I am having difficulty typing myself as a sure INFJ. There are various facets of ENFP, ENTP, INFP and INTJ that I feel I exhibit and/or I have preferences for. I have tested a couple essays of mine on the writing style type indicator and come back decidedly INTP each time, but I don’t think INTP accurately personifies who or what I am.
-I have a profound interest in language and people. I was a foreign language/linguistics major in college, although I most definitely gravitated towards sociolinguistics and discourse analysis as opposed to the more hard science of phonetics and syntax, although I have a tendency for “grammar Nazism”. I HATE it when idioms are used incorrectly, and when people are imprecise with their word choice.
-I’ve studied abroad in South America and Japan. Both places I DEFINITELY noticed the chameleon trait; I very quickly pick up on other people’s communication styles and adopt them; internalizing what was socially correct, accepted, and quickly noticed what was considered obnoxious or ignorant. By the time I had finished studying abroad, I felt as if I had almost become half Argentine/Japanese, although I could still detach myself and do a very thorough analysis of the differences in social dynamics, thought process, and “faux pas” as they related to the different cultures. I was a good student most of my life, I just suck at math and chemistry.
-Growing up, I was very sensitive to how people perceived me. I still am. I can still remember in 6th grade when people made fun of my clothes and I quickly adapted to “fit in”. I have always liked melancholy, and sometimes, nostalgic music. I moved a lot (military brat) and found it exhausting trying to constantly fit into a new social group, but I would attempt it anyway because I felt it was the appropriate thing to do, and I needed validation.
-I usually don't initiate conversations with strangers, but I've had numerous bosses tell me I'm diplomatic.
-I can’t stand it when people are ignorant to others’ feelings, say things that don’t constructively contribute to the conversation, aren’t affirmative, say only that which applies strictly to themselves or are ignorant to the dynamics of the communication style. I also can't stand it when people are ignorant of the other person’s preferred nonverbal communication, turn-taking style or have a tendency to redirect the conversation according to their own whims.
-I want to project a positive (constructive) image. I am typically optimistic, but cynical of bureaucracy. I’m very hard on myself when I feel like I let people down. I prefer individual sports to team sports, not because I dislike human contact, but because not coming through when other people are depending on my performance is the ultimate downer. I get nervous when facing tests or other purely rational performance evaluation; I always preferred essay tests in school.
-I will conform to rules but I have to know WHY. If I don’t know why, or the reasoning isn’t solid I either won’t do it, will do it but with abundant criticism, or will do it while cutting as many corners as I can effectively identify.
-I think I can communicate well verbally, but am a better writer because I prefer precision in my expression rather than blurting out the first thing that comes to mind. Verbally, sometimes that means I will take a few extra seconds to search for the exact word to match my thought or feeling, which means I am a little more measured in what I say and so my communication style is much less aggressive than others, particularly in large groups.
-I like being admired, but I don’t like being on center-stage. I work out a lot, dress in complementing, earthy tones and like projecting the image of being independent, self-sufficient, thoughtful and observant. Although I know I am also sensitive, I don’t like people knowing that, maybe because I'm a guy and that could question my masculinity?
-I am in the military and I enjoy the camaraderie but not necessarily constant human engagement. I need alone time. I am more sensitive and disorganized than most of my contemporaries though I am good at spotting inconsistencies and reading people. I like engaging people, just not constantly. I organize myself only to the extent necessary to avoid being ostracized.
-I am married to a 100% ESFJ. Her personality type is wonderful because I feel like she complements me in ways that I come short, however it can also be taxing as our perceptions seem to be intensely different. I have a much easier time reading, understanding, and anticipating her than she does me.
Yes I realize this is more rambled musings and observations than anything else. I just see contradictions amongst all of the types and am hoping on some outside insight. This is one of those extremely vexing things and after a multitude of tests and reflections I'm asking for some help!
Can anybody type me????