves me. That would emotionally hurt me.

  7. #47
    brainheart
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Great One View Post
    Well I also read that sx/sp were generally comfortable with clingy lovers, while sp/sx were not. Interesting, I will have to do some investigating.

    On a side note, I feel like I just can't get the same intensity from a so/sx that I can a sx dom. Take for example in a group setting, it seems the so/sx types tend to bounce around everywhere and tend to talk to everybody where the sx doms will tend to just focus on having an intense conversation with just one person.
    Sx/sp and so/sx are both syn-flow. Syn-flow types tend to be more giving and flexible in relationships. For this reason I think a sx/sp will be more comfortable with someone others may see as clingy. Sp/sx is contra flow and they are more likely to push others away who are too needy. I've seen sx/so types also say they hate clingy.

    In a group setting you will not get the same intensity from a so/sx because they have too many things/people distracting them. But if you can get them alone they will be plenty intense.

  8. #48
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    Yes, this is very true (for sx/sp anyway). Not nonsense at all. Quality definitely trumps quantity.
    Yes! You were the one who first mentioned this to me a while ago. I couldn't remember where I'd heard it before! Thank you brainheart!

  9. #49
    Senior Member The Great One's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by brainheart View Post
    Sx/sp and so/sx are both syn-flow. Syn-flow types tend to be more giving and flexible in relationships. For this reason I think a sx/sp will be more comfortable with someone others may see as clingy. Sp/sx is contra flow and they are more likely to push others away who are too needy. I've seen sx/so types also say they hate clingy.

    In a group setting you will not get the same intensity from a so/sx because they have too many things/people distracting them. But if you can get them alone they will be plenty intense.
    Just in the past few days, I've heard so much about this syn-flow and contra flow stuff. Where can I find more information about it.

  10. #50
    The Dark Lord The Wailing Specter's Avatar
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    So, I'm unpleasant to be around because I am So/Sp?
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