Help a confused ISFJ

[strychnine]

Hello, I just joined up because I'm very interested in personality theory/ typology, yet still confused about my own type. I've taken the MBTI with my college's career counseling but I haven't yet seen the results. I also took Keirsey's second temperament sorter out of his book, Please Understand Me II. On that test, scored Ixxx -- strong I, and the rest were pretty much on the border. I think I had about 60% N. I've taken other tests online, but I can't find a cognitive process one. On the regular 4-letter tests, I've scored ISFJ mostly. But again, all the dimensions except Introversion were close.

So, I assumed I was an ISFJ, but then I read through the type's various descriptions, including Keirsey's (one of the few that doesn't treat the ISFJ as a dumb doormat character). Then I realized some of the more fundamental attributes of the type don't fit me well at all. For example, I don't have much of a desire for safety and security. I have very little sense of loyalty or duty, and I don't feel responsible to/for anyone. (And I HATE children, I intend to get sterilized asap and never have them.) I don't really think I have any obligations at all, I just follow my interests, which change but still remain constant. Well, that's confusing. I meant they change within one larger field, and the field is what remains constant. The one thing I can't usually do well is express things sequentially. I have very little sense of morality. I don't see things as "right" and "wrong", it is all contextual/situational for me.

I am also very unreliable. I don't expect people to be there for me, but I don't want to have to be there for other people. When others get emotional, I get very uncomfortable because I've realized that crying people don't want my potential solutions, they want sympathy I can't provide. I can't even tell what I'm feeling most of the time. I am not sarcastic normally but when angry or under pressure, I can really piss people off with my sarcasm.

Also, I don't believe that something is better than a new idea just because it worked last time. I don't necessarily respect something more just because it was done before. A track record of excellence alone does not, to me, guarantee excellence in the future. And also, I don't necessarily want guarantees, as I trust my ability to find a way out if something goes wrong, WHEN it goes wrong. I don't need certainty, and I've accepted that even my best ideas cannot be airtight anyway. Something will crash and burn at some point, and the best I can do is rebuild and correct my course along the way. I am fine with that. I think we either control everything or nothing anyway, because the things we don't control can just conspire against us in a manner that derails our plan -- so we essentially have no absolute control. I am also fine with that. (So I don't sound very J, do I?)

One part of the ISFJ description that fits me perfectly is the tendency to be seen as stiff and cold. However, I would not say that these perceptions are completely wrong. I don't think I am "warm hearted" inside. I am shy, though, and I don't like talking to people and socializing. Most people irritate me with their prattling about what they did last weekend, what they saw on TV, how so-and-so did x, y, and z. I can't keep up with that type of conversation and I don't care for it.

Actually there's another part about our frugality and the whole "good with money" thing. That's very true of me. I'm not good with money for the sake of it, though, I just tend to not desire things that cost money. I am just naturally cheap, haha. It's not because I am worried about the future. I guess this is similar to the duty part -- I don't think it's my duty to save money, and I don't feel obligated to do so, I just naturally end up being that way, which is similar to following an interest (not literally).

Anyway, I realize this is long, but I'm really confused about my type, as you can see. Please help me! Thanks in advance for your time.

 

[Synarch]

ISTJ.

Full of win, by the way!

 

[miss fortune]

he he... I was thinking that you sounded kind of like my ISTJ (who doesn't feel a duty to society, but to himself and tends to avoid children as if they were cockroaches)

here is the cognitive processes test

 

[Giggly]

Don't make too much of the SJ descriptions. They're the worst and most inaccurate of all the temperament descriptions.

Since we've lost our other resident cranky and critical ISFJ, JTG1984, I hope you stick around.

 

[strychnine]

Thanks guys for the quick responses. (and for the link) Here are my results:

Cognitive Process Level of Development (Preference, Skill and Frequency of Use)
extraverted Sensing (Se) ********************** (22.4)
limited use
introverted Sensing (Si) *************** (16)
unused
extraverted Intuiting (Ne) ************************************************ (48.5)
excellent use
introverted Intuiting (Ni) ******************************* (31.3)
good use
extraverted Thinking (Te) ******************************** (32.4)
good use
introverted Thinking (Ti) ********************************************** (46.8)
excellent use
extraverted Feeling (Fe) ************** (14.9)
unused
introverted Feeling (Fi) *************************** (27.1)
average use


Am I right thinking that ISxJs have Si as their dominant? Now I'm really confused haha

 

[Giggly]

My my. You're really an ENTP. LOL!

 

[Thalassa]

Complete lack of Si. I noticed this in your intial post, even before I looked at your functions test, so I don't know why these people are saying ISTJ.

You are not an SJ.

Also, "contextual morality" indicates you're probably either some kind of FP or T type.

 

[strychnine]

^ They probably skimmed the post before replying. I just looked at the time stamps and I think would need more than one minute to read what I wrote there haha. Anyway, thanks for the response. I guess I could be ISFP? Though the process test doesn't agree with that either.


As for the bad SJ descriptions, I think the people writing them have some kind of beef with SJs. Seriously, they make it sound like SJ = dumb sheep and from the SJs I know (even if I'm not one) that's far from true.

 

[miss fortune]

well, yeah! everyone knows that geniuses are only Ns and that all SJs are either sheep or jackbooted fascists, while all SPs are either stoned or partying like Britney

 

[Giggly]

As for the bad SJ descriptions, I think the people writing them have some kind of beef with SJs. Seriously, they make it sound like SJ = dumb sheep and from the SJs I know (even if I'm not one) that's far from true.

The descriptions really are crap. Seriously. But people do need another group to throw their poo at like monkeys. It's cathartic for them or something.

 

[strychnine]

The descriptions really are crap. Seriously. But people do need another group to throw their poo at like monkeys. It's cathartic for them or something.

Like racism. Though that is minority bashing, mostly. This I would suggest is slightly different because SJs are known (incorrectly or not) as the ones who lay down the rules and run the world. And some people who don't quite fit in the SJs' world are bitter about it, apparently. I don't like much of Keirsey's overall idea but on the count of fair descriptions, he is not as biased as others I've seen. I think he truly believes that it's a damn good thing we aren't all the same . I agree with that.


Ok. So if the descriptions are not very good how can I know which type I am? I know too much about the 4 axes by now to honestly take a test. I can get whatever result I want. But I think I am pretty solid on P now as well. IxxP

 

[Giggly]

Like racism. Though that is minority bashing, mostly. This I would suggest is slightly different because SJs are known (incorrectly or not) as the ones who lay down the rules and run the world. And some people who don't quite fit in the SJs' world are bitter about it, apparently. I don't like much of Keirsey's overall idea but on the count of fair descriptions, he is not as biased as others I've seen. I think he truly believes that it's a damn good thing we aren't all the same . I agree with that.


Ok. So if the descriptions are not very good how can I know which type I am? I know too much about the 4 axes by now to honestly take a test. I can get whatever result I want. But I think I am pretty solid on P now as well. IxxP

Why have a type? It's so confining.

 

[Xenon]

You really don't sound anything like an ISFJ at all. I would guess IxTP at this point. But all I can say for sure is you aren't ISFJ.

 

[Saslou]

Why have a type? It's so confining.

+1

 

[strychnine]

Why have a type? It's so confining.

I don't think it is, I'm still gonna be the same person I am now regardless of what my type ends up being. It's just interesting to me, how billions of people can actually be distilled down to 16 types, but of course there is variation among members of the same type. It's only confining if I choose a type and try to act like it.

You really don't sound anything like an ISFJ at all. I would guess IxTP at this point. But all I can say for sure is you aren't ISFJ.

Thanks for the input. I can believe IxTP. Now I've gotta figure out N/S.

Thanks again everyone, I appreciate the help.

 

[Thalassa]

I don't think it is, I'm still gonna be the same person I am now regardless of what my type ends up being. It's just interesting to me, how billions of people can actually be distilled down to 16 types, but of course there is variation among members of the same type. It's only confining if I choose a type and try to act like it.


Thanks for the input. I can believe IxTP. Now I've gotta figure out N/S.

Thanks again everyone, I appreciate the help.

I don't think it's all that bizarre that you got a four letter result of ISFJ, though, because I used to get INFJ all of the time before I understood MBTI and function theory, and it turns out I'm much more of an eXFP, leaning toward ENFP.

 

[Giggly]

I don't think it is, I'm still gonna be the same person I am now regardless of what my type ends up being. It's just interesting to me, how billions of people can actually be distilled down to 16 types, but of course there is variation among members of the same type. It's only confining if I choose a type and try to act like it.

Speaking from someone who doesn't feel arrested to personality traits (i.e. I think they can always change if you want it) it seems confining to me. I just keep my type here cos people will have a heart attack if I changed.

 

[onceuponatime]

ISFJs are always confused, so my guess is that you probably are one.

 

[strychnine]

I don't think it's all that bizarre that you got a four letter result of ISFJ, though, because I used to get INFJ all of the time before I understood MBTI and function theory, and it turns out I'm much more of an eXFP, leaning toward ENFP.

I think it's good to trust our understanding more than the test. I think people commonly mistype themselves based on a test result. So I shouldn't give the original result much weight now, I suppose.


----
I relate to so much of this: Extraverted Intuition

As for Se, I completely lack coordination. I do these types of tasks very badly:

p. 146: "It happens when we're kneading bread and the pressure of our hands changes with the texture of the dough. It happens when we're moving a ball downcourt for a chance at the hoop. It happens when we're driving, alert to a whole field of sights and sounds. It happens when we're playing in a band. It happens when we're knitting a sweater. Every time our actions are changing immediately and directly in concert with our surface perceptions, we're drawing on Extraverted Sensation."

Not sure if that means my Se is too weak to be auxiliary.

According to this (http://www.typologycentral.com/foru...27-quick-guide-double-checking-your-type.html) thread, I'm definitely informing. Quite uncomfortable telling people to do things.

I can also relate to the Ti/Ne here. But also to this one, though it's ISTP. I just don't know to what degree I prefer the abstract over the concrete. I am pretty sure that I do, but I still don't know. I could just be biased.

 

[strychnine]

Any insights on the following? Thanks.

INTP is Ti Ne Si Fe and ISFJ is Si Fe Ti Ne. Could these types in some way mirror each other, where one type behaving in a manner that is unnatural to them could look more like the other?

How good would my Ne need to be to be auxiliary?

Also, I really can't get along with ESFJs. Can't stand them. I am thinking that might NOT be because I am INTP, but rather because I am ISFJ and the ESFJs possess things I dislike about myself, so I dislike them without realizing they are similar to me.