It's really hard to tell your type from text, without really meeting you. I had the feeling you were ENFJ, just from how you wrote itself, there's this peculiar sense of writing that seems INFP but with much clearer intentions, suggesting you're probably not Fi-lead.
But I guess ENFP could work too
I'm not sure and I could be going off on a tangent with all that information. Though, one thing is that saying you have to do lists and goals set for the future doesn't tell me much about your personality or anyone's personality at all. I had a pretty troubling time growing up because I had an unwanted fear of future possibilities and the unknown, a sort of anxiety that always forces me into an ESTJ stress mode and it still does sometimes. And considering ESTJs are super responsible and organized, I would also start to think that my own stress character, was part of my character. I think this is due to me having somewhat of a neglected upbringing.
When life became really tough and traumatizing in the present, I couldn't possibly imagine/predict a future that would be any better. I still keep to do lists all the time, and they're everywhere, I used to be super-organized, but I soon found out as I got older that it was all organization due to stress. I was practically just using a vehicle of organization to fill in a sense of 'order' that I didn't see in my own life. And it's getting increasingly hard to stop these little 'ticks' that I've gotten, and let loose, to be who I am, because whenever I get a bit stressed, my Si reminds me of what personal history this 'bit' of stress connects to, and it starts a chain reaction of emotions, and I overcompensate in fear of the future like I did in the past. Then, I keep making mistakes because I think life is going to be a direct result of all the negative emotions I've felt in the past.
I had goals for the future as a 14 year old as well, I planned on going into law and becoming a lawyer so I could later do politics. But I failed to realize I'm the quietest person the planet, and I can't make a speech nor a rational and coherent statement alone, in public.... for the life of me. So therefore, it was never really actually a plan, ever
I thought I was
all that, but now I can see it's just how I felt about it, and not me weighing out 'pros' and 'cons' to just get somewhere. I can't say you're ENFP or ENFJ, more than I can say you're INFP or INFJ, because seeing understanding in your writing doesn't mean your ENFP, I've noticed ENFPs and INFJs are lead by their understanding so they are much more likely to play the role of the voice of reason rather than an INFP, but when it comes to text, it's the INFP's lair.
All I have to say is I understand, and it's hard to believe that someone gets you. Even though I'm saying this it's also healthy to know, that no one really gets what 'you're going through' exactly, but even the people you think are the most unrelatable you encounter, might just have the most troubling issue you have lingering around in his/her mind as well. This means that they understand and they 'get you' just like you would 'get' someone else that you've noticed had the same issue, like a friend who had suffered at the hands of abuse. It's just that, like everyone, we usually don't know how to 'show it' exactly like it is, either, so we never really know how deeply we can connect, and in what ways we can't connect, emotionally speaking.
This might be a helpful link to discern unhealthy habits and your true personality. Considering this guy can also 'get you'.
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-stupid-habits-you-develop-growing-up-in-broken-home/
Oh, and I'm turning 17 by october btw.
And i can't pay attention to paragraphs that other people write at all.
