After doing some research on the differences between INFJs and INFPs, I've become pretty stuck on which type I fit into more. Lately I've been feeling as though I'm half and half, but I've been told that people cannot truly be 2 types.
I've long considered myself an INFJ, particularly because I love it when people open up to me. I like connecting with people on deeper levels and being the person that others go to when they need a shoulder to cry on. Although I can't have all the answers to those who need advice, I still try my best to consider their situation and give my honest input on what steps they should take. I feel at my best when others choose me to confide in. I like figuring out how people's minds work, and make it a point to put myself in their shoes to better understand their perspective. I'm very intuitive, a pattern seeker, focused on the big picture and read between the lines.
I'm pretty selective about who I share myself with, though I'm not extremely shy either. When I first meet someone, I'll open up a little bit so they might open up in return. The things I tell others about myself are highly dependent upon their personality and situation. Here's an example: There was something I did a few years ago that was very wrong and I regret. Well, I recently made a friend who was VERY open with me about himself. Somehow, he was comfortable enough with me to tell me that he did the same act I once committed, and that he was guilty about it. Normally, I would never tell others about what I did (especially not someone I haven't known long), but I told him that I'd been in his shoes before. I felt the need to assure him that he wasn't alone, that I completely understood, and that he could learn from it and move on (even if he could never make up for it). So when I do reveal things about myself (trivial or huge), it's normally with purpose: I seek relation with others. I want to connect to people, and I want them to feel comfortable connecting to me. If there are similar interests, I jump on that. If there AREN'T similar interests/values, though, it's incredibly hard to connect.
So, despite enjoying listening to people...I'm not always in the mood for it. Even if I do connect with a person, I'm not ALWAYS ready to talk to them or be sociable. Depending on the level of dispassion I have in that moment, I might come across as distant and aloof. I often want to just be left alone, especially if I don't personally care for someone. It's a bit paradoxical. I like listening to people, yet...if I don't personally LIKE someone, I'll probably disconnect from them. And I feel really selfish for it; I feel like I SHOULD be there for everyone I get to know, even if I turn out to not entirely care for them. I WANT to care, but oftentimes I don't.
Now, in terms of functions, I'm really not sure if I utilize more Fe or Fi. While I do like connecting with people, I am also quite...well, selfish. I focus a TON on myself, who I really am, where I'm going in life (for instance, I'm just FASCINATED about which type I really am). I seethe inside if I feel that my values are being threatened, and if I'm pushed too hard, I'll either withdraw or blow up. If someone is angering me, I war with myself: Half of me wants to reach out, put myself in their shoes and try to respect them, even if I dislike them. The other half wants to either lash out or withdraw with indignation. While I want to at least UNDERSTAND others, it's always very difficult for me if it's someone I personally dislike (though I'm sure this is the case for most people).
And then there's Ni vs. Ne. While I believe I use Ni more often, I still definitely use Ne (especially if I'm not knowledgeable about a subject and require multiple sources before drawing an intuitive conclusion). While I am a judgmental person by nature, I often try to tell myself not to jump to conclusions about a person. This works only half the time though, it seems...
I'm unsure about whether I'm more Si or Se (could someone explain the difference?), but I THINK I'm more Ti than Te. I usually keep my thoughts to myself if I sense I'll start an argument.
Some other tidbits about me... I like categories, I don't mind labels (or being labeled myself). I'm probably more of a directing type than an informer. I take care not to offend others, especially ones I don't know well. I'm a TERRIBLE procrastinator; I know I should be working on my art portfolio (3D modeling is my specialization), but I'm constantly wracked by laziness. I have an innate desire to travel overseas and help people in third world countries. I think about the future all the time - the future with my boyfriend, if he'll still love me in the coming years, if my career life will be successful, if I'll have children, if I'll travel, if I'll do good in the world... I have a lot of trouble living in the here and now. I'm a worrywart. When I'm upset, I usually talk it out with a loved one depending on the magnitude of my distress (if I'm upset for a relatively short amount of time, I'll probably just burn it off while listening to music). I'm really bad with directions. I'm not fond of small talk (I much prefer deeper conversations), nor am I the "hostess" type who's constantly asking, "Would you like a drink?", "Is it too cold in here?", "Can I get you something?". I tend to expect people to tell me if they need anything. I have a really hard time ending deep relationships. Finishing creative things I start is extremely challenging for me. I don't mind deadlines (I probably wouldn't finish anything without deadlines).
If anyone here has insights, examples, stories etc., let me know. My apologies for the lengthy post.