1. What are 5 key qualities about you, and what is each of their direct opposites?
1) Pick 5 words or short phrases (or as many as you want, but no less than 5) to describe yourself, and explain.
: When the weather itself permits it so, I often engage in solitary walks around the local neighborhood alone with my thoughts. During this time I contemplate on a variety of musings and thoughts, sometimes philosophical in nature, other times wonderings on immediate manner concerning the daily necessities of my life. My head is often a sanctuary of daydreams and imaginations where through the recollection of old data I can come to learn conclusions about myself and things in the world.
: Depending on whom I am around at any present moment I may act in a manner that is both odd and peculiar, but too an extreme extent. I posses some odd quirks but can turn them to my advantage in terms of humor; such as making a slight joke at myself or being a completely dorky smartass.
: I am quiet and often keep to myself; the image of the loner wallflower whom never speaks can embody me quite well. My energy level is always low, and I don't care all too much for the interaction of other people.
: I am a caring individual whom does genuinely love others for its own sake. There have been times where I assisted others with common needs, and other times where I even helped insects (like moving a caterpillar from the middle of the road into the grass lest it dies from something). I also care a great deal for the whole of humanity and for the wellbeing of all people; I love humans and desire to see peace for all of them
: I aspire to one day see things for what they could be; a better self and a better world.
: Where as others may be chained by their prejudices, I often am willing to see things from a variety of perspectives, there by gaining a better sense of clarification. Thus when there is a social problem that many have taken a whole agreement to, I will usually look at the matter from another viewpoint, and possible see things in a better light. Thus what you hate or consider evil, I like and consider good.
: I am usually benevolent and nice to others without any real prejudice; I feel it is best when others people can relate to one another through a pleasant social medium as opposed to hate.
: I often care not to initiate anything productive during the day, and instead indulge in pleasure or waste time with frivolous matters. I lack the drive and motivation to get work done unless seriously needed and prefer the sluggish pace to life.
: I am against rules, norms, and regulations of all sorts against my freedom. I dislike the control of any authority against individuals and their actions, especially if the individual is an extraordinary one or the action is good. the term 'rules are rules' irritates me to no end, and I would prefer to at least see rules changed to accommodate my views on how I want things to be. By breaking the rules, only then shall society progress.
: That inner child never did grow up.
2. Now explain why each of the opposites COULD be you and why it might be GOOD to be that opposite characteristic. Own them even if they are negative traits.
2) Now pick the direct opposite of those and explain how you could be the opposite, and what could be good about it.
: Spending too much time in contemplation can lead to inactivity and becomes quite a bore after quite some time. Sometimes I feel it best to act off of instinct or emotion as opposed to pure thought when the occasion demands it.
: There are times when I appear like any normal person, keeping a low profile and not drawing unnecessary attention to myself.
: Around those who I am close to, those whom I can trust and feel safe around, I can become quite lively and energetic. Although this isn't exactly a natural way for me to act (although perhaps that should be truly said for being 'introverted'?).
: However there are times when I feel nothing but loathing and contempt for others and would even approve the suffering and deaths of many. I see things about the world that disgust me and feel great anger towards the causes of these things. Sometimes this hatred can even manifest in a desire for violent blood-thirst.
: . . . . .
: Well, at times even I can be stubborn when it comes to certain viewpoints, often ones associated with personal feelings and morals.
: At times and concerning certain people(s) I may be extremely cold or passionately aggravated towards them, and even wish upon their pain and suffering. Such is the tricky and often unknowable beast that are inner emotions.
: I can get motivated to accomplish some things sometimes, but not often.
: When I feel as though the bulk of humanity is far too stupid to be left to its own devices, I feel as though I should implement my views as the external framework for how we should operate.
: That outer adult never came to be.
3. What would you say to a 5-year-old child if he or she asked you what the purpose of life is?
Absurd scenario but presupposing that the child is capable of truly asking and understanding such a profound questions, my response would be of such: "Purpose as an absolute is non-existent; what gives one meaning to live may not work for another, thus it is relative depending on what specific individuals want. I would ask you 'What is it that you desire?' and from your response advise you on the best course of action for fulfilling that goal. If perhaps though your more concerned about the purpose of all humanity, I would then advise you to consider, 'What is it that humanity need? What values can be considered of worth to it?'. Ponder that.
4. What type of advice would you give that same child on how to survive in this world?
The necessities to survival wholly depend on your current condition in life; different things may benefit people of various worlds differently. So really the question relies not just on where the child lives, but any other relevant factors concerning his life and goals. Now if I had to give general advice that could work for people of any origin, I would say that your best bet in reliable things are knowledge, free-will, and gutsy convictions.
5. If you were told you only had one year to live from today, and it was 100% guaranteed that you would die exactly 1 year from now, what would you do in that year?
Accomplish a goal that can be attainable in that time frame while ensuring that some amount of people remember me as a legend for all ages. In order to ensure that my being and character is expanded to great lengths, I must ensure that others know of me on a grand scale for what I am and what I have done.
6. Why aren't you doing this now?
Two reasons; current time frame of my life permits me to work on this goal at a slower pace, and I am presently unmotivated to fully work on this goal immediately.
7. What do you really want in your truest self?
To define myself and recreate myself into a more interesting character in this story of life. Personal spiritual growth into a new and better version of who I am in addition to a unique being unlike any other normal person in existence.
8. What have you substituted/settled for compared to what you really want?
I also desire some level of general acceptance upon the audience of life, thus I am at times torn between being what I want to be, and trying to become worthy in the eyes of others. Thus I have become stuck in myself; my true being hidden underneath a shell.
9. What are your defense mechanisms?
In times of great stress or unpleasant moments, I am prone to thoughts of nihilism, violence, and paranoia. I become fearful of what might occur in the future, and the worst case scenarios possibilities plague me inside my head. I may also feel vindictive towards others whom may be a cause of my suffering, or wonder whether there was meaning in anything at all.
10. What are some good habits that are needed for living a healthy adult life?
Basic life essentials such as managing money properly, paying bills, buying good food, etc. Although that could apply to most people; personally good habits for me include tranquil areas where I can take walks, food that excites the sense of taste, art of the highest quality, and reliable intellectual outlets of knowledge.
11. What are you like in relaxed and non-threatening situations?
Relaxed, fairly open, pleasant, funny, and chill.
12. What does your heart feel like it needs and wants?
A desire to be free and reveal all its emotions without censorship or limitation.
13. What condition is your heart in right now?
Yearning for that greatness of pure freedom.
14. What does your head say it needs and wants?
To feel secure and safe in this dangerous world.
15. What condition is your mind in right now?
Disorganized in terms of independent thought and currently reliant on the wisdom of others.
16. What does your body say it needs and wants?
To follow its instincts and experience all of life's extraordinary pleasures.
17. What is the condition of your body right now?
Slightly out of shape and tired.
18. Which do you trust the most in making an important decision between your head, body, and heart? Why?
The heart, for all meaning and value springs forth from it.
19. Which do you trust the least in making an important decision between your head, body, and heart? Why?
None; both the head and the gut fulfill essential services to me of equal value.
20. What is your predominant fault?
That would be my idealism; I fear that one day it will eventually become my downfall. I see things in the world for what they could be and aspire to be an individual whom makes that ideal a reality, but any motivations towards practical application of this goal is offset by immediate laziness. I lack knowledge on certain things in addition to little drive, leaving me stuck to contemplate my concrete past or possible future.
21. Think of a time when you felt at ease and connected to yourself and others. What did you think about yourself, others, and the entire world during this time?
There were times in my life where I could associate with close family and friends in sheer harmony and peace. Endless hours of fun and play were all that mattered and there was in addition of a shared bonding, a nirvana that most only can dream about.
22. Think of a time when you felt anxious and disconnected from yourself and others. What did you think about yourself, others, and the entire world during this time?
There were many more times where I felt distanced from my peers, as though I was nothing more than an alien to them. They did not truly care about me and there was no connection nor warmth.
23. What is an addiction or urge that seems to drive you as almost as if you’re not in control? Almost like an alien force that drives or pushes you down.
I wouldn't say that I am entirely beyond control of my base urges, in fact I have very good control of them, but there are two very powerful forces at work within me; a violent blood-thirst of savagery and wildness, and a desire for sexual gratification. And as much as I want to embrace both, I keep a tight rein on both them lest their destructiveness brings forth an untimely end for me.
24. What things do you feel you cannot do because they might jeopardize your survival?
I can't do anything that might risk my future; I desire to see my name engraved into the pages of history, and cannot achieve that if I act recklessly and risk imprisonment or death. Yet ironically although my feelings desire grand recognition, my feelings also desire to act in the moment and unleash themselves upon those whom would attempt to control me.
25. What do you need in your life to face your fears?
I need more strength, more resources that can keep me safe and prepared.
26. What is your own personal mission statement?
To be remembered for all of history, to be an unshackled free spirit, and to reform the world in my image.
3) What are your interests? Why?
Psychology, typology, history, philosophy, humanity, politics, video games, anime, movies, television, internet forums, daydreaming, walking, eating, masturbation, music, and comics (manga). All these things bring me either understanding of the world, or direct embracement of it; that alone gives them value to me.
4) What do you want out of life?
Greatness; I do not want the basic normal life that so many other desire, I want something more than that; to become a great being and make my presence known, and to change things for how I want them to be.
5) What can you not do, because it might jeopardize your survival?
Mentioned previously; same response.
6) What do you like in other people? Why?
Figuratively speaking, a person with balls. Someone who has the force of will that few other possess, but also someone who is kind and understanding towards others. For those of you familiar with Japanese anime, characters like Light Yagami from Death Note, Goku from DBZ or Kamina from Gurren Lagann are primary examples.
7) What do you dislike in other people? Why?
Those whom are bossy in their demands of order and try to command me. Those who favor rules above all else and demand strict and blind following of them. Uncaring assholes who don't feel for larger groups of other people or are generally depraved outside of their rigid and idiot morals. And sheeple; I fucking hate sheep.
8) What would your ideal partner be like?
One who could complete me in every possible way; she would possess the motivation to get things done that I lack, and have the ability to assist organization of my goals. She would trust me completely (even to the point of worship) and be by my side at all times; of course I would hold great trust in her as well.
9) Do you enjoy comfort, sensory indulgence, relaxation? Are you physically hedonistic (parties, dancing, binges, good eating, etc.)? Do you focus finely on physical sensations, carefully savoring them?
Typically I partake in a variety of matters that induce pleasure and comfort; from ravenously eating many meals and deserts, to constantly listening to music, to ensuring that furniture is relaxing, to masturbation. I enjoy pleasure simply for what it is and indulge in it when I feel like. However, pleasure in of itself is not the most important thing in the world, as some of the greater things in life require some pain and discomfort.
10) Do you find yourself neglecting bodily concerns and pushing your body beyond reasonable limits (like skipping sleep or meals or the like)? If so, do you appreciate being encouraged to slow down and take care of yourself, or does it make you feel annoyed or mollycoddled?
Not that often do I neglect bodily concerns. Although if the occasion demands it, missing a meal or depriving myself while focused on a goal of great importance is usually fine.
11) Do you focus more on what you need to take care of at the moment, or on the end goal? Do you prefer an attitude of leaving no stone left unturned, or do you only focus on what you feel is necessary to reach your end goals? Are you thorough or sloppy? If neither applies to you, which do you prefer in other people?
This question seems to presuppose that only one method of discourse could ever be of real value, for I don't place too much faith in one or the other. If I care for something of great value, then I may go to great lengths to see that my work is perfect to my liking. But otherwise I'm more concerned with just getting things done however I see fit; if the process is sloppy and imperfect then it does not matter at all, so long as things are completed.
12) Are you forever chasing after new ideas and possibilities, or do you prefer dreaming up imaginative scenarios and fully fleshed-out plans? If neither applies to you, which do you prefer in other people?
Although I embrace modes of intuition, I generally seek ideas that are the linear outcome of possible events concerning the relation between various agents and their actions. I imagine the way things could possibly be, and the ramifications of how those event could unfold and influence other events.
13) Do you look for the hidden implications of concepts in analysis, and what they lead to? Or do you prefer to examine how concepts relate to each other? If neither applies to you, which do you prefer in other people?
Again I do use both methods of intuition. I have a tendency to sometimes notice patterns when grasping the big picture and it observe the relation between how various concepts (especially the connection between the real and the conceptual) relate to others. Although I sometimes wonder; it seems as though through observance of the world that things occur in patterns and formalized relations; a sort of 'cause and effect' if you will. But I also wonder if this way of viewing the world is perhaps skewed; that objectively the world doesn't operate in such a fashion but I merely perceive it to be that way because of a subjective distortion and desire for cosmic order. But overall, I generally favor more so ideas and concepts that derive vital information concerning the relations between things in the world and how those ideas and concepts can be used to my advantage as opposed to just various random possibilities.
14) Do you solve all variables, difficulties and contingencies as they come up? Or do you prefer to pick the most likely outcome or most likely conclusion and plan with it in mind?
Well the resolution to the question wholly depends on the specific situation in which I would have to choose between one method of intuition and the other. In general I usually consider various routes as to which I can solve a problem and will probably take whatever course of action that I feel is best for resolving the problem.
15) Are you prone to uncertainty or indecisiveness? When you have multiple opportunities to choose from, do you analyze them all? Or do you want to cut out the ones that aren’t likely or are least likely; pick just one?
At times, yes, I am prone to being unsure about things, but generally I will keep my options open and procrastinate on matters that are not urgent. In terms of multiple options I may consider each possibility and what it may lead to and place value in the ones that will bring the best possible result; usually this process is done through elimination until I have one or two options to choose from.
16) Are you open to any avenue that might offer potential opportunities? Or do you prefer to make sure the odds are in favor of a new avenue bringing benefits?
I would much prefer that possibility come with practicality; that the path I take actually leads to something worthwhile, or at least of personal value to me.
17) Are you assertive? Aggressive? Do you like it when other people are?
I desire to be more outspoken and brash, but sadly I am not for I find myself too shy and mellow to engage in such behavior. I only appreciate it in other individuals when they know how to do it right, and dislike it when they do it wrong.
18) Are you able to relax? Or are you restless and fidgety?
I'm able to relax fairly easily, in physical terms anyway. Mentally I can't stop bouncing around ideas and daydreams inside my head.
19) Do you prefer concepts, principles, rules, procedures, etc. to be precise and lack ambiguity, or do you prefer simple solutions that offer (or as long as they offer) greater efficiency and productivity?
I would rather prefer the latter in contemporary settings; rules that are open to interpretation and allow me freedom to complete things the way I want them to are far more favorable than specific rules that only hinder my goals.
20) Are you a practical person in general? Elaborate.
Slightly at times, but overall not really. I'm often too imaginative and dreamy to care for purely practical manners, although I would like to be more practical than I am now.
21) Are you passionate? Emotional? Given to performance or histrionics? Do you enjoy those qualities in other people?
I'm only passionate inwardly, concerning how I feel about certain things and people in the world. I'm not what I would call outwardly emotional nor given to performance or histrionics, but I can be open and friendly with others; I know how to bring a dorky charm to any atmosphere that I feel comfortable in and be open with others, although this only applies to those whom I am not shy around. I personally do like those who express emotion (in a sort of romanticist sort of fashion, not over-the-top emo bull-shit). I do aspire one day to become even more open than I am now and reveal my inner emotions fully and without censorship nor shame.
22) Are you aware of when you're stepping on other peoples' toes, or offend them? When you're not liked?
It varies; sometimes I am very aware of other's feelings and seek to create harmony, other times I willingly act ruse much to the contempt of those immediately around me.
23) Are you sensitive to others being emotionally hurt or offended?
Maybe, it depends on the person and whether I actually feel anything. Usually I am polite in general, but I may be a jerk or callous towards others when I see fit.
24) Would you say that the status of your personal relationships with people, your distance to them, is an important criterion for guiding your behavior?
No, I am whatever I want to be regardless of who they are.