Have fun typing me, should be interesting to see the results
1. What are 5 key qualities about you, and what is each of their direct opposites?
Example: “I am nice. The opposite of that would be cruel.”
* I am open about my life. The opposite would be "secretive".
* I am passive. The opposite would be "domineering".
* I am careful. The opposite would be "reckless".
* I am open-minded. The opposite would be "close-minded".
* I am curious. The opposite would be "stagnant".
2. Now explain why each of the opposites COULD be you and why it might be GOOD to be that opposite characteristic. Own them even if they are negative traits.
Example: “I am nice. The opposite of that would be cruel. I guess I can be cruel because I never tip waiters. Tipping waiters encourages them to stay at these jobs ‘….’”
*I can be secretive, if I think/feel that the person would misuse/abuse my trust
*I can be reckless, usually when I am stressed and think 'it's all meaningless anyway why should I care?"
* I can be domineering when expressing a viewpoint, but I've realised such arrogance is not only annoying but inhibits social interaction, but I don't think the other extreme of being passive is that good either... maybe a balance is needed?.
3. What would you say to a 5-year-old child if he or she asked you what the purpose of life is?
Note: You’re talking to a young child so keep the answer short and brief.
"Ultimately, you will have to find your own purpose to life, no-one will give you answers, but never be afraid to question, think for yourself, be curious, speak your mind, and be enthusiastic, the world has it's good moments despite the amount of suffering the heart has to go through"
4. What type of advice would you give that same child on how to survive in this world?
Note: You’re talking to a young child so keep the answer short and brief.
"NEVER be afraid to question authority, no one has power over you, rules are arbitrary unless logically sound, the vast amount of people in this world are tawdry, which can be disappointing but there are rare gems to be found, Always be yourself despite opposition from society, question everything as the majourity of people are wrong, and be honest; if the emperor has no clothes, he has no clothes"
5. If you were told you only had one year to live from today, and it was 100% guaranteed that you would die exactly 1 year from now, what would you do in that year?
Note: Your health will be fine all the way up to the end.
Well since i've apparently met God, thanks for telling me this information and giving humanity the cold shoulder. But If I had a year to live, I would give up everything I own, travel to the world, *attempt* to make new friends, reconcile the heart, and try to seek wisdom from whomever I can, which ultimately allows me to accept my fate, Oh, and maybe write a book and not let procrastination get in the way...
6. Why aren't you doing this now?
for the most part? a deep sense of inferiority that I haven't the intellect, nor the talent, charisma, social skills, demeanor to accomplish this, but rather it's something i have to work on with time. Plus I lack the dead pieces of tree that people have accepted as a way to exchange goods/commodities/services, which all seems silly to me and very limiting, DAMMIT I WANT TO EXPERIENCE WHAT LIFE HAS TO OFFER! *sad face*
7. What do you really want in your truest self?
the ability to explore without fear of failure, to empathetically connect with people instead of feeling as if I push them away (which maybe is my own rationalisations), to be able to inspire people to utilize their potential and have some sort of 'proof' or validation that I made an impact in the world/ on this person, and to have peace of mind, equanimity is an asset, and frankly I think too much, which I assume is boredom but for some reason I avoid that label 'boredom' though It is very present most of the time, accepting it feels like a character flaw.
8. What have you substituted/settled for compared to what you really want?
Grueling self-criticism, which can be limiting, self-loathing (ah yes food), I use to have issues with accepting feelings as being valid and would intellectualise them but I think I tend to wallow in them now, or maybe ruminate rather.
9. What are your defense mechanisms?
Sometimes people don’t realize what their true defense mechanisms are because they are working at 100% efficiency. You may have to really think about this one.
Another way to look at the question: When you start to feel uncomfortable or anxious about a situation, what do you generally start to do?
Stubbornness to change or accept something as valid until it logically 'works' for me, otherwise what use is it? (which is perhaps unhealthy, but it is a defense mechanism now isn't it?). looking for logical flaws/inconsistencies in someone's argument to 'prove' that their argument is invalid and I shouldn't listen to them until they fix it or can present a better alternative. Over-intellectualizing an experience or an emotion which detaches me from present reality because the present makes me uncomfortable, I like living in my little world of ideas that I can toss around and think of novel things. Perhaps being a bit harsh with jokes, but meh not so much anymore, although I have a very dry, morbid humour.
10. What are some good habits that are needed for living a healthy adult life?
Compassion, generosity, collectivism, and seeing other human beings as people who make mistakes but still deserve respect, dignity, and help and to try to work towards a goal of bettering themselves. On a more personal level, perhaps, not taking the 'self' too personally, that all things are impermanent and one shouldn't cling so much, though clinging to someone who you love feels amazing, they too are impermanent and that is really difficult to accept. Also less "I" more "we" seems to be the best approach to things, while things must make logical sense yes, we have to not think of only ourselves but our impact on others and maybe give a homeless guy some food if you see one
11. What are you like in relaxed and non-threatening situations?
laid-back, very open, very accepting and understanding (to the point of accepting a serial killer that is if he isn't trying to kill me, but understanding him juxtaposed to an emotional response). very 'other-focused', and freely offering information that seems relevant, and really spontaneous, randomness is good to a certain extent, if one is healthy.
12. What does your heart feel like it needs and wants?
acceptance, encouragement to 'go out there' and not feel limited by who I am (whatever the hell that is), to have a kindred spirit whom can venture the depths of the inner world as well as the outer world <3 world travel and having new experiences, though without the feeling as if you aren't 'good' enough for that. There is maybe more to this but I can't think of anything at the moment.
13. What condition is your heart in right now?
lost in a state of feeling inferior to others, though logically I shouldn't (or maybe I should), disappointed that my mind is clinging to it's own delusions of self, a want to accept life without the need to shrink into one's self and not feel as if you're a child, and lastly, to be able to conquer the world and defeat any challenge/obstacle that comes my way.
14. What does your head say it needs and wants?
To implement ideas that stay in your head and you never do, to actually believe that these ideas would work out, to have better concentration and not jump ship from idea to idea and not stay steady, and to not 'feel' as if it is awkward in that it pushes people away when it truly wants someone to connect with, to throw ideas off of and feel as if anything is possible.
15. What condition is your mind in right now?
beyond the head-ache I have right now?, okay, wanting to improve and trying to work on itself in order to mature and improve for the sake of psychological well-being and ultimately to make me happy.
16. What does your body say it needs and wants?
Sleep, but I barely notice my body and what it needs, I'm usually always in my head and I really neglect the body, to not be doing this at 2:30 in the morning but insomnia will forever be present. Maybe to also relax more and not be so jittery, too much energy, I think it's mental energy and it has to get out somehow.
17. What is the condition of your body right now?
alright, sleep-deprived, but alright, and the head-ache I have is killing me, hopefully it isn't something worse like brain cancer, but if that's the case then maybe the year to live thing would be accurate and it'll force me to travel which would be awesome despite y'know dying and whatnot, bring it on!!!
18. Which do you trust the most in making an important decision between your head, body, and heart? Why?
Head then heart not really the body, the head because I don't want to just rush into something without giving it thought and I don't want to feel rejected or that i acted in haste, which wouldn't be helpful as I would start to criticize myself and that never lets up. I'm barely in my body so I don't think it provides any accurate information, besides rare instances of intuition, the senses cannot be trusted... didn't descartes prove this? The Meditations ftw!
19. Which do you trust the least in making an important decision between your head, body, and heart? Why?
Answered above because I didn't look at this question when writing the above... ooops
20. What is your predominant fault?
perhaps my own feelings of inferiority mixed with a stubbornness unless I see some logical way out/to get better, it haunts me, and really limits my growth, not really able to put myself out there for fear of failing big time, plus I may not know enough and eh what good is that, but I've been really trying to over come this and I've realised i'm not as bad as my mind makes me out to be (well at-least I hope not)
21. Think of a time when you felt at ease and connected to yourself and others. What did you think about yourself, others, and the entire world during this time?
Dear god I'm going to sound like a hippie but whatever, but during these moments I feel as if we are all connected, everything is one and we aren't as fucked up as a species as history might seem to make us out to be, we have really amazing potential for change and transformation and hopefully people wake up to this, and when it does happen, life will be pretty freaking sweet.
22. Think of a time when you felt anxious and disconnected from yourself and others. What did you think about yourself, others, and the entire world during this time?
'We, as a species are fucked" would be my response to this, the entire species are some failed experiment and nature is slowly weeding us out, and ugh people are fucking idiots, why haven't they all been killed off? moreover why do I have to experience this, what is the point to it all and if there is some type of god, what kind of sick son of a bitch is he?". << that's when I feel disconnected, when I'm anxious it's much less cynical and I try to reason myself out of this kind of thinking.