I have an idea of what type my friend is, but I’ll put it at the end of this post, so you can form your own conclusions first.
-People being consistent and considerate (especially considerate) is very important to her. She gets really upset about bad behaviour, people being users and such.
-Very private about romantic feelings and the like; she definitely likes men, but dates very little (like me and many of my friends, though, as we tend to take relationships ultra-seriously and anyway not meet many people we’re drawn to seriously) and is very reserved about anything to do with her romantic life or feelings. It’s something I can talk about with her in the abstract (ie. “men are commitment-phobes” ) but not really beyond that.
-Quite often admits to being emotionally over-stretched, very sensitive, etc…but I think she only admits to this with a very few people, and to a casual observer, you wouldn’t know it. She looks reserved, unflappable and a bit tough.
-She can be very prickly and even surprisingly insensitive. I think it’s when she’s already feeling stressed or irritated, and especially somewhere like Facebook, she’s sometimes made unnecessarily mean comments that have surprised me. Not often, but still. It’s like sometimes she doesn’t know how she comes across. I have glimpsed her getting openly upset a few times but I think she had already been stressed and felt pushed to the limit.
-I think some people who don’t know her well find her chilly and prickly. I happen to know that she’s actually extremely caring and she’s one of the people in my life I consider like a rock. We’ve known each other six years and it was a slow developing friendship, ie. we were more like good acquaintances for two or three years but gradually got closer. She was one of the first people in this city who reached out to me, though. Although the friendship developed slowly I think there may have been an element of kindred spirits spotting each other.
-Loves culture, books etc. A similar mix to me, tending to the romantic, epic, classic, deep and thoughtful.
-She seems so down to earth but we’ve proved to have similar unconventional ideas about buildings holding an aura/feeling related to events that have happened there, psychic abilities, and these sorts of things.
-Funny sense of humour. We often text each other about weird happenings in our city (and there are a lot of them), funny things that local politicians have said and that kind of thing.
…I think she’s likely to be a fellow INFJ. I wonder about INTJ as well, but she seems too sensitive, under the reserved exterior – and isn’t that typical INFJ? She probably has a “colder” and “pricklier” exterior than I do but I know I can come across tough and sometimes chilly too, so… Plus, she’s English and she is my most English friend. She has the reserve, the tendency to slow-developing friendships, etc.