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What type do you think I am?

What type am I?


  • Total voters
    19

Mal12345

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Yeah, most likely. I don't think I'm ISFJ, at least. I found one description I could relate to, but none of the other ISFJ descriptions I've read sound at all like me.

9w1, unhealthy levels.
 

Silveresque

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9w1, unhealthy levels.

The unhealthy levels of type 9 don't fit me, which is part of why I'm hesitant to type as 9. Unlike 9's, I don't try to deny or ignore my problems under stress, and I'm not so unassertive that I can't stand up for myself. I've been through all the possible types again and again, and I don't think I'm ever going to get anywhere this way, so I'm just going to wait and observe myself for a while and see what happens.
 

Mal12345

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The unhealthy levels of type 9 don't fit me, which is part of why I'm hesitant to type as 9. Unlike 9's, I don't try to deny or ignore my problems under stress, and I'm not so unassertive that I can't stand up for myself. I've been through all the possible types again and again, and I don't think I'm ever going to get anywhere this way, so I'm just going to wait and observe myself for a while and see what happens.

Type 4 has a crisis over identity, but type 9 doesn't even have the crisis because the identity is lacking.
 

Silveresque

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Type 4 has a crisis over identity, but type 9 doesn't even have the crisis because the identity is lacking.

Here's something I posted a while ago on Personality Cafe:

I'm not really sure whether I have a strong sense of identity or not. What exactly is "identity"? Am I not forming and maintaining a sense of identity whenever I introspect and think about my inner world and feelings? I might have trouble answering the question of "Who am I" as well, but that's because words are insufficient. Words can't ever touch the core of my being. They can't ever define me. Still, I can't shake the feeling that there is something missing inside of me, and I can't quite tell what that is.

I've always been on the search for my "true self", but I'm not really sure what that "true self" is like. In my perspective, actions don't make the person, actions come from some distorted version of the "true self" and thus can never truly reveal one's purest nature. When one's actions truly are aligned with this "true self" and are an accurate reflection of it, then one can be said to have achieved self-actualization. So when I say that I'm searching for my "true self", I'm pursuing my goal of self-actualization.

I'm not sure I can really say I have a strong sense of identity at this point because I haven't found my true self. There are so many ways to be, and how can I know which one is the most me? I could word this sentence in a number of ways, but which arrangement would best reflect my identity?

I can't be sure, but I think this sounds more like 4. I need to figure out how I'm supposed to be so that I can get closer to my true self (like the 4's "fantasy self" or "idealized image"), and then I will feel that I've found my identity. The problem I have with 4, though, is that I don't fit the stereotype at all, and I'm generally too self-conscious to try to be unique or stand out.
 

Mal12345

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Here's something I posted a while ago on Personality Cafe:



I can't be sure, but I think this sounds more like 4. I need to figure out how I'm supposed to be so that I can get closer to my true self (like the 4's "fantasy self" or "idealized image"), and then I will feel that I've found my identity. The problem I have with 4, though, is that I don't fit the stereotype at all, and I'm generally too self-conscious to try to be unique or stand out.

As I've said before, the answer to identity is not inside you somewhere. Your identity is located "out there." Typology is taking you in the wrong direction.

Also, you wrote "I'm not so unassertive that I can't stand up for myself." That's not a 9 trait. Yes, I described to you someone named Gerri, a 9 who refused to fight back, and who had somatic symptoms. But then again, she had been institutionalized at one time.

One time Elfboy, who was constantly debating over his type here, mentioned that he impulsively (out of the blue) struck a girl who made a pass at him. That is typical behavior for the 9 at level 7.

Gerri had similar impulsiveness at a much younger age. She described to me not violence but more social things, like sitting at a booth at a dance club and then, out of the blue, diving under the table to hurry out onto the dance floor.
 

Silveresque

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As I've said before, the answer to identity is not inside you somewhere. Your identity is located "out there." Typology is taking you in the wrong direction.

Also, you wrote "I'm not so unassertive that I can't stand up for myself." That's not a 9 trait. Yes, I described to you someone named Gerri, a 9 who refused to fight back, and who had somatic symptoms. But then again, she had been institutionalized at one time.

I've read a pretty detailed description of the level 7 nine from a book. (Unfortunately the preview ends at level 6 nine right now, but it changes frequently, so try tomorrow maybe?) Anyways, I didn't relate to it because some of the main points I found (that I can remember right now) are that they are so neglectful and in denial of their problems that they will not even go to a see a doctor or therapist when they need to, they're unwilling to do anything to help themselves and will stay in an abusive relationship rather than try to leave, and they refuse to even acknowledge the consequences of their neglect. When I said "I'm not so unassertive that I can't stand up for myself", I was referring to how unhealthy 9's are, not 9's in general. If I remember correctly, the level 7 nine is called "The Denying Doormat".

One time Elfboy, who was constantly debating over his type here, mentioned that he impulsively (out of the blue) struck a girl who made a pass at him. That is typical behavior for the 9 at level 7.

Gerri had similar impulsiveness at a much younger age. But she described to me not violence but more social things, like sitting at a booth at a dance club and then, out of the blue, diving under the table to hurry out onto the dance floor.

I don't relate to this kind of impulsive behavior. Are you sure that's a 9 thing and not just something specific to Gerri?
 

Mal12345

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I've read a pretty detailed description of the level 7 nine from a book. (Unfortunately the preview ends at level 6 nine right now, but it changes frequently, so try tomorrow maybe?) Anyways, I didn't relate to it because some of the main points I found (that I can remember right now) are that they are so neglectful and in denial of their problems that they will not even go to a see a doctor or therapist when they need to, they're unwilling to do anything to help themselves and will stay in an abusive relationship rather than try to leave, and they refuse to even acknowledge the consequences of their neglect. When I said "I'm not so unassertive that I can't stand up for myself", I was referring to how unhealthy 9's are, not 9's in general. If I remember correctly, the level 7 nine is called "The Denying Doormat".

Yes, that's the title. Denying doormats (9w1 level 7) still stick up for themselves, impulsively and not out of conscious decision.

I don't relate to this kind of impulsive behavior. Are you sure that's a 9 thing and not just something specific to Gerri?

Gerri didn't relate to it anymore, like I said she was describing the way she used to be before her traumatizing incident that sent her into an institution.

Now you will tell me that you don't identify with it as the way you used to be either, and that you didn't have a traumatizing incident, and that everything is specific to Gerri and has nothing to do with type.

The 9 I am describing comes from the same book you are reading. But I don't have to read the truncated, abridged, and expurgated version on Google Books because I have a physical copy right here in front of me.

It also says this: "All their energy goes toward maintaining their defenses against dealing with reality so that nothing will get to them. This defense, known as repression resistance, is extraordinarily frustrating to deal with and makes it almost impossible to get through to unhealthy Nines." That's exactly the vibe I get from both you and Elfboy.

I get another vibe from various members too. It goes something like, "I don't like you therefore I will find a way to disagree with everything you say."
 

Rasofy

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I think considering RZ is at the unhealthy levels (7+) or even comparing her with Elfboy doesn't make much sense. I mean, she is one of the most peaceful users around. Levels 7+ of any Enneagram are supposed to be notably obnoxious.
 

Silveresque

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Gerri didn't relate to it anymore, like I said she was describing the way she used to be before her traumatizing incident that sent her into an institution.

Now you will tell me that you don't identify with it as the way you used to be either, and that you didn't have a traumatizing incident, and that everything is specific to Gerri and has nothing to do with type.

The 9 I am describing comes from the same book you are reading. But I don't have to read the truncated, abridged, and expurgated version on Google Books because I have a physical copy right here in front of me.

It's a really good book. I want to buy it but I haven't been able to find it in any stores. I wonder if I have to order it online?

Anyways, yes, I will tell you that I have never related to that and didn't have a traumatizing incident. But I don't think what you described about Gerri has nothing to do with type. I think her type affected how she reacted to that traumatizing incident, since in a way, that's what enneagram types are--the patterns that we fall into to cope and deal with stress. Or at least that's one way of looking at it.

However, I'm not sure that spontaneity has anything to do with type 9. Any type can be spontaneous, or not (I'm not particularly spontaneous, and I'm especially reserved in social situations).

It also says this: "All their energy goes toward maintaining their defenses against dealing with reality so that nothing will get to them. This defense, known as repression resistance, is extraordinarily frustrating to deal with and makes it almost impossible to get through to unhealthy Nines." That's exactly the vibe I get from both you and Elfboy.

I'm not sure why you get that vibe from me, and I haven't noticed it in Elfboy either, though I can't say I know him that well. Unhealthy 9's are closed off, but I think I've been pretty open and receptive.

I get another vibe from various members too. It goes something like, "I don't like you therefore I will find a way to disagree with everything you say."

I hope you don't get that vibe from me. I don't dislike you, it's just that sometimes you assume things about me that aren't necessarily true, and I'm not sure where those assumptions come from.
 

Mal12345

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I think considering RZ is at the unhealthy levels (7+) or even comparing her with Elfboy doesn't make much sense. I mean, she is one of the most peaceful users around. Levels 7+ of any Enneagram are supposed to be notably obnoxious.

You're right to say I am "considering" the unhealthy levels. And comparing individuals of the allegedly same type is very common practice around here. But, I hardly believe it is proper to use that method alone. The reason is that it is too easy to assume, axiomatically, that person X is a type 9 therefore person Y is a type 9, when in fact the beginning axiom could be wrong.

I can't help, though, but to make comparisons after establishing a type because it brings up an involuntary flood of associations in me.

I haven't read anything about Unhealthy 9s being obnoxious.
 

Mal12345

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It's a really good book. I want to buy it but I haven't been able to find it in any stores. I wonder if I have to order it online?

There are many available at Amazon, including dozens of variously-priced used editions.

Anyways, yes, I will tell you that I have never related to that and didn't have a traumatizing incident. But I don't think what you described about Gerri has nothing to do with type. I think her type affected how she reacted to that traumatizing incident, since in a way, that's what enneagram types are--the patterns that we fall into to cope and deal with stress. Or at least that's one way of looking at it.

Yes, her personality type determined how she responded to her attempted murder by her own son. And I am assuming she didn't over-react to something relatively minor that wasn't even attempted murder, such as being physically pushed too hard during an assault. But it amounted to the same thing for her, and as a result she completely dissociated herself psychologically from anger. So instead of reacting toward or against others, she had somatic headache pains which I observed on a couple of occasions (because when confronted with an uncomfortable situation she suddenly grabbed her head and said "ow" or something like that). These extremes of type are very illuminating.

However, I'm not sure that spontaneity has anything to do with type 9. Any type can be spontaneous, or not (I'm not particularly spontaneous, and I'm especially reserved in social situations).

Type 9s are extraordinarily laid back. Where some people are impulsive and ADHD all the time, the sudden impulsive reactions of the unhealthy type 9s surprise even them.

At the time Elfboy described to me the slapping or hitting incident, he neglected to volunteer his response to his action. So I had to ask him, pointedly on two occasions, how he reacted to himself. The first time I asked, I didn't get much of an answer back. But the second time, he said his reaction was to think "Whoa, nigger!" His automatic response shocked him and then he had to reign it back in in so he didn't continue hitting her.

I'm not sure why you get that vibe from me, and I haven't noticed it in Elfboy either, though I can't say I know him that well. Unhealthy 9's are closed off, but I think I've been pretty open and receptive.

Unhealthy 9s are not closed off from reality, they are closed off from themselves. They are always open and receptive to others. Gerri's psychological wall defended herself from her own reactions, but then it emerged through a somatic response. (Somatic basically means "to the body.") In my experience, 9s are always active in reality. On the other hand, the more unhealthy they become the fewer chances they take with a reality that might bring up some unpleasant emotional response. As emotionally tough as they appear, they live in psychological glass houses, so they're not about to throw any rocks.

So when I say the 9s need to get back in touch with reality, it is to say they need to find experiences that elicit blocked responses within them. They need to get out and take a chance on a little excitement. This obviously isn't going to happen while engaged in navel-gazing about personality type.


I hope you don't get that vibe from me. I don't dislike you, it's just that sometimes you assume things about me that aren't necessarily true, and I'm not sure where those assumptions come from.

I make predictions based on reading your posts. But as a type 9, you're not going to have any strong personal likes or dislikes anyway.
 

lunalum

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After reading the stuff that you posted in the S vs N thread, I may be finally convinced that you are at least some sort of IN_P.

Not sure about your enneatype but I wouldn't rule out being a 5, or even a 4.
 

Silveresque

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I have some catching up to do. But I must say that I concur with shortnsweet's observations.

Anyway, are we drawing closer to the day of change (perhaps), Revlis? ;) How has being INFP been for you?

INFP seems fine so far. I don't think I'll be changing anytime soon.

P.S. Honestly, everyone needs to take advantage of the Book Depository. http://www.bookdepository.com/Personality-Types-Don-Richard-Riso/9780395798676

Oooh! Thanks for the link. :)
 

Silveresque

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I think I've finally decided on my enneagram type (hopefully for the last time). I'm a 5 because virtually everything fits. I got so caught up in the little details that didn't fit that I couldn't see it...The characteristics of type 9 (being pleasant and agreeable) fit me very well, but that's about as far as it goes. On the other hand, I have pretty much all of the most basic things, including motivations, that make a 5. Add a bit of a 9 flavor and it's a perfect fit.
 

Vizzy

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I'm still convinced that you're a 9 from the agreeableness to the lack of self-identity...but hey, it's not my decision to make. :)
 

Silveresque

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I'm still convinced that you're a 9 from the agreeableness to the lack of self-identity...but hey, it's not my decision to make. :)

Members keep assuming that since I change my type so many times, it must mean I don't know myself very well. But I disagree with this assumption. The real reason I keep mistyping is that I overthink everything and get too focused on the little details, and start doubting my type.

Anyways, especially when I consider what the whole "lack of identity" actually means in a 9, it just doesn't fit.
Of all the personality types, Nines have the most difficulty identifying which type they are because their sense of self is undefined. Average Nines have little sense of who they are apart from those they have identified with; hence, they are usually at a loss to know where to begin to find their type. (As we have seen, either they think they are Fives or Twos or they see a little of themselves in all the types and make no further effort identifying themselves. If they have no guidance, Nines in this predicament usually shrug their shoulders and give up on the Enneagram and, more important, on acquiring self-knowledge.)

The bolded part is something I can't even imagine. I don't see how someone could base their identity on other people and not know themselves apart from that. And I think I've already demonstrated that the last sentence doesn't fit.
 

Mal12345

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The nice thing is that as a type 9 you can be any other type you want to be.
 

Rasofy

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I think I've finally decided on my enneagram type (hopefully for the last time). I'm a 5 because virtually everything fits. I got so caught up in the little details that didn't fit that I couldn't see it...The characteristics of type 9 (being pleasant and agreeable) fit me very well, but that's about as far as it goes. On the other hand, I have pretty much all of the most basic things, including motivations, that make a 5. Add a bit of a 9 flavor and it's a perfect fit.
:thinking: You may be right. Btw perhaps Tri Types are the real deal. :)
 

Rasofy

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I think this could fit.
594: Accepting and intuitive 5. Most sensitive and withdrawn 5, especially if self-preserving. Tends to be remote
This one not so much. The bolded has flaws.
5-9-4: reclusive, modest, discreet and quite dreamy and unassertive, such Fives possess a vast imagination in which they spend most of their time among their theories, fantasies and vivid memories. They have a somewhat bohemian charm to them – they are relaxed, casual, creative and a bit reckless. Usually pleasant and undisturbed on the outside, they hide complex inner worlds in which reality interweaves with fantasy, real with imaginary, the objective with the subjective. These Fives are gentle, sensitive and avoidant and tend to express their anger in a passive-aggressive manner.
typical subtypes: self-preserving, sexual, 5w4
similar tritypes: 5-4-9, 9-5-4, 4-5-9
flavours: laid-back, unconventional, imaginative and random

VS

The 954 is more contemplative and the the 952 will be more focused on others.

9s have a great capacity for depth, they just avoid conflict. Introspective 9s with 5 in the tritype are the intellectual 9s.
Tbh, I think 954 fits better. I think the guides say ''lack of identity'' just because 9s keep avoiding conflicts, but that doesn't mean they can't have solid values - despite the fact that they won't be very assertive about them.
 
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