Ok, .....well my freakouts are mainly in my own head, i think they mostly come from a non understanding or unresolve... i can't fit things together... i'm searching internally for things to "fit" but then there are so many possible outcomes/meanings/reasons/intentions... it goes on... rolling like a snowball gather speed with every new idea and direction until i'm in a big heap of wtf! Eventually comes clarity but sometimes there are track works which halt the train and/or impede progress.
Oh gawd, that sounds EXACTLY like most of my freak outs! That's so interesting! What causes these freak outs?
I just thought of what I was like as a little kid before a lot of the enculturation sunk in. The immediate natural reactions to things as opposed to what I thought I should be like. I guess what I was like between age 4-12. Before middle school and beyond.