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  1. #111
    Rainy Day Woman MDP2525's Avatar
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    I get what you are saying but my SO is an ESTJ and this is how I see it:

    Quote Originally Posted by uncommonentity View Post
    It's just an opinion based on personal experience and the following:

    May be unaware or uncaring of how they come across to others. Yes. The flip side of this that I've seen is they have the ability to stand up for others against a ton of pressure. They can be very unselfish and downright brave fighting for a cause or an underdog.
    May deliberately bully people into behaving a certain way (with the justification that they're enforcing a principle.)Eh. I haven't experienced ESTJ's as bullys yet I can see how a less assertive person would feel this way. If you say your peace and stand your ground you'll gain respect by them.
    May quickly dismiss input from others without really considering it. True.
    May have difficulty communicating their thoughts and feelings to others. I knew one ESTJ who had this issue and my current SO absolutely the opposite.
    Maybe have difficulty understanding the importance of considering people's feelings, and trying to meet their emotional needs. True. However, most thinkers share this trait.
    May hold grudges, and have difficulty forgiving people. I don't see them holding grudges but once you've crossed them they don't give you another chance.
    May have an intense and quick temper. They get annoyed very easily but they are more like a steam engine than an explosion.
    May be highly controlling towards others. I've found the roots of ESTJ's "controlling behavior" is more a vigilance with your safety and well-being, although it can be overwhelming at times it is not an abusive, possessive control. However, any unhealthy person could show abusive characteristics and it's important to keep an eye out for possessiveness and jealousy in any relationship.
    May be unable to place value on individual life. I don't understand this one.
    May be unable to see the long-term impact of their behavior. Sure. Many sensors share this trait.
    On the topic of this thread. Any good quality is tempered by seemingly weak one depending upon the view. A confident man may be stubborn. A beautiful, well put together woman may be materialistic. It's almost impossible to have perfectly balanced strong qualities and if they are...run....those people are sociopaths.
    ~luck favors the ready~


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  2. #112
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by uncommonentity View Post
    It's just an opinion based on personal experience and the following:

    May be unaware or uncaring of how they come across to others.
    May deliberately bully people into behaving a certain way (with the justification that they're enforcing a principle.)
    May quickly dismiss input from others without really considering it.
    May have difficulty communicating their thoughts and feelings to others.
    Maybe have difficulty understanding the importance of considering people's feelings, and trying to meet their emotional needs.

    May hold grudges, and have difficulty forgiving people.
    May have an intense and quick temper.
    May be highly controlling towards others.
    May be unable to place value on individual life.
    May be unable to see the long-term impact of their behavior.
    Some of this is true. Some of it is almost never true. Some of it is not type-related at all. And some of it is only true with unhealthy ESTJs. Regardless, none of that behavior makes someone "not human". I would say that
    1) All of that behavior is human, as history shows;
    2) If all your experience with ESTJs shows that they don't value human life, then your experience must be very limited indeed because that trait is not, nor will it ever be, type related; and
    3) Your word choice was offensive, and more than a bit hypocritical, since I have seen the bolded in almost every INTJ I know. Would you consider yourself "not human enough", too? Or do you consider yourself more warm-hearted than ESTJs?
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



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  3. #113
    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Theoretically, he's just plain masculine.
    Realistically, he's probably rather sensitive and caring, but not as heavy on the "taking care of things" side.
    06/13 10:51:03 five sounds: you!!!
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  4. #114

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    My ideal partner is exactly like me... but female. The last thing I want to do is 'meet in the middle' or 'compromise' and other nonsense. I want it my way... I mean our way...

  5. #115
    Glycerine
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    @wolfy: ISFP 9 or in like a twilight zone-ish way, ESFJ.

  6. #116
    Secret Sex Freak Hazashin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EJCC View Post
    Some of this is true. Some of it is almost never true. Some of it is not type-related at all. And some of it is only true with unhealthy ESTJs. Regardless, none of that behavior makes someone "not human". I would say that
    1) All of that behavior is human, as history shows;
    2) If all your experience with ESTJs shows that they don't value human life, then your experience must be very limited indeed because that trait is not, nor will it ever be, type related; and
    3) Your word choice was offensive, and more than a bit hypocritical, since I have seen the bolded in almost every INTJ I know. Would you consider yourself "not human enough", too? Or do you consider yourself more warm-hearted than ESTJs?
    Well, can you agree that ESTJs are defensive?
    MBTI: INFP
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    Fi > Ne > Ti > Fe > Se > Si > Te > Ni

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  7. #117
    likes this gromit's Avatar
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    Someone type mine!

    Quote Originally Posted by gromit View Post
    Here is what I posted in other threads:

    1. Be fun and interesting and sexy
    2. Let me be myself
    3. Respect and support me
    4. Understand the value of my other relationships
    5. Similar spirituality/belief in God
    6. Loyalty

    I’d prefer to be with somebody who would support me, not hinder me in positive changes I’m trying to implement in my life, also make me examine things I may have assumed incorrectly. I would also like it if they call me out on shit, like if I'm being ridiculous or something. I'd hopefully do the same!

    I wouldn't mind someone to push me athletically/physically - like if we are hiking or working out or something. I actually love that playful sort of competition, pushing each other to do more, longer, faster, whatever...

    Also, thoughtful and reflective.
    Your kisses, sweeter than honey. But guess what, so is my money.

  8. #118
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    Quote Originally Posted by gromit View Post
    Someone type mine!
    Hmmm...an ENFJ with well developed Se that they geared toward athletic competition or an ESFJ with well-developed Ne so they might be more reflective about looking at things from different angles.

    I think both would be loyal, supportive, call you out on your bullshit, push you to do your best, and understand the need to have other friends/family.

    Although similar spirituality/belief in God has nothing to do with type and like someone already mentioned these could easily be the traits of many types who are healthy...what about an ESTP with strong Fe values?

  9. #119
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hazashin View Post
    Well, can you agree that ESTJs are defensive?
    Well, right now I am, but I'm in a bad mood, and I've had it up to here with the sort of stereotyping that I was reacting to. Maybe it's because there's been more of that stereotyping on the forum than usual. Maybe it's because there hasn't been as much activity on my ESTJ thread recently. Maybe it's just that I need more sleep. But I swear to god. How hard is it for people to learn that there is only so much that the MBTI predicts with any accuracy??

    I try so hard to be helpful. I have maintained my advice thread for two straight years now. It has more pages than some novels do. And I've kept it all going because I genuinely care about people and want to help them. So forgive me if I can't tolerate someone calling me "not human enough" -- and essentially calling me heartless, saying that I don't care if people live or die, let alone if they live happily. I find that presumptuous, hurtful and insulting.
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
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    want to ask me something? go for it!

  10. #120
    this is my winter song EJCC's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by gromit View Post
    Someone type mine!
    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Hmmm...an ENFJ with well developed Se that they geared toward athletic competition or an ESFJ with well-developed Ne so they might be more reflective about looking at things from different angles.

    I think both would be loyal, supportive, call you out on your bullshit, push you to do your best, and understand the need to have other friends/family.
    ^ This. Maybe even a nice, open-minded STJ?
    ~ g e t f e s t i v e ! ~


    EJCC: "The Big Questions in my life right now: 1) What am I willing to live with? 2) What do I have to live with? 3) What can I change for the better?"
    Coriolis: "Is that the ESTJ Serenity Prayer?"



    ESTJ - LSE - ESTj (mbti/socionics)
    1w2/7w6/3w4 so/sx (enneagram)
    want to ask me something? go for it!

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