Type my very cool friend

[SilkRoad]

-Can't decide whether to describe this girl as an introvert or an extrovert. She says she's not the type to make friends at parties, etc. (The very odd thing is that we started our friendship at a party, but we both agree that for both of us this was an exceptional incident.) Yet, to me she is quite a socialite and tends to have a lot of invites, etc. She's sometimes in the mood for a fairly deep conversation over a glass of wine, but she's more likely to prefer going out to see a band or dancing or something.

-A very very talented artist, mainly in the area of illustration/children's books etc. She loves urban landscapes and has the talent for seeing with a very different and unique perspective, and there is usually something rather childlike about it too.

-As far as relationships/guys, she hasn't had many but I think has had quite a few opportunities. She generally just avoids getting involved partly because of strong religious principles combined with the fact that she basically feels at this point like she couldn't commit to a serious relationship (she's in her late 20s.) She has said that she finds the idea of committing to one guy permanently pretty difficult and rather scary.

-Loves small children, has a great way with them so is always helping out her friends who have small kids. She doesn't seem to be hankering after children of her own, though (probably also partly to do with the point above!) and having quite a lot of friends with little kids works well for her.

-Gives off a bit of a ditzy vibe. Tends to be flaky about answering text messages, etc, but confesses that she gets annoyed when others don't answer hers right away...

-For the most part, pretty unsentimental.

-Finds my tendency to answer "Do you want a stick of gum?" with a dissertation on gum-chewing very amusing and slightly irritating.

-Very cool and laid back. I've seldom seen her particularly upset about anything, but it seems to happen occasionally when she feels like people are trying to take advantage of her, or when they don't appreciate her efforts or give her some appropriate recognition.

I tend to think she's ISTP, perhaps a fairly outgoing ISTP. ESTP just doesn't seem to fit. I was leaning toward ISFP because of the artistic talents and the way with children, but she just seems so much more hard-nosed than someone like me. I wondered at first if she might be INFP but now that I know her better, I don't get much of an N vibe off her.

 

[Savage Idealist]

Probably ISFP, or maybe ISTP. ISFP's in particular are the most extroverted of the I's which would explain why she attends party but goes off to do something like see the band or dance. Also declining to commit to a long term relationship because of her values, in addition to being good with children and making kids books leans much closer to F.

 

[Elfboy]

my guess is :
1) INFP
2) ENFP (ENFPs can be very introverted, but we are also at least somewhat outgoing and love a good conversation)
3) ISFP
(she is almost certainly FP)

Enneagram
1) 7w8 (based purely on intuition, something about this woman sounds very 7w8. at the same time, it doesn't sound 7w6 at all)
2) 4w5
3) 5w4
4) 4w3
5) 2w1

Instinctual Variant: SP/SX (possibly SX/SP but I'm leaning strongly toward the former)

 

[SilkRoad]

Interesting... On reflection, ISFP and 7w8 sound quite probable. Wouldn't that be an unusual combination, though?

I really don't think she's an N, though I could be wrong...

 

[Hive]

My guess is ISFP. Although there isn't too much useful information to go on here.

 

[SilkRoad]

My guess is ISFP. Although there isn't too much useful information to go on here.

What else would help more?

 

[Hive]

How she makes decisions, if she's more focused on what possible outcomes there are or the practicality of getting there.

 

[SilkRoad]

How she makes decisions, if she's more focused on what possible outcomes there are or the practicality of getting there.

Probably I don't know her quite well enough to know all the ins and outs. But I can say that she is very much a "things are just going to work out, ultimately" kind of person. And don't sweat the small stuff along the way. She is quite practical - she is partially working as a freelance artist now, as well as a rather dull part-time day job for the last couple of years. She just quit that job and is going to South America for a couple of months to visit her sister and travel. She isn't quite sure what she will be doing when she gets back, but she seems confident enough that she has enough savings, enough freelance work to keep her going at least for a bit, and some good contacts/friends who may be able to help her with some more work and hopefully a bit more in the area of the arts.

I am much, much more likely to get completely wound up if, say, I'm in a position where I have temp work but I never know how long it's going to last or if I might be out of work in a week or two (that was happening to me this time last year.) I envy her take one day at a time approach and her confidence that things will work out. And yet, she doesn't rely on other people to bail her out or make it happen for her so I think she is quite practical too.

She also doesn't like wasting time. She has a busy life and manages to stay pretty focused with her priorities. She tells me she likes to get up early so she can start getting things done, and when she's at home she would rather paint/draw, either for work or just personal satisfaction, than sit around reading or going on the internet.

 

[Hive]

Yeah, I would say ISFP.

 

[wolfy]

With a title like that who am I to disagree with isfp.

 

[SilkRoad]

Hehe. I guess we're probably going with ISFP, then. Is it normal for an ISFP to be unsentimental? Or maybe she isn't so unsentimental, she's just selective about how she shows it. (I'm anything but unsentimental, but I bet some people think I'm pretty hard-nosed...)

 

[wolfy]

I have certain things I am sentimental about but I don't think I am all that sentimental. You'd think a sentimental person would get homesick and that is something I never really experienced.

 

[SilkRoad]

Ok, I'm resurrecting this thread because my friend took one of the tests (not sure which one) and apparently she got INTJ. What the heck? I was like, uh oh...I really don't know her.

However, she did say to me that for some of the questions, she picked qualities/answers that she admires, not necessarily ones that she finds in herself so much (and with some questions on some tests, it's easy to honestly answer them in that way.) I think her dad may be INTJ, or at least INTx. I wondered if she wanted to be more "rational" than she actually is.

I still kind of think she could be IxTP. I have serious doubts as to her being an N. She tends to tease me for over-analyzing, etc. (I don't mind...she's right in so many cases!). It just doesn't seem very INTJ.

I'm still leaning toward ISFP or ISTP. I have my doubts about INTJ despite her test results. I guess INTP is possible but I really doubt N as well. And ISFJ or ISTJ doesn't seem likely at all.

 

[Randomnity]

intj and istp are pretty easily mistyped for each other, if that helps.

 

[SilkRoad]

intj and istp are pretty easily mistyped for each other, if that helps.

Can you tell me why? It's a bit puzzling to me.

 

[Randomnity]

Can you tell me why? It's a bit puzzling to me.

I guess the Ni and to a lesser extent Se commonality, in theory. Also I believe both are chart-the-course interaction style which can make them look similar, especially on first impression. I was considering intj for a while when I figured out that intp was wrong for me. A very good friend of mine is INTJ and in some ways we're shockingly similar (sense of humour, general vibe, things like that) although in other ways we're shockingly different. The differences took longer to figure out than the similarities which were immediately obvious when we met and clicked hardcore.

note: this effect seems to occur exclusively IRL, at least for me. I tend to have a lot in common with INTJs IRL and nothing at all in common with the ones on this forum, for whatever reason. I do not think it's a mistyping thing (at least IRL).

 

[Elfboy]

reading this again, ENFP 7w8 or 4w3 Sx/Sp

 

[Lord Guess]

Definitely FP: she could be either E or I: I tend to withdraw from people a lot, but I am usually energized by being in large groups, and my energy crashes when I'm by myself. Which would you say fits your friend more?

Also, what are the conversations between the two of you like? Are you able to have an abstract discussion with her, without her just kinda nodding and agreeing to what you say? Does she like to bring up things that are going on around you? What are her plans for the future like?

I'm personally leaning towards ENFP, but that's just a hunch.

 

[SilkRoad]

Definitely FP: she could be either E or I: I tend to withdraw from people a lot, but I am usually energized by being in large groups, and my energy crashes when I'm by myself. Which would you say fits your friend more?

Also, what are the conversations between the two of you like? Are you able to have an abstract discussion with her, without her just kinda nodding and agreeing to what you say? Does she like to bring up things that are going on around you? What are her plans for the future like?

I'm personally leaning towards ENFP, but that's just a hunch.

I thought she was an N at first, but after getting to know her better concluded she was probably S. I can find it hard to tell though. She teased me a bit once about my reponse to the question "would you like a stick of gum?". It was the fact that instead of saying "yes" or "no", I gave her my whole life's history in regard to my relationship with chewing gum. She thinks I over-analyze (not that it annoys her, I don't get that impression, more that she finds it amusing and slightly tedious.) On that basis alone I REALLY couldn't see her as something like INTJ.

I told her recently about my parents having to sell my mom's old family home in Finland and we're all kind of upset about it. She was sympathetic, but also said something like "you have to move on in life." We are both half Scandinavian, and she (mostly jokingly) suggested having some sort of drunken blowout to get over the trauma.

She's quite organised (successfully self-employed, etc - though I think for more minor things she is a bit ditzy/unorganized) and at the same time better at going with the flow than I am but lately she has been forced to do that too much (uncertainty with accommodation, work etc) and it's getting to her a bit - it would have got to me sooner though. Plans for the future: definitely not settling down with a hubby and a picket fence, not at this point anyway (she's almost 30). She is definitely quite capable of sticking with a program for a very decent length of time, but I think she always has at least vague plans or ideas for another adventure or a change of pace. She's told me that at least for now she's not keen on commitment or settling down.

She's more observant in a sensory way than I am. Funny little details about a person and that kind of thing, the sort of thing that goes past me because I'm too much in my head. And she is a very talented artist. She describes herself as a loner; she doesn't come across that way as she is quite social and certainly very easy to get along with and fun. (While she also describes me as "easy going" I think she's realised by now that I get more wound up and anxious than she generally does.) But I think she gets her best energy from sitting down and painting for several hours, then getting out of the house and walking. (she told me something to that effect recently.)

I'm still leaning towards ISxP (maybe ISFP but a T-like ISFP...?). I think her INTJ test result is likely to be related to some of the things she'd aspire to be more of. I just have a very hard time indeed seeing her as that type.

 

[Lord Guess]

Yeah, I'd have to agree. ISFP sounds about right.