Dissecting my instinctuals

[Rim]

Hey there

I'm an INFP 6w7 4w5 9w1 and I'm completely lost when it comes to my instinctual stacking.

I tried the following test http://similarminds.com/variant.html and it came out 66% SP, 66% SX, 66% SO...at which point I went WTF!!??

Based on me reading about sx, so and sp on different websites and blogs (yeah I did my research)..this is how much I relate to each:

SP - I'm disorganized and my room tends to end up looking like dump, which at one point will bother me enough to clean up. Usually the dust is thick on the shelves :\ and I don't really bother with dusting or cleaning much meh....

I love food and cooking XD thank God I have a fast metabolism! My best friend and I have this way of making each other hungry all the time lol. Food is a favorite topic. It has to be good food thou we don't eat just anything, it is more about stimulating the senses then actual nourishment :\. I have very irregular eating habits thou...most of the time I forget breakfast.

If I walk into a room or some place (doesn't matter) I'm instantly aware of the dryness of the air, temperature, the feel of the place, how the colors and the content merges to create the feel of the place. Stuff like this has a major influence on my mood...if I don't like the feel of my surroundings I can shut down, become apathetic, bored and a whole range of other moods. The opposite is also true.

However I don't notice if there is a draft :\ and I have had girlfriends in the past who were freezing their ass off at temperature I found very comfortable. ^^ I tolerate the cold really well, have a higher then average pain tolerance...but hot weather simply kills me. I can barely function in summer and no I don't really like sunshine :\ tolerate it as far as needing sunshine for vitamin D.

yeah I'm a night owl and have very irregular sleeping habits and an unhealthy approach to exercise, at least I eat well, don't smoke, drink much or do any harmful substances. I don't hoard resources and have never really thought about finances and resources up till recently. Generally I watch my health, but its more of a "meh its good enough' approach.

SO - well...I have moderate social anxiety. I am worried about how people see me and I'm paranoid about being judged or laughed at -.- because I absolutely suck at being social. I don't get how I should behave in a way that isn't strange or awkward and because I'm withdrawn and reclusive I'm not really up to date with social stuff...so sometimes I don't get stuff at all -.-.

I also don't understand what makes me stand out in a weird way so much. People like me because my vibe turns friendly once someone gets up the courage to actually look past my seemingly arrogant and distant nature and talk to me....BUT...and this is a big but...with most people I'm just superficially friendly because I don't feel like me and the other person will mix well. In general I'm superficial with all guys and don't really care much (the exception is my brother). My deep relationships have been with women only :\...no I'm not gay.

Regarding fitting in...well its more along the lines of me wanting to be accepted by the individuals I care about. It doesn't matter if we are in the same group or not, who cares ^^ just don't reject me plz.

SX - As I said I don't care about guys much, but love girls and I need deep relationships. People who are too defensive, with whom I can not get on a deeper level will end up boring me and then they complain why I don't keep in touch.

I crave intense feeling experiences and there is nothing better then those, I'm very idealistic and I have left a very long term romantic relationship to be by myself, alone...just because it turned out not to be what I was searching for..it fell too short from the ideal and I couldn't function in it anymore. So yeah I'd rather be alone then with someone I stopped considering as a SO. (I know this sounds dreadful -.- I'm sorry). Sex for me is also something special, something more then just sex, its a "becoming one" with the other person. If I fall out of love I stop needing it with the other person...its strange.

I do not seem to have the vibe of an Sx first of that I am sure. I get addicted to non physical experiences very easily. If something interests me enough..then there is no stopping me. I can be focused on it and will forget sleeping and eating, delay going to the bathroom and other things. Discovering personality has been such a thing, also my first girlfriend, my second one and the third one...basically the object I desire makes me addicted until I get bored and move on -.-...gah I always neglect everything else when I find someone or something interesting.

^^ sorry for the TL;DR, hope someone can make sense of this mess :\ cuz I can't.

<___< damn this post makes me look like such a dick...which I'm not....

 

[skylights]

it might be easier instead of matching up to certain criteria (i get the feeling this is kind of how you are looking at it?) to think about what "arena" of life occupies the most of your cognitive energy.

i read somewhere that you can think of your variants as where you instinctively apply the most attention to... i guess you could say your place in the whole (social), your place as compared with other individuals (sexual), or your place in respect to your own preferences (self-preservation). and which throws you off the most if your status is displeasing to you.

eg i don't know that i necessarily have the supposed sx-first vibe, but i know that i'm sx first because intimate relationships take up the vast majority of my intentional behavior and general headspace. i always prioritize the relationships first and i have a very, very strong read on the "atmosphere" between myself and another person. if i sense any sort of tension between myself and my SO (especially as a 6w7, if i even sense any impending tension between us), i have a very, very hard time attending to anything else but resolving that.

your description of the "whole" atmosphere of a room sounds very Ne, lol.

also your post doesn't make you sound like a dick.

if i had to guess i'd say it sounds like you're leaning sp-first.

 

[Rim]

it might be easier instead of matching up to certain criteria (i get the feeling this is kind of how you are looking at it?) to think about what "arena" of life occupies the most of your cognitive energy.

i read somewhere that you can think of your variants as where you instinctively apply the most attention to... i guess you could say your place in the whole (social), your place as compared with other individuals (sexual), or your place in respect to your own preferences (self-preservation). and which throws you off the most if your status is displeasing to you.

eg i don't know that i necessarily have the supposed sx-first vibe, but i know that i'm sx first because intimate relationships take up the vast majority of my intentional behavior and general headspace. i always prioritize the relationships first and i have a very, very strong read on the "atmosphere" between myself and another person. if i sense any sort of tension between myself and my SO (especially as a 6w7, if i even sense any impending tension between us), i have a very, very hard time attending to anything else but resolving that.

your description of the "whole" atmosphere of a room sounds very Ne, lol.

also your post doesn't make you sound like a dick.

if i had to guess i'd say it sounds like you're leaning sp-first.

thx for reading and commenting. I know the post is long.

Hmm, yeah I think you might be right about SP first. I'll need to think about that.

Regarding where my attention drifts...well this depends on the situation ^^ and I'm not sure. Need to think about this some more.

^^ curses type 6 doubts.

Ok I thought about it and came up with this:

SP first
SX second
SO last

I was considering SO first or second because of my social anxiety...but honestly even if I get past it I have no need to belong. I'm just afraid of being judged :\....and its mainly just a phobic 6 thing it seems.

SP/SX or SP/SO that is the real question now...

SP makes the most sense since I'm an introvert. Most 6w7s I see are Es.