Let's put it in our handy dandy notebook! *DING!*
Okay, enough of that. I had an experience recently that made me wonder about myself. I was driving to my parents' house with the kids on Saturday, and since my shuffle was dead I was flipping through the regular old radio stations. The Classical Station (awesome station btw, highly recommended- they broadcast here and they also stream on the web) was playing Aaron Copland's Appalachian Spring Suite, which I dearly love. So I cranked it up, ignored the children, and proceeded to weep like a little girl.
I don't know what happened, but I can't say it was an unusual reaction for me. I am a cryer, and not just at sad stuff. I crave that deep, physical experience of feeling emotion, and it's one reason I love music. (It's also one reason I stopped going to church, because it alarmed me that I didn't think I was truly present unless I was emotionally moved.)
There's a lot about this particular music that makes me feel strong feelings. Some of it I can't put into words. (I think that's one reason music exists- to express feelings we can't express with words.) It gives me a wistful, joy/sorrow feeling. The passage starting at about 3:10 or so just kills me and I don't understand why.
Here are a few of the things about my reaction to the music that I can identify. Maybe they are clues to my type.
*It reminds me of my mother, as it's one of her favorite pieces too and she adores Copland. She used to sing the hymn Copland used for the melody in the variations section (the first part of that link above, although it's well into the actual piece) to me and my younger siblings as a lullabye and I sing it to my children now. It makes me feel fondly toward her and at the same time gives me a bittersweet, melancholy feeling because I know I won't always have her.
*It reminds me of my time at a Quaker school (the melody is from a traditional Shaker hymn, Simple Gifts, the one my mother sang, and which we sang there at the school). Being at that school, quite literally, shaped me into the person I am today. I don't know who I would be without that experience. Not only was I free for the first time from grades, heavy top-down discipline, and stuff like that- but I felt truly respected and admired by adults, instead of patronized or consumed.
*The lyrics to the song are beautiful and moving to me:
Simplicity, earnestness, and no-bullshit. These are ideals I try to live by.'Tis a gift to be simple
'Tis a gift to be free
'Tis a gift to come 'round where we ought to be
And when we find ourselves in a place just right
We will be in the valley of love and delight
When true simplicity is gained
To bow and to bend, we will not be ashamed
To turn and to turn, it will be our delight
'Til by turning and turning, we come 'round right
*It makes me think about the genius and heart of the man who wrote the music. (I was fortunate to take a music appreciation class with one of his students who teaches at UNC.)
And that's about it. If you can still stand to look me in the eye, tell me what you think this means about my personality!