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Thread: Friend's type

  1. #1
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    Default Friend's type

    I'm having some conflict with a long-time friend and thought it might help to figure out her type. She told me a long time ago that she did an online test and came out EXXP. I can't remember the middle-two.

    Her traits:

    Extremely outgoing
    So talkative that nobody can get a word in
    Is not a good listener (just talks)
    is generally fun to be around and laughs a lot
    Makes new friends easily
    Is unsheduled
    semi-disorganized
    takes life one day at a time
    quits jobs without having another one lined up
    has a Masters degree in art history
    is currently an artist/photographer/creativity coach (is very good at photography, but her paintings are awful - but I guess that's subjective)
    has increasingly become 'new agey' over the years (which is a source of tension between us)
    is HUGELY into The Secret (Law of Attraction, etc) and similar programs and pushes it on everyone in her life
    is not intellectual
    only sees people/issues/feelings from her own perspective - inability to empathize with others - for example, when I told her that my husband might lose his job she just said 'well, I didn't have a job once either and I made it just fine'

    Any thoughts?

  2. #2
    Occasional Member Evan's Avatar
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    i'd guess ESTP.

    it's possible she's ESFP also -- Fi isn't necessarily empathetic, especially when paired with Se.

  3. #3
    The Destroyer Colors's Avatar
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    Extremely outgoing
    So talkative that nobody can get a word in
    Is not a good listener (just talks)
    is generally fun to be around and laughs a lot
    Makes new friends easily
    Is unsheduled
    semi-disorganized
    takes life one day at a time
    quits jobs without having another one lined up
    Defintely sounds like an ExxP.

    has a Masters degree in art history [dedicated, perhaps?]
    is currently an artist/photographer/creativity coach (is very good at photography, but her paintings are awful - but I guess that's subjective)
    has increasingly become 'new agey' over the years (which is a source of tension between us) [Not sure this tells anything]
    is HUGELY into The Secret (Law of Attraction, etc) and similar programs and pushes it on everyone in her life [Don't know much about this, but sounds sort of NF, or maybe just F in general]
    is not intellectual [not NT?]
    only sees people/issues/feelings from her own perspective - inability to empathize with others - for example, when I told her that my husband might lose his job she just said 'well, I didn't have a job once either and I made it just fine'
    My guess is ESFP, but ENFP is probably a good guess too.

  4. #4
    Occasional Member Evan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Colors View Post
    Defintely sounds like an ExxP.



    My guess is ESFP, but ENFP is probably a good guess too.
    ENFPs tend to be intellectual from my experience. I mean, Ne is very intellectual.

  5. #5
    insert random title here Randomnity's Avatar
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    The new agey stuff sounds ENFx, but the rest seems ESFP. Maybe ESTP but I don't really get that vibe from what you said. Not really enough information to be sure, though.

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    Interesting! I read up on the types at SimpleMinds and for both ESFP and ESTP it has painter, artist as 'non-favored careers.' I wonder if that is relevant? I will read up on ENFP also.

    I guess I'm not sure if she's intellectual - I doubt it because I've known her for 15 years and she mostly talks about: her painting, her husband, her kids, her mother, her travels, her hobbies etc. But what's so obvious is how 'sucked into' these new age philosophies she gets. She also makes a big deal of 'purposely' being 'out-there' and 'artsy.' But at times it seems fake or artificial. She's pushing 40 and got a pink streak in her hair, her navel pierced (nothing wrong with any of these things but in she made a big deal of it 'oh, look how artsy I am!)

    I would find it hard to believe that we might share 3/4 letters since I've always felt that ours is a bit of 'opposites attract' kind of relationship. I value peaceful relationships, security, and general harmony and she's always in the center of some drama, and constantly has new major projects and so forth. Could that simply be the J versus P difference?

    I also have to mention that when we have known each other since childhood but lost touch during out teen years because she was mousey and geeky (yet very talkative!) and I was popular and really into the HS social scene. I guess what I'm saying is all this 'artistic'/new agey stuff developed later in life.

    Edit - just read up on ENFP at TypeLogic and it sounds a lot like her! Is she purposely trying to act more S-like than she really is I wonder?

  7. #7
    Occasional Member Evan's Avatar
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    almost definitely ESFP. btw, ESFP and ESFJ are very different (yes, it is simply the J vs. P difference).

  8. #8
    Senior Member lazyhappy's Avatar
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    ENFP

    she seems like a N
    for S's are more practical and they are more "I need to get this done" and live in reality and all that stuff... whenever i talk to a "s" they always talk about a test they are worried about or school....

    the enfp i met arn't the brightest and they don't listen to reason!

    edit- no offence enfps

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    I think this is a person that would type herself as ENFP, but I think a cognitive functions test might show she is actually ESFP. As far as Fi goes, in some cases it's not empathetic at all, and I also think it can lead to interest in New Age stuff. You say you find it hard to believe you could have three letters in common. Perhaps it has to do with you having mistyped yourself? I was looking at your type thread again, and your cognitive functions test indicates you are an ST. Which ST type I cannot really tell with any degree of certainty though.

  10. #10
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    You could be right Splittet - I did score as a T on the test you mention. But I score as an F on many others and the decriptions of ESFJ are much more like me than ESTJ - but I could DEFINATELY be wrong. The test that I used more recently tested actual type and preferred type and it said that my actual type was F but I preferred T which I found interesting. But you are right - I could be wrong about myself. I score so close to the middle on I/E and F/T and get differing results on every test I take.

    Anyhow, back to my friend - yeah she could be an S who wants to be an N! I also think that our conflict could entirely be because of the P/J difference. She doesn't value or respect my J'ness and thinks that everyone should be P's. I was told a couple of days ago that my need for a steady income was due to 'unresolved fears.' Hmm...no....I just want to pay my bills.

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