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I think I might be an ESFJ Help?

liYA

New member
Joined
Sep 25, 2010
Messages
146
I read this and I could easily see how this might be me
http://www.personalvaluation.com/esfj_personality.shtml

I tend to be very pushy and extroverted with my close family

for example my dad wasn't taking care of his health and I would get so angry and demand that he must

and then I took a step back and was like woahh I'm not the mighty judge I need to stop being so controlling
even though in my mind i'm just trying my best to help take care of someone I love

I'm not like this with other people though
I let them live their own lives
unless they do something that's insulting or pick at things that are very important to me
then I will either get all sad or blow up with anger


I might be getting my functions confused

also I don't know if i'm introverted and that's why I need space or if it's because i'm a somewhat control freak and most of the time don't want to impose my beliefs

so really at this point I do not know if I am
INFP, ISFP, or ESFJ

:/

any little unique things you can point out to see if i am really an ESFJ ?
 

Savage Idealist

Permabanned
Joined
Aug 17, 2010
Messages
2,841
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sp/so
Well, from what you've said, F seems like it would be a probability. Also, it isn't unheard of that you may identify with more than one description of a type (depending where you read the particualr description), so the key to that would be either self-analysis, or taking a bunch of tests and comparing result, or providing an entire list of triats that describe you.

So yeah, I really can't say anything for sure until I see test results or written traits of yourself, but I'll be more than willing to help. :)
 

Thalassa

Permabanned
Joined
May 3, 2009
Messages
25,183
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx
ISFP is highly unlikely if you think you're controlling with your ethics, they have strong Fi beliefs too but are unlikely to feel sure about pushing them on others, but surprisingly INFP can be very pushy with their ethics even though it's seemingly one letter difference because they see their ethics as "universal" even when they aren't. INFPs can be surprisingly full of moral superiority in such a way that I never would have guessed before coming to this web site.

I think SFJs can be similarly pushy about moral correctness, and are more of a "caretaker" variety of person...which may explain why you felt a need to push your dad to take care of his health, because you see yourself as a nurturer and caretaker.

The primary difference between S/N is pretty simple: do you prefer theory and feel more comfortable talking about theoretical stuff all day long, or do you learn better by "hands on" or at least in subjects which have practical, real-life application? You'll feel more comfortable with one or the other.

INFPs are pretty dreamy and mystical, or bohemian and individualistic, and ISFPs can be kind of the same way, just with a more "grounded", earthy feel.

But if you see yourself as pushy I would rule ISFP out.

ESFJ is a much, much more practical type.
 

wolfy

awsm
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
12,251
It's more difficult than that. ISFP can feel they are pushy when really they aren't. I care about my dad's health and pushed him to change isn't the same as enforcing your ethics all over the place.

From all the stuff you have posted I would guess infp.
 

Thalassa

Permabanned
Joined
May 3, 2009
Messages
25,183
MBTI Type
ISFP
Enneagram
6w7
Instinctual Variant
sx
Yeah I thought INFP too.

I just can't associate ISFP with pushiness, not just because of what I learned on this site, but because I have this ISFP aunt and she's very "live and let live" and "so what" and accepting and gentle without being passive, because if you actually cross her as an individual or her family then she will become assertive. She's just very down-to-earth and likes to make crafts and read about dream analysis, and she was never especially regimented about running a household like a lot of the SFJ women I grew up around.
 
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