Being 15 and all, I don't know myself that well, and seemingly no amount of introspection has helped that - so I've filled in a questionnaire. I apologise if you have seen it a million times before.
1. What is beauty? What is love?
To me...beauty is something that makes you feel awed, can change your view on things, or is impressive. Love is (a chemical reaction in the brain) liking someone, caring for someone, being devoted. I dunno.
2. What are your most important values?
Be nice to people and yourself: be selfless and caring. Be optimistic. Be knowledgeable. Push your limits on your knowledge and abilities.
3. Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place?
I don't have any spiritual or religious beliefs.
4. Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you?
I honestly think war and militaries should be illegal. I don't think it will ever happen; but consider if every country in the world disarmed. Any argument would have to be fought humanely, with brains and logic instead of mindless killing. However, my limited knowledge of the human condition is that this will never happen, and war is an inherent part of humanity. I think war is a massive waste of time, effort, money and lives.
Power to me? The hardest thing to control is yourself. Power is being true to yourself; not having addictions, being disciplined, maintaining a healthy mind and body. That's the only power I'll ever need. I have no desire to rule or control others.
5. What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?
Double standards, paradoxes, stories, relationships, science. My interests are: reading, watching movies, video games, occasionally mountain biking. I love stories, games are fun, and mountain biking is liberating. It sets your mind free and it's fun.
6. Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?
Yes, definitely. I am focused on my body, as I like to be healthy. "Thy body is a temple" or s/t. I find it interesting to talk about different ways of eating, different ways of curing diseases, etc. I particularly like "going against the grain" as in, going against what is advised by big pharmaceutical companies.
7. What do you think of daily chores?
Boring! Some are necessary, some aren't. Most are boring.
8. Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.
For some reason, I love most books and movies with bleak scenery or characters. Eg, Let The Right One In, Brokeback Mountain, Requiem For A Dream.
My favourite books and movies are: Those three above, The Green Mile, Misery, To Kill a Mockingbird, 1984, Silver Linings Playbook, Borat, Shaun of the Dead, Hot Fuzz, and Donnie Darko.
9. What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why?
Recently, all I can think of that's made me cry is Brokeback Mountain. (spoilers, i guess?) I love everything about that film. I love the beauty and the bleakness of the scenery, especially at the end. And the fact that the characters went through life basically empty, until they had each other. Yet they sort of killed each other: spending as little time as they did together killed their spirit. They should have just moved in together, as jack said. That would have been a dangerous move, but better than the alternative. Ennis didn't take a chance, and was left with nothing. Twenty years of broken promises, lies and wasted emotion. It kinda got to me.
A lot of things make me smile. I smile when I finally learn how to do something. I smile when I realise something. I smile when I better myself. I smile when my friends do. I smile at jokes.
10. Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging?
I like all nature, really; I forests and woods the best. I love standing on top of hills and gazing down at the scenery. It feels like serenity. But I like all nature and cities, really. I hate the ocean, though. It irrationally scares me. I think it's the vastness of it.
Evaluation & Behaviour
11. What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?
Apparently I can be cold. I can also be stubborn, and too argumentative. I dislike a lot of things about myself. I wish I were more skilled and intelligent.
12. What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?
Well, apparently I'm intelligent, and good at giving advice. They also say I'm funny. (I'm funnier in real life, even though that's a lame excuse for this humourless drivel I'm typing right now it's true!)
13. In what areas of your life would you like help?
Mathematical ability. I feel like I have potential in maths and science, I just need to unlock it.
14. Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.
Now, I don't. But now I'm much more optimistic. A few months ago, I felt stuck in a rut of: School, home, weekend, school. Not much enjoyment. But now I feel like I can connect to others around me more easily. As a result, I couldn't think as clearly, and I felt enjoyment ebbing away. Everything seemed sort of grey and pointless. I just went through it, not losing optimism, and relishing the few enjoyable moments.
People & Interactions
15. What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?
I like friendliness, open-mindedness, calmness, humour, intelligence, and understanding,. I dislike most things others dislike. (selfishness, narcissism, rudeness) if people are nice enough, I normally get along with them.
16. How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner?
Dude, I dunno, I'm 15. Romance is sweet and all, I guess? As is sex, as long as both are fine with it. In a partner I'd like someone funny, sweet, patient and caring.
17. If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?
That they'd fall into depression, or do something that harms themselves/others, that they'd be brainwashed by media/religion/whatever.
Ultimately, you can't do much about these things when they're someone else's decision. So I'd educate the child, tell them the pros/cons of everything, protect them when necessary, and let them make their own mind about things.
18. A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?
If they just make a comment, inwardly I'll flare (best way to describe it) but outwardly I'll ask them to elaborate. If they cannot make good points, then I'll just ignore it. Otherwise, I'll take their view into consideration and research it further.
19. Describe your relationship to society. How do you see people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.
Individuals are generally good and well-meaning, but some groups are awful. A social problem is obviously discrimination, eg sexism or racism.
20. How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?
All my friends are intelligent. They're all interesting. They're also all progressive, open-minded and funny. They're pretty caring, too, though sometimes they can be a little ignorant, which is OK. I don't like to show my darker or more tender self around them; however, I encourage them to share their feelings, if needed.
I love to make them laugh, or participate in jokes. I gain energy from enjoyable banter. However, I feel the need to add this: yesterday, I went out with my friends to the cinema. After, we went for a meal, and I was enjoying talking to them. Then I hit a mental wall, and I felt like I couldn't think or breathe properly. My interactions after that were becoming less and less enthusiastic, until I bid them farewell and I felt the blood flow properly, and I could think again. I felt a lot better after 30 minutes by myself, walking home, talking to no one. Yet I feel as if I look forward to interaction too much to be an introvert. But now that I'm thinking about it, when I'm surrounded by people constantly, I often look for places to breathe so I can sit and think. (This is probably common for most people, I just thought I'd add it)
21. How do you behave around strangers?
I'm friendly. A little reserved, trip over words a lot, look around a lot, hope someone else will carry the conversation. I try not to act too outgoing, either.