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Type a friend of mine

CuriousFeeling

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I'm debating if this person in question is of the NT or NF variety, because I notice some overlap.

One of my friends is an introvert and shy but at times can seem outgoing. He's got a knack for figuring out what I am going to say next, and tends to think/process information in an abstract yet organized fashion. Family is very important to him, and he's very loyal to his friends. When I first knew him, he was a bit moody and intense, but as time progressed, he's mellowed out. He doesn't show it, but deep down he is a romantic. He has a preference for getting things done quickly, and can figure out how a system works... involving both theories and people. Takes a while for him to warm to you, he seems initially cold, but when you get to know him, he is warm. Very bright person, definitely seems confident in what he knows about, although when it comes to talking about his abilities, he is humble about them, doesn't brag at all. He seems outwardly like an INTJ... but inwardly an INFJ. What type do you guys think he could be most like?
 

Savage Idealist

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One of my friends is an introvert and shy but at times can seem outgoing. He's got a knack for figuring out what I am going to say next, and tends to think/process information in an abstract yet organized fashion Ni. Family is very important to him, and he's very loyal to his friends Fe, maybe Fi. When I first knew him, he was a bit moody and intense, but as time progressed, he's mellowed out. He doesn't show it, but deep down he is a romantic probably F. He has a preference for getting things done quickly, and can figure out how a system works... involving both theories and people Te. Takes a while for him to warm to you, he seems initially cold, T but when you get to know him, he is warm F. Very bright person, definitely seems confident in what he knows about, although when it comes to talking about his abilities, he is humble about them, doesn't brag at all. He seems outwardly like an INTJ... but inwardly an INFJ. What type do you guys think he could be most like?

From what I bolded I think the possibility of INTJ could work; he definitely seems like an Ni dom, and INTJ's use both Te and Fi, in this case it seems his Fi would be fairly developed. Although I wouldn't rule out the possibility of another possible type, just that INTJ seems to fit somewhat well.
 

CuriousFeeling

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So I could be picking up on his tertiary Fi, which is why he seems warm. Might be a well-balanced INTJ. I do know that in times of stress, he gets temperamental and defensive towards what he believes is the right thing to do. Probably the most individualistic person I've ever came across. At times he can be quite blunt. Some of my friends that are aware of MBTI think he's an INFJ, but I get more of a INTJ vibe. Whenever I've said something that was factually incorrect, he would always correct me, which seems much more of an INTJ trait. Could be one of the rare INTJ type 4s.
 

Savage Idealist

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I knwo this might be somewhat of a stretch, but have you considered the idea of him being an ENFP? Under that type his middle functions would still be Fi+Te, with Ne as his lead function. Or his N more introverted based? I mean if not, I'd still say he might be INTJ type 4w5, although I would need more information on him to be presicely sure.
 

CuriousFeeling

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He doesn't seem extroverted at all. He's more of the type to stay at home, or I'd find him studying in the library. I find his intuition is more introverted. He has a knack for predicting what the person will say next, and if he has a specific goal in mind, he stubbornly wants to see it through. He likes to have things organized, which seems more of a J trait. He tends to like music, art, or books that have an abstract theme, but make sense. He tends to live inside his mind.
 

Savage Idealist

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In that case, I would say he's probably an INTJ 4w5, with a well developed Fi. Although, INFJ 5w4, with a well developed Ti could be possible; would you say his feelings are more personal based ethics (Fi), or focused on group harmony among other people (Fe)? Same question reagarding Te and Ti; if he has Fe+Ti, then INFJ, if Te+Fi, INTJ.
 

CuriousFeeling

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I notice in groups, he tends to keep things fair and balanced. In school projects, he asks all the members of the group what they would like to have happen in the project, and if there's a disagreement, he has us vote on it. The thing that has most votes gets to pass go. When it comes to his feelings, it has to do with being his own person, remaining true to what he believes is morally correct. He doesn't look for conflict, but he isn't afraid to stand up for what he believes is factually true, and what he believes in. At times he can delve deeply into topics and pick things apart, but most times he talks about the steps he used to arrive at a given goal he has. He can be diplomatic and polite though. Perhaps he has a better developed Fe for an INTJ?
 

Savage Idealist

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INTJ with well developed Fe could be possible too, which would make him somehat bornerline on the T/F scale (it would also explain why this was the most difficult area to type him). But anyway he seems like he could be a very emtoionally mature INTJ, although have you ever asked him personally about MBTI and type?
 

CuriousFeeling

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I haven't asked him about MBTI and type, but it might be something interesting to him.

But I think it would be reasonable to conclude he is an INTJ 4w5 with developed Fe.
 

Savage Idealist

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Well until he learns of MBTI himself, I concur with the final decision of INTJ 4w5 with well developed Fe.
 

Nicodemus

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He doesn't look for conflict, but he isn't afraid to stand up for what he believes is factually true, and what he believes in. At times he can delve deeply into topics and pick things apart, but most times he talks about the steps he used to arrive at a given goal he has. He can be diplomatic and polite though. Perhaps he has a better developed Fe for an INTJ?
It is not necessary for an INTJ to be rude. Politeness is much more effective in dealing with people.
 

Craft

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1. Learn Judging Functions
2. Punch him
2. See Response
3. ????
4. Profit
 

CuriousFeeling

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It is not necessary for an INTJ to be rude. Politeness is much more effective in dealing with people.

True. I think my original definition of "politeness" came out of Fe traits of creating harmonious relationships between people. But you are correct that INTJs are polite too. Several of them I've interacted with in real life have been quite polite and professional while at work.

1. Learn Judging Functions
2. Punch him
2. See Response
3. ????
4. Profit

:laugh: Nothing like using a bit of experimentation to find out, albeit the hard way. :D
 

Forever_Jung

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That's tough, because INTJs are the most feeling NTs, and INFJs are the most thinking NFs. Whenever I am torn between typing someone as INTJ or INFJ because the T/F is close I go by gender. If the person is female and its close, I guess that she's an INTJ, and if it's a male that's close I guess INFJ. Men are usually going to look more T than they are, and women are going to look more F than they are. I make the assumption that society has pressured/influenced them to fall into more desirable roles for their respective genders.
 

Zarathustra

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One of my friends is an introvert and shy but at times can seem outgoing. He's got a knack for figuring out what I am going to say next, and tends to think/process information in an abstract yet organized fashion. Family is very important to him, and he's very loyal to his friends. When I first knew him, he was a bit moody and intense, but as time progressed, he's mellowed out. He doesn't show it, but deep down he is a romantic. He has a preference for getting things done quickly, and can figure out how a system works... involving both theories and people. Takes a while for him to warm to you, he seems initially cold, but when you get to know him, he is warm. Very bright person, definitely seems confident in what he knows about, although when it comes to talking about his abilities, he is humble about them, doesn't brag at all. He seems outwardly like an INTJ... but inwardly an INFJ. What type do you guys think he could be most like?

So I could be picking up on his tertiary Fi, which is why he seems warm. Might be a well-balanced INTJ. I do know that in times of stress, he gets temperamental and defensive towards what he believes is the right thing to do. Probably the most individualistic person I've ever came across. At times he can be quite blunt. Some of my friends that are aware of MBTI think he's an INFJ, but I get more of a INTJ vibe. Whenever I've said something that was factually incorrect, he would always correct me, which seems much more of an INTJ trait. Could be one of the rare INTJ type 4s.

Sounds like an INTJ with well-developed Fi, possibly well-developed Fe (or, more likely, something akin to the Te-mimicking-Fe variety), to me.

All of the bolded parts seem more INTJ than INFJ...

The bolded and underlined is a trait you will find amongst INTJs with well-developed Fi.

I wouldn't really even question this one... sounds pretty clear-cut INTJ to me...

I have to admit: part of me was wondering whether you were really asking about yourself...

By the end, though, I concluded that this likely was not the case...
 

CuriousFeeling

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It isn't about me, I can assure you. Te mimicking Fe... this concept has me intrigued. What are some ways that Te can mimic Fe?

To be honest, I wanted to verify if he really was an INTJ, because one of my female friends suspected he was an INFJ because he actually looks right into you whenever we speak with him, and seemed very good with children and animals. I had told her that he seemed more INTJ to me... but she didn't believe me.
 

Zarathustra

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It isn't about me, I can assure you.

Yeah, I read the thread from bottom up, and, well, knowing you're kind of an INxJ, I just started wondering whether that was the case... just seemed liked an interesting coincidence, and a possible case of "I have this friend who..."

By the time I got to the top, I realized it wasn't...

To be honest, I wanted to verify if he really was an INTJ, because one of my female friends suspected he was an INFJ because he actually looks right into you whenever we speak with him, and seemed very good with children and animals. I had told her that he seemed more INTJ to me... but she didn't believe me.

Hmmm... regarding looking right into: I have both a quality of not looking at people, and then looking straight into them... I don't necessarily make eye contact while my thoughts are still forming, but, once they're formed, I'll look you straight in the eye, in a way that is often perceived to be very piercing/knowing (of course, I'm a scorpio rising as well, so... :laugh:... if you believe in that stuff...)... I know many other INTJs (uumlau, highlander, kalach) have confessed to the former; I'm not as sure about the latter, but I'd suspect it's likely, at least to some degree, the case... not sure where your buddy might fit into that description... not sure exactly how INFJs might be the same, or differ, either (although, per your description, maybe they'd maintain eye contact??? I dunno, since the lack-of-eye-contact thing seemed to be an Ni-dom (Pi-dom?) issue, mostly...)...

As for kids and animals: I'm extremely good with animals. Kids are a little more hit-and-miss, but I surely wouldn't say I've been known to have problems with them. I'd say I'm generally pretty good with them, actually.
 
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Nicodemus

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I like to believe that I am good in reading people, too; less their souls, rather their way of thinking. I am good with cats and bad with children.
 

CuriousFeeling

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The way that INTJs read people are different from INFJs, I find. INTJs can get inside your head and concisely get to the point you're making... even predict what you're going to say/ask next. It's more idea/concept based. INFJs tend to want to know what someone's emotional experiences were, and attempt to predict the emotional state someone was in when something happened to them.

Yes, the guy in question, whenever he's listening to me, stares directly into my eyes. It can be a bit uneasy for me, and I end up talking to him like I'm staring up into my web of thoughts. He tends to have a low patience whenever I do that, and ends up saying what I was thinking in a much more concise way. He's very attentive whenever someone is speaking. But I notice his eye-contact is a bit more penetrating than mine is. My INFJ friends tend to have a softer gaze, a look of concern on their foreheads (they get a wrinkle in between their eyebrows).

I do notice that my INTJ friend, while he is very hands on with children, he tends to let them figure out what they want to do in their lives. He rarely imposes his own desires upon them. Me, on the other hand, I end up plotting out their life's plan and say "well, you'd be great doing this!" But, I notice he lightens up a bit with kids... his stare becomes less intense, and he's right there with them. It's like he wants to teach them.
 

Zarathustra

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The way that INTJs read people are different from INFJs, I find. INTJs can get inside your head and concisely get to the point you're making... even predict what you're going to say/ask next. It's more idea/concept based. INFJs tend to want to know what someone's emotional experiences were, and attempt to predict the emotional state someone was in when something happened to them.

Yes, the guy in question, whenever he's listening to me, stares directly into my eyes. It can be a bit uneasy for me, and I end up talking to him like I'm staring up into my web of thoughts. He tends to have a low patience whenever I do that, and ends up saying what I was thinking in a much more concise way. He's very attentive whenever someone is speaking. But I notice his eye-contact is a bit more penetrating than mine is. My INFJ friends tend to have a softer gaze, a look of concern on their foreheads (they get a wrinkle in between their eyebrows).

That's Te.

Ti frustrates us, cuz it can be so verbose.

We want concision, efficiency, and results. Not blathering.

I saw this great comparison on another typology site that put an INTJ's and an INFJ's answers to the same interview questions right next to eachother.

The INFJ's answers were 2-3x as long for almost every single question.

It was funny when the INFJ took note of that fact.

He/she felt embarrassed.

The INTJ just laughed.

:laugh:

skylights said:
I do notice that my INTJ friend, while he is very hands on with children, he tends to let them figure out what they want to do in their lives. He rarely imposes his own desires upon them. Me, on the other hand, I end up plotting out their life's plan and say "well, you'd be great doing this!"

Bolded is Fe.

Drives me insane.

So controlling...

Especially with my significant other's mother.

:doh:

skylights said:
But, I notice he lightens up a bit with kids... his stare becomes less intense, and he's right there with them. It's like he wants to teach them.

This is an interesting phenomenon.

I totally lighten up with children, and even moreso with animals.

I've started to question why, actually, and I think it might have to do with Ni-dom development.

As children, I think Ni-doms might face the choice of Fe vs Te.

For whatever reason, some of them might reject Fe, and the other reject Te.

Those who reject Fe, choose Te, and become INTJs.

Those who reject Te, choose Fe, and become INFJs.

I've started to wonder whether this might have to do with Jung's conception of the "shadow".

Anyway, rejection of Fe might have something to do with fear of opening oneself up to others, due to the potential for hurt.

With children, and even moreso with animals, the chance for this hurt is lessened, and, as such, we might open up, and start using our Fe.

I don't know; just a theory...

:shrug:
 
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