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INFP, INFJ, ENFP? MAYBE even ENFJ? Oh my gosh.

sillyface

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2013
Messages
20
MBTI Type
??F?
Hello all!

I cannot figure myself out. I have reasons to believe I'm an INFP/INFJ but I also sometimes think I'm an extrovert with social anxiety.. Then again, I relate to things in almost every type.. I could probably relate to a penguin if I tried!

If I give reasons for why I think I'm each will someone help me out? :) I have a counselor but he doesn't know much about MBTI. He said as far as DiSC personality, I'm a C, but I think I'm a blend of S, C, and I.

Reasoning:

Reasons I think I'm an INFP:

1. I feel like I am ;)
2. Whenever I test, I get this most often. Probably about 90% of the time, but that could be because that's what I want to be or that's what I actually am?
3. I CANNOT keep anything organized to save my life except at work, I try really hard so no one gets mad at me. My room, purse, and car are disaster zones, no matter how often I set the goal to "become more organized"
4. I cannot save money or budget well. I've tried, but I always give up. The only reason I have money saved right now is thanks to my tax returns. Oy. If I end up single for the rest of my life, or with another P, we will have no money.
5. I'm artistic and right brained, most of the time. I'm a graphic designer, who wanted to be an artist but whose parents thought I'd end up homeless. Any career choices that ever appealed to me were ones that included art or helping others. So ones that make no money and would make my parents sad! "Why don't you go to pharmacy school?" They said.
6. I get bored easily, and always have since I was a baby.
7. I am a dreamer and have recently tried to be less so because I realize it doesn't help anything or anyone, but I do have a child-like sense of wonder.
8. I care a lot about social justice, but if I really let myself think about it, I realize that the perpetrators of oppression and such were once children too, and this makes me sad for them I guess. Especially if they were abused themselves.
9. I try to control a LOT, but it's out of fear, and also it's when I think I should based on what other people think or how they act. For instance, I will plan what I will say or do in situations where I am afraid of rejection etc. But I am also diagnosed with social anxiety and OCD.
10. I'm really bad at logic.
11. One person told me her first impression of me was that I was "very much my own person".
12. I procrastinate like an F-student :) But I always get the most important things done. I just can't be one of those people who prepare in advance for assignments or tasks (note that I had to finish this sentence after typing another sentence and coming back to realize i didn't finish this one…this actually happened twice..nope, three times.)
13. I am rarely on time except to things that I find very very important to me. I.e, work and school, I would be late to (oops) but my counseling appointments I would not. That's selfish I realize, but alas.
14. If I'm not stressed I enjoy and even seek out spontaneity and adventure though sometimes when I'm stressed I'll get into the "forget it" mode, and rebel against my fear.
15. I love to laugh, and it usually helps me when I'm stressed but when I'm too too stressed, I can find it hard to even laugh. I think that might be everyone though?
16. I don't understand a lot of the type lingo regardless of how much I research it, which is why I'm asking someone to just tell me.
17. I'm childlike, even though I'm almost 25, and people think I'm 12. That could be the way I look, but I also just feel like I act younger, and people have told me I do. And by 12 I mean, people just think I'm younger than I look. I'm good at exaggerating, not sure what type that is.
18. I've edited this a few times so I don't appear "crazy" but also in case anything is "wrong", which leads me to...

Reasons I might be an INFJ:

1. I feel safer doing non-creative jobs because they're less likely to be criticized or rejected. Even though I value creativity a lot, I am sometimes paralyzed by fear when I try to create art or anything of the sort, and prefer task based things that are simple like proofreading, though then I can get distracted. So..
2. I'm ridiculously stubborn and can be rigid.
3. I have OCD.. and therefore black/white thinking often
4. I make a lot of value judgments
5. I can be very critical and judgmental
6. I like to give advice if I can, though lately I'm realizing I don't have to all the time. I always felt like I *had* to. And I think i'm good at it most of the time..
7. Sense of humor can sometimes be morbid. Like today, when the printer at work wasn't working, I joked I was going to slit my wrists with the printer paper. :) That sounds worse than it was delivered…
8. If someone takes advantage of me or disagrees with/somehow violates something I'm very passionate about, I will get pretty angry, which usually results with me cutting them with words. Once I threw something at someone but that was in middle school and I never ever want to do that again. Nor have I. And I still feel overwhelming guilt about it. I'm rambling.. Infp?
9. I'm afraid I am an INFJ, and I'm afraid that means that I am. Does that make sense? Probably not. Basically, I don't want to be an INFJ because (I'm so sorry for saying this, I have INFJ friends who I love!!) But I feel like they can seem kind of "mean"? And that's the last thing I'd want to be. I also feel like I get along with more people than INFJs would? But then I'm afraid I'm trying to make myself an INFP when I'm really an INFJ. Oh, my brain! again, I'm really sorry to INFJs :/ This is based on my research and my probably faulty intepretation of it..
10. I like to follow the rules most of the time, mostly out of fear or disapproval, danger, or something else.
11. I'm obsessing about my type, which I feel like is very INFJ of me.
12. I overanalyze and research a lot and think way too much. But usually my feelings cause my thoughts, I've been told..
13. I can be depressing if I'm depressed, but usually hide this from people I dont know well and put on a mask. But then I feel I'm being insincere. Such conflict in my brain..

Reasons I might be an E of some sort:

1. I hate being alone. But I also get very anxious around people I don't know. I'd rather be with people I'm super close to and comfortable with than alone most of the time, but then I tend to hibernate when I get too stressed out.
2. I like to make friends wherever I go.
3. People tell me I'm an introvert but I honestly think it's just anxiety..
4. If I'm upset I might want to hide but if I force myself to be around people I feel better. But it depends how upset/stressed I am.

Oh dear heavens, if I'm just plain old crazy, you can let me know too. Just kidding :)
 

Abbey

New member
Joined
Nov 12, 2012
Messages
166
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
You seem like an ENFP to me
Do you have a lot of ideas/projects that you never seem to follow through on?
 

sillyface

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2013
Messages
20
MBTI Type
??F?
Also, I like to have decisions settled, but once I make decisions, I often wish I could change my mind.

And yes Abbey! Absolutely. That could be INFP too though right?
 
I

Infinite Bubble

Guest
Ne dominance comes through your post; I find there's often an energy that is conveyed when reading their posts. Sort of sounds excitable. I can see Fe though, too. Together this would mean function-wise, an ENTP. But I doubt that. Likely an NFP (probably ENFP). I certainly think Ne over Ni at least.
 

Abbey

New member
Joined
Nov 12, 2012
Messages
166
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I say you're an ENFP because my sister is an ENFP and you sound just like her.

To me that sounds more P than J. Although you like to have your decisions settled, it could be that your social anxiety or OCD makes you fearful of leaving things open-ended, even though you want decisions to be changeable.

Yes that's also a trait of an INFP. It's the cognitive function Ne which is an INFP's auxiliary function, but an ENFP's dominant function. I'm an INFP, you don't really strike me as an one. All the statements under INFP seem more ENFP, although they do happen with the former.

I can't really think of a good question to ask you that could help further determine your type, but if you want to supply more information/examples that could help haha.
 

sillyface

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2013
Messages
20
MBTI Type
??F?
Hmm, the reason I think I'm more INFP than ENFP is that I can also be super pessimistic. Right now I'm in a decent mood, so ya know, it shows, I guess. But I feel like I kinda learned to be pessimistic based on stuff that's happened to me, and based on how my parents view life. But I could also just be pessimistic by nature.
 

Abbey

New member
Joined
Nov 12, 2012
Messages
166
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
"But I feel like I kinda learned to be pessimistic based on stuff that's happened to me, and based on how my parents view life."

Explain.
 

sillyface

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2013
Messages
20
MBTI Type
??F?
Hmm, I grew up hearing how dangerous life and the world is from my parents.. like how I "shouldn't park next to vans because anyone can pop out and steal me".. soo.. there's that. And as a child I had my trust broken by a lot of people I was close to, that made it difficult for me to trust people in adulthood. For instance, at age 24, just had my first boyfriend, and he broke my heart even after I told him about my trust issues. Grr. I just feel like bad things happen to me, even though it's just my interpretation of those things. I kinda have a "learned helplessness" as they say.
 

sillyface

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Joined
Mar 1, 2013
Messages
20
MBTI Type
??F?
Oh, and I'm still a wreck four months after the breakup.. when we only dated for two months. *blush*
 

Abbey

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Joined
Nov 12, 2012
Messages
166
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Oh, I see, I'm very sorry to hear that.
I don't think optimism/pessimism has to do with MBTI types honestly. I'm relatively new to MBTI types, but from what I see, it seems like they're innate and you're born with one (nature). Pessimism is acquired, like you said- from your upbringing, influences, experiences (nurture). INFP's aren't particularly pessimistic. I think it varies for each INFP.

The thing that makes me think you're an ENFP over an INFP is that it seems you're more Ne dominant than Fi. Fi is deciding something is significant because you've reviewed how it lines up with your values. As an INFP I feel everything very deeply, everything is connected back to my feelings and my core values. The passion of hating incongruities between my ideals versus reality is painful and constant. ENFPs and INFPs use both often; they are very similar-it's just which function is more dominant.

Learning your MBTI type is sometimes easier as an overall evaluation, not lining up specific characteristics of yourself with characteristics of a certain type.
For example, someone could say they have brown eyes, black hair and big lips, but that in itself doesn't make them African-American. Those characteristics are a result of being black, being black is a result of having black parents. Just like having certain characteristics is a result of being a specific type, being whatever type is a result of how you prefer to think. I strongly think you're an ENFP, but I don't know you, I can only base my conclusion off of what you say and how you say it. So learn how you think and learn how MBTI types really work the lingo and everything (trust me it's worth it ;) and figure it out if you think I'm wrong or not understanding you.

I hope I've helped, I'm trying to get better at typing people, but I'm still learning. Good luck with figuring it out! Whatever type you are, whoever you are- you are significant and deserve love. Life is beautiful and there's so much reason to hope, I pray you can learn to be more optimistic and trust people again even though they've hurt you.
 

Santosha

New member
Joined
Feb 1, 2011
Messages
1,516
MBTI Type
HUMR
Enneagram
6
Instinctual Variant
sx
I'd go with INFP 6w7. THe 6's anxiety has an energy about it that can appear Extroverted, along with the focus on people/groups. However, based on your content I see inferior Te over Si. It can get tricky, because inferior Si can lead to hyper-focus on health and body sensation, which can also be attributed to 6's fear. Most 6w7's I know have toyed with ambiversion, but I personally believe you are one of the other. It doesn't have to be about people. Do you get lost in your own mind, comparing the external world to it.. or do you get lost in the external world and compare your mind to it?
 

sillyface

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2013
Messages
20
MBTI Type
??F?
Thank you so much Abbey! I like what you say about the African-American thing.. that's very true. There's no way everyone is everything in their type right? Took a peek at your profile, I can't believe you're only 16! You seem so mature, and knowledgeable. I think you will do great things with yourself :)

jontherobot: 72%? that's not very specific.

Legerdemain: ??? ELSD?
 

sillyface

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2013
Messages
20
MBTI Type
??F?
Huxley, ooh, interesting question! I think I look at the external world and freak out when my thoughts don't align. But I also think I get lost in my mind too. I think the problem is I don't really know myself. I feel like a chameleon sometimes. Trying to be what I think I should or want to be. What is Te? I've read about all of these but I feel like I need small one sentence summaries of each to actually understand them, haha.
 

Abbey

New member
Joined
Nov 12, 2012
Messages
166
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Thank you!

Ne- extroverted intuition; outer ideas, interpretations and possibilities; "what could be" (making connections, interpreting with imagination) [non-reality]
Ni- introverted intuition; inner ideas, interpretations and possibilities; "what will be" (foreseeing events) [future]
Se- extroverted sensing; outer information, data and experiences; "what is" (living in the moment) [present]
Si- introverted sensing; inner information, data and experiences; "what is" vs. "what was" (recalling past events provoked by the present situation) [past]

Te- extroverted thinking; outer logic; (applying structure and efficiency, dislikes negative consequences/standards not being met) [expressing thoughts]
Ti- introverted thinking; inner logic; (applying principles and analysis, dislikes inconsistencies/precision not being met) [thinking deeply]
Fe- extroverted feeling; outer harmony; (acting on group values) [expressing feelings]
Fi- introverted feeling; inner harmony; (acting on personal values) [feeling deeply]

I hope that makes sense to you.
 

sillyface

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2013
Messages
20
MBTI Type
??F?
That is actually so helpful! thank you! I definitely am an NF, I just can't figure out which of each I use more. How does stress play into this? For instance, when I'm stressed I might use one function more than another. Does that mean that's what I really am or that's my inferior function?
 

Abbey

New member
Joined
Nov 12, 2012
Messages
166
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
That's your inferior function.

For example: when I'm stressed I use my inferior function Te- I take responsibility, make lists, organize things.
 

Aesthete

Gone
Joined
Oct 6, 2012
Messages
384
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
1w2
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
Yes, inferior functions come out under stress. In my example: I start over-analyzing everything, being unable to distinguish between what is relevant and what isn't, putting too much emphasis on the latter (tertiary Si under stress, paired up with inferior Te under stress), and snapping at people who are disturbing me and not using their time as they should - that is, as it suits me (inferior Te under stress).

Of course, I'm not as bad as I sound, but that is the extreme case which happens some times.
 

sillyface

New member
Joined
Mar 1, 2013
Messages
20
MBTI Type
??F?
Hmmm, okay. I'm definitely a P then. I get like you Abbey, and Aesthete, when I'm stressed too.

As far as E, I'm about to go to a party where I only know one person and I'm therefore scared and all I want to do is watch Pride & Prejudice in my pajamas and knit. But I feel like I have to go because I don't want to be a bad friend. So therefore, I think I'm more I than E, eh? Maybe I'm an extroverted introvert.

Thanks for all your help! If any of my own analysis seems wrong, please feel free to correct me :) Talkin' to you, <insert MBTI stereotype here>'s!
 
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