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My boyfriend: ESTJ or ENTJ?

rav3n

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Alright. Yes, some attributes of his posts definitely resonate with my boyfriend (particularly, the straightforward style of humor and the "no fear" attitude). My boyfriend has ADHD though, so this definitely contributes to his spontaneous and joking nature.

Although my boyfriend generally trusts empirical data before intuition, he CAN be intuitive. I read up that ESTPs often have trouble in school due to the "theoretical" things discussed in class. This is not the case for him (he's practically a straight-A student and can write essays about theory just fine. It's just when he has to "go beyond" and find deeper meaning in physical things like art, when he has trouble. But when we're talking intuitive things like scientific theories, he can hold his own just fine in that area). It's true, he CAN have trouble trying to understand an abstract thought I'm explaining, but it's partly because I'm bad at explaining it myself. If I could find a way to explain it in a clear and concise way, he'd definitely understand better.
Halla also has ADHD and has no problems with school. Within the last year or so, attained his Masters.

If you really want to type him, cruise around and stick around a bit more on TypoC. You'll start to get a rhythm from types.
 

Amargith

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Honestly...I was leaning towards ENTJ. The Te gives ENTJs and ESTJs often the same vibe. But the opposition to rules unless they make sense, while done by some ESTJs, tends to be a lot more noticeable in ENTJs, ime. ESTJs may not like when the rules are illogical, but they will do what they can to work within those rules and optimise their work logically within that framework, ime. They are more flexible on the rules than ISTJs though, and less fussy about the details. Disdain for tradition also smells of ENTJ, as they prefer to get things done regardless of how it was done in the past. Whereas an ESTJ, ime, is more likely to take the tradition and make it their own somehow (NeTe approach, as such).

Additionally, the bursts of silliness, being laid back, and the dealing with problems while being in the moment, smells like confidence in his Te and the use of his Se, especially when he is 'off the clock'. ENTJs on here/ventrillo for instance often display a fair amount of Se as well, as they are unwinding at this site, resulting in silly loud behaviour, creating fun drama and thinking on their feet when asked questions. My work colleague irl was like that as well. Though he took point with his Te, he actually was that good at his job that he would joke and be crazy in between, as long as it didnt mess with the workflow. Meanwhile, they will also engage their Se when something unexpected comes up at work, and are usually a bit more flexible on how to handle things as long as it works, compared to ESTJs. Ime (I had two ESTJ bosses in the past), ESTJs wait to clock out before they get silly, and take unexpected changes way more seriously, relating them back as fast as they can to the way things are done. They can definitely get inventive about how to get to the way things are done..but ultimately, thats where they end up :thinking:

I also dont know what type you are, but if you are an N-dom yourself, then it is likely he is going to be less abstract than you and struggle more with it, in comparison, even as an ENTJ. I find that unless it has applicable value (Te), ENTjs tend not to focus on abstract things, and often when they do indulge in it, it is to serve that applicable value it could contain. Similarly, he might not be aware that he is using symbolism if he considers symbolism as a concept to be frilly and irrelevant to getting shit done. Asking an ENTJ to interpret a photograph is asking them to engage their baby Fi, and while some may relish in taking that challenge (especially those aware of wanting to develop that side of them), it goes against his typical nature: getting shit done. Interpreting a photograph just..might not be as rewarding and can seem frivolous compared to doing stuff that he can get tangible results from. If he is still quite young, this might be even more true, as he is still focused on his Te.

The game design major though...I found that interesting, as that does require a bit of vision. And imagination. Working out the practical elements is important to that vision though..which to me sounds NiSe.

*shrug*

Since I dont know him, and based on the information here, I can see both types. But I am definitely leaning towards ENTJ.
 

rav3n

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Quite often I agree with you about NTJs, [MENTION=5494]Amargith[/MENTION]. But in this analysis of ENTJs, I couldn't disagree more.
 

Amargith

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:laugh: I have more experience with INTJs than ENTJs, no doubt, so it is quite possible that Im wrong on this. It is just an opinion, and a gut feeling. If it was the guy himself talking, Id do a one on one to be sure ;)
 

Amargith

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Symbolisms are meaningful. But not at the expense of logic.

I dont disagree with, however, since the man isnt willing to get into Typology, I think that his definition of symbolism might not be up to the point where he recognises it as something he uses. He seems to be very focused on his Te and less focused on his secondary function...which is why we are having this debate, I guess. And Te tends to stick to reality ime ;)
 

rav3n

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I dont disagree with, however, since the man isnt willing to get into Typology, I think that his definition of symbolism might not be up to the point where he recognises it as something he uses. He seems to be very focused on his Te and less focused on his secondary function...which is why we are having this debate, I guess. And Te tends to stick to reality ime ;)
You're presupposing his secondary function is Ni which should be looking to and synthesizing symbols. It's our intuitive function that's interested in and conceptualises but rather than explicit detail, it's geared to overviews where if important enough, we will enter the Nardi zen zone.

So, to summarise, NF symbolism = logic holds no value. NT symbolism = not at the expense of logic.

The above is once again based on your presupposition which I'll have to disagree with, particularly since he shows A LOT of S characteristics and not many N ones. Refer to preference for detail, difficulty conceptualising, isn't a big picture thinker and is disinterested in the future.
 

Amargith

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I am merely suggesting that he might not realise that that is what he is doing, as he has no clear interest in figuring out his MBTI. Tbh, my INTJ didnt care for MBTI either and rolled his eyes at the mention of symbolism in Ni. He doesnt care how he does what he does, he just knows he is right :D

...and this guy sounds, with that natural rebellious streak, like he is feels he is always right :alttongue:

ESTJs will champion for logic, but ultimately will fall in line to respect the chain of commend, so to speak, or the way things are done, even if they do not like it, ime.
 

rav3n

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I am merely suggesting that he might not realise that that is what he is doing, as he has no clear interest in figuring out his MBTI. Tbh, my INTJ didnt care for MBTI either and rolled his eyes at the mention of symbolism in Ni. He doesnt care how he does what he does, he just knows he is right :D

...and this guy sounds, with that natural rebellious streak, like he is feels he is always right :alttongue:

ESTJs will champion for logic, but ultimately will fall in line to respect the chain of commend, so to speak, or the way things are done, even if they do not like it, ime.
You're not listening. He displays no intuitive qualities, as outlined below.
 

Amargith

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You're not listening. He displays no intuitive qualities, as outlined below.

Ok well this is getting us nowhere. I figured that our different views on this case would perhaps be enlightening to the @Op as ultimately, the only thing that matters is that she has the information she needs to have her question answered.

I listened to you, however, without closer examination of the person in question, i cannot agree or disagree with you at this point. And what I tossed out are just the things that struck me. It is by no means a full assessment, nor should it be considered one. :shrug:
 

rav3n

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Ok well this is getting us nowhere. I figured that our different views on this case would perhaps be enlightening to the @Op as ultimately, the only thing that matters is that she has the information she needs to have her question answered.

I listened to you, however, without closer examination of the person in question, i cannot agree or disagree with you at this point. And what I tossed out are just the things that struck me. It is by no means a full assessment, nor should it be considered one. :shrug:
Since when does a Ni-aux live in the present alone, without future predictions, without symbolic synthesis, without conceptual understanding and without any big picture thinking? What you're suggesting is an ENTJ without Ni, regardless whether MBTI is meaningful. I came to MBTI with full knowledge that I could do those things but had no labels to pin on them.
 

Amargith

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Since when does a Ni-aux live in the present alone, without future predictions, without symbolic synthesis, without conceptual understanding and without any big picture thinking? What you're suggesting is an ENTJ without Ni, regardless whether MBTI is meaningful. I came to MBTI with full knowledge that I could do those things but had no labels to pin on them.

You are basing this on the Ops perception. And Ni is a very hard function to describe or to pinpoint, and an even harder function to give concrete examples of. Im not saying he isnt ESTJ. Im saying that my gut is leaning towards ENTJ, due to the reasons outlined in my original post. There is little to no Si described in the OP as well, which is what the problem is in the first place. There is a bunch of Te, a bunch of Fi and some hints of what could be Ne or Se depending on how its expressed, for which we need more detail.

And I refuse to be pushed to make a definitive decision until I get more info, in true P fashion :alttongue:
 

rav3n

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You are basing this on the Ops perception. And Ni is a very hard function to describe or to pinpoint, and an even harder function to give concrete examples of. Im not saying he isnt ESTJ. Im saying that my gut is leaning towards ENTJ, due to the reasons outlined in my original post. There is little to no Si described in the OP as well, which is what the problem is in the first place. There is a bunch of Te, a bunch of Fi and some hints of what could be Ne or Se depending on how its expressed, for which we need more detail.

And I refuse to be pushed to make a definitive decision until I get more info, in true P fashion :alttongue:
There's a bunch of T and S functions being expressed by a third party observer. There's no N. There's also extroversion. This would logically point to ESTJ or ESTP.
 

Catzilla

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Another thing I'd like to point out is that he's very ADAPTABLE. He is never the type to get caught off-guard by new situations, even though he's not much of a future-predictor. He's extremely good at adapting to change, even if it's stressful. Is this an S-type thing, living in the moment and all?
 

Amargith

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Another thing I'd like to point out is that he's very ADAPTABLE. He is never the type to get caught off-guard by new situations, even though he's not much of a future-predictor. He's extremely good at adapting to change, even if it's stressful. Is this an S-type thing, living in the moment and all?

That would indicate Se, yes. Could be tertiary Se as an ENTJ :)ninja: [MENTION=10808]andante[/MENTION]), or Se-dom as in ESTP.
 

rav3n

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Hm. Interesting. So he reminds you of Halla74, displays no intuition, displays Se and T functions...hm. Wonder what type he is?
 

Catzilla

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Hm. Interesting. So he reminds you of Halla74, displays no intuition, displays Se and T functions...hm. Wonder what type he is?

It seems ESTP is definitely a possibility, then. For now I'm going to throw the ENTJ candidate out the window, but I still have a few hangups.

After doing a bit of research, it seems that a big difference between ESTPs and ESTJs is that the former is spontaneous and risk-taking, whereas the latter is more conservative and less flexible. From what I've read, it appears that ESTPs are less likely to follow a sense of personal responsibility; however, ESTJs seem to have a stricter set of morals/rules for themselves. One seems more focused on doing what's "fun" while the other is more concerned about what's "right."

Now, as I've said, my boyfriend is not a stiffler like the typical ESTJ appears to be. He likes being spontaneous after he's completed all his responsibilities, and he's a natural jokester. But he's not the "live fast, die young" type of person either... He's VERY responsible and dependable, and lives by a strict array of moral values.

I also heard that ESTPs are more social whereas ESTJs tend to be loners. And well...my boyfriend is NOT the type who feels the need to hang out with lots of people. He's extroverted, but he focuses more on work and close relationships (namely, me and family) than hanging out with multiple people. He's also very picky when choosing friends - if they do something to the point where he finds them incompatible, he WILL drop them. Really though, he doesn't feel the desire to have many friends at all. He's perfectly happy with solitude and a few close relationships, and generally puts his responsibilities first.

He's relatively conservative with money too, if that matters in this analysis. It's true, he DOES NOT wallow in worries about the future - he acts in the here and now. But he DOES take steps to ensure security. He's focused on using his money responsibly so he can gain more stability for the future (we're in a serious relationship and he feels compelled to take care of the both of us financially).

So basically, he likes being spontaneous IN HIS FREE TIME. He is not the type of person to ignore his responsibilities for the sake of risk or fun. And while he is spontaneous, he's still organized too, because organization/structure is practical and functional for him. He's not a stiffler about tiny details and is pretty laid-back, but he cares about WHAT WORKS in the most efficient way.
 

rav3n

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It seems ESTP is definitely a possibility, then. For now I'm going to throw the ENTJ candidate out the window, but I still have a few hangups.

After doing a bit of research, it seems that a big difference between ESTPs and ESTJs is that the former is spontaneous and risk-taking, whereas the latter is more conservative and less flexible. From what I've read, it appears that ESTPs are less likely to follow a sense of personal responsibility; however, ESTJs seem to have a stricter set of morals/rules for themselves. One seems more focused on doing what's "fun" while the other is more concerned about what's "right."

Now, as I've said, my boyfriend is not a stiffler like the typical ESTJ appears to be. He likes being spontaneous after he's completed all his responsibilities, and he's a natural jokester. But he's not the "live fast, die young" type of person either... He's VERY responsible and dependable, and lives by a strict array of moral values.

I also heard that ESTPs are more social whereas ESTJs tend to be loners. And well...my boyfriend is NOT the type who feels the need to hang out with lots of people. He's extroverted, but he focuses more on work and close relationships (namely, me and family) than hanging out with multiple people. He's also very picky when choosing friends - if they do something to the point where he finds them incompatible, he WILL drop them. Really though, he doesn't feel the desire to have many friends at all. He's perfectly happy with solitude and a few close relationships, and generally puts his responsibilities first.

He's relatively conservative with money too, if that matters in this analysis. It's true, he DOES NOT wallow in worries about the future - he acts in the here and now. But he DOES take steps to ensure security. He's focused on using his money responsibly so he can gain more stability for the future (we're in a serious relationship and he feels compelled to take care of the both of us financially).

So basically, he likes being spontaneous IN HIS FREE TIME. He is not the type of person to ignore his responsibilities for the sake of risk or fun. And while he is spontaneous, he's still organized too, because organization/structure is practical and functional for him. He's not a stiffler about tiny details and is pretty laid-back, but he cares about WHAT WORKS in the most efficient way.
Probably [MENTION=6109]Halla74[/MENTION] might be able to shed some light onto whether or not your b/f might be an ESTP.
 

rav3n

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Had a convo with an ESTJ this morning so this thread popped into my mind. To explain ENTJs a bit more, we think from a top down approach that's structured as ever decreasing circles of information. The easiest way to explain something to us is to first provide us with a high level overview that includes outcome. Then progress further into categorical breakdown, then proceed to detail within the breakdowns if necessary. Most often, unless there's real need for detail, we tend to prefer not to bother.

ESTJs will tend to go straight to detail since 'the devil's in the detail'.

As far as ESTP thinking patterns, I don't have the expertise to comment.
 

Catzilla

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Had a convo with an ESTJ this morning so this thread popped into my mind. To explain ENTJs a bit more, we think from a top down approach that's structured as ever decreasing circles of information. The easiest way to explain something to us is to first provide us with a high level overview that includes outcome. Then progress further into categorical breakdown, then proceed to detail within the breakdowns if necessary. Most often, unless there's real need for detail, we tend to prefer not to bother.

ESTJs will tend to go straight to detail since 'the devil's in the detail'.

As far as ESTP thinking patterns, I don't have the expertise to comment.

Ah, I see. I'm DEFINITELY thinking my boyfriend is not an ENTJ now (even though he came out with ENTJ when he took the HumanMetrics test. Probably not the most reliable test, but oh well). I recently found out a friend of mine is an ENTJ, though. While he's just as honest and abrasive as my boyfriend, I can tell that he has a more intuitive pattern of thinking. Big picture thinker, future-oriented, etc. My boyfriend is less concerned with theory and moreso with practical things.

Still unsure on whether he's ESTJ or ESTP, though (I've been talking to Halla a bit about this). My boyfriend is like a rock; he's decisive, loyal and committed, stable and responsible. Yet at the same time, he's spontaneous when he can afford it, adaptable, laid-back and humorous, and doesn't hold personal regard for rules.

If you don't mind, could you tell me a bit more about Te? I don't actually know too much about it, besides the fact that Te users are outspoken about their thoughts and quick to point out logical flaws in others' thinking.
 
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