-She is an extreme planner and organizer. She plans out her specific goals and much of her personal calendar way in advance, and organizes all sorts of events for the pagan community. I like to have a loose sort of plan and then define it when the time comes, and I don't much like to be responsible for other people.
-She is very concerned about proper behavior and what other people think of her. (Fe I am thinking.) I care about these things to some degree, I just consider myself my own authority ultimately, and think my opinion of what is appropriate is just as good as anyone else's.
-She is very concerned about what is ethical. I am too, but I am much less judgmental than she is. I think there is more than one way of looking at things, and often value judgments have nothing to do with it.
-She is much more religious than I am. I am spiritual but not religious. I say I connect with the goddess and god energy, but this is not really in a theistic sense. I think of it more in terms of archetypes.
-She is far more emotional than I am. I don't know if this is an INFJ thing or not, but it is a significant difference between us.
-She is much more sensitive than I am. She often doesn't take jokes very well and gets offended a lot. I like jokes, and don't really get offended at all. The only time I really get offended is if I feel like someone is insulting my intelligence and reasoning ability (and yeah I'm working on that).
Those are the most notable differences. It could be that she is simply an extreme case. Not saying your opinion doesn't make sense, just once again putting information and ideas out there to help type people.