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  1. #201
    Glycerine
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post



    Funny, I thought Fi users were all about "avoiding influencing others"...
    It really depends on the intent. Whether or not one tries influence others and on what sorts of things is more dependent the person's values I would say. One of the most controlling people I know in trying to influence people is Fi dom ("everybody needs to be happy and I need fix their problems in order to be happy myself" but on the positive side, she's the most well-meaning person I know) and the least controlling person is also an Fi dom (very laissez faire).
    Last edited by Glycerine; 09-30-2011 at 09:12 AM.

  2. #202
    Senior Member Vizzy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    Good question. I suppose I have a few convergent reasons:

    * My dad is one of those "Everything I do, I do for you" types. And he goes all whenever you argue with him. Mind you, he can argue with others, although he won't yell or anything (unless in traffic ). I feel kinda guilty arguing with someone who feeds and clothes me... (I feel more comfortable disagreeing with my mom, since she can take it. )

    * I'm sensitive to other people's opinions, especially academic ones, so I try not to "impose" myself too much... It's a Golden Rule thing, you know?

    * I want to be liked and to respect people's personal space.

    * I want to avoid scrutiny or embarassment, and withholding my opinion is a way of doing so.

    * I don't really think I've got that much interesting or insightful stuff to say, at least academically.

    * I sometimes fear that any disagreement with people I like will result in them deciding they don't want to be around me anymore. Nutty, I know.

    * Fearing the consequences of revealing my feelings and thoughts.

    * Not being able to articulate myself very well.

    Does that help, Vizzy?
    In my opinion, that shouts 9. You clearly avoid making waves or creating any sort of disturbance - as if your inner stability depends on it. You wouldn't risk this peace with others for anything else - even if it meant not being seen as unique or significant. Does that sound right?
    I think a 4 would strive for specialness and personal-significance first - even (probably especially) if it meant disapproval from others.

    Well, that's my attempt to differentiate 4 and 9, at least.
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  3. #203
    Anew Leaf
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    From the website:

    4 vs. 1

    Focus on feelings = Focus on duties {Well, more like "Focus on private interests"... }

    Self-indulgent = Self-denying {I don't indulge that much in my moods, but I enjoy my personal space}

    Withdrawing from people > Pushing people

    Whimsical < Disciplined {Despite being a bit of a lazy bum }

    Changeable < Constant

    Self-centered = Principled {Kind of a biased question here...}

    Emotionally expressive < Emotionally constrained

    Empathetic > Judgmental {Ditto}

    4 vs. 9

    Intense = Disengaged {Subtly intense but also kind of mellow? More neurotic than anything...}

    Idealize fantasies > Idealize reality

    Negative = Positive {Neither in particular, but I have my moments of slight despair...}

    Explore pain = Deny pain {Wallow privately in pain but also don't sulk that much?}

    Identify with emotions = Detach from emotions {I seem more stoic/disengaged that I am, I guess}

    Pessimistic = Optimistic {Again, neither in particular}

    Conflictual < Avoid conflict

    Misfit > Merges with others

    Dark side = Bright side {Again, neither}

    Authentic < Submissive {Though not entirely}

    Moody = Easy-going {Slightly bitter/neurotic but overall level-headed}
    You're a 9.

  4. #204
    Senior Member Viridian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vizzy View Post
    In my opinion, that shouts 9. You clearly avoid making waves or creating any sort of disturbance - as if your inner stability depends on it. You wouldn't risk this peace with others for anything else - even if it meant not being seen as unique or significant. Does that sound right?
    I think a 4 would strive for specialness and personal-significance first - even (probably especially) if it meant disapproval from others.

    Well, that's my attempt to differentiate 4 and 9, at least.
    That's what I thought, although I think that applies more to 4w3s in particular.

    Do you suppose my answers could also indicate 6 or perhaps 1?

  5. #205
    Senior Member Silveresque's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    That's what I thought, although I think that applies more to 4w3s in particular.

    Do you suppose my answers could also indicate 6 or perhaps 1?
    1's are perfectionists who get critical of themselves and others. 9's are more likely to critical of themselves (self-effacing) but not others. 9's disintegrate to 6, so an average to unhealthy 9 could seem like a 6. Here's a thread that shows some differences between 6 and 9: http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...p/t-28686.html.

  6. #206
    Senior Member Viridian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RevlisZero View Post
    1's are perfectionists who get critical of themselves and others. 9's are more likely to critical of themselves (self-effacing) but not others. 9's disintegrate to 6, so an average to unhealthy 9 could seem like a 6. Here's a thread that shows some differences between 6 and 9: http://www.typologycentral.com/forum...p/t-28686.html.
    Lessee...

    9 vs 6: Nines see sixes are too wound up and need to chill out while sixes see nines as asleep. Nines have much more elastic cognition. Effective communication isn't as important to nines as it is to sixes who need things to be spelled out. Nines are comfortable letting things happen on their own while sixes notice what can go wrong. Sixes being reactive types find it much harder to shield their annoyance from others. When nines feel smaller than their internal resources to deal with a situation, they get to a "what's the point anymore?" paralysis. Sixes lack the presumption of nines.
    Sounds like an even split... Maybe I can call myself an ISFJ 9w1 for now, but keep the "IxFx" label? You guys OK with that?

  7. #207
    Glycerine
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    You don't strike me as a 6 at all. The "wound-up" aspect could be the J talking because the Js nature is to like closure. As much I try to be "laid-back", part of me always craves some sort of closure.

  8. #208
    Anew Leaf
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    Quote Originally Posted by Viridian View Post
    Lessee...



    Sounds like an even split... Maybe I can call myself an ISFJ 9w1 for now, but keep the "IxFx" label? You guys OK with that?
    I don't know if this is intentional, but it's hilarious.

  9. #209
    Senior Member Viridian's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Saturned View Post
    I don't know if this is intentional, but it's hilarious.
    Hah! It wasn't. I just kinda picture the other forumers in this thread as the Monty Python God saying "GET ON WITH IT!"*. No offense, it's just Viridian-O-Vision.

    *Justifiably... Christ almighty, I think this is the longest type thread in this subforum.

  10. #210
    Senior Member Silveresque's Avatar
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    I found this on the Enneagram Institute site:

    Misidentifying Sixes and Nines

    These types are actually frequent mistyped. Sixes and Nines are both concerned with security and with maintaining some kind of status quo situation. They are both family-oriented, and both tend to take modest views of themselves. Their affect, however, is the easiest way to distinguish them.

    In short, Nines like to remain easy-going and unflappable. Nines work steadily at their tasks, but show little sign of being upset by the day's ups and downs. Sixes, on the other hand, cannot easily disguise their feelings. They get more easily worked-up and rattled by mishaps. While Nines can remain silent within their own inner peace, Sixes need to vent with others periodically to discharge their fears and doubts. Sixes are more obviously nervous and defensive when they believe there are problems. Nines remain strangely bland in the face of problems, although beneath the pleasant surface of average Nines, there is stubborn resistance and an unwillingness to be upset or troubled by conflicts or problems. Sixes tend to be suspicious of unknown people and situations–they need to test people before they let them get close. Nines may be protected by the disengagement of their attention, but they tend to be trusting of others–almost to a fault.

    Of course, under stress, when moving in their Direction of Disintegration, Nines will begin to act out some of the behaviors of average Sixes, and for this reason, some Nines will mistype themselves as Sixes. But such periods of overt anxiety generally do not last long. As soon as possible, Nines revert to their more easy going approach to things. Compare Sixes George Bush and Dustin Hoffman with Nines Gerald Ford and Jimmy Stewart.
    Does this help at all?

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