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Thread: ESFP vs ENFP

  1. #1
    Senior Member mwv6r's Avatar
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    Default ESFP vs ENFP

    So I had always assumed my cousin was an ESFP - she's a fun-loving, party-girl type, was in a sorority in college, business major, really into fashion, always looks really stylish and put-together, etc. I got to know her on a deeper level after spending time with her after a recent family event, and now I'm confused over whether she may actually be an ENFP.

    Getting to know her, she is far more kooky/crazy/over-the-top (in a good way) than I'd realized before, saying off-the-wall things, having a lot of intensity in conversation, and bubbling over with energy and enthusiasm. For example, she declared out of the blue that she was thinking of getting online certification to be able to marry people in non-secular wedding ceremonies. I was like oh my god I love that you are so much weirder than I realized. (And I often experience that kindred-spirit-ish feeling around my kooky intuitive friends.)

    Does that sound like an ENFP? Then again, we had a conversation about how I'm an atheist and she was very curious and had a lot of questions for me but I was struck that the possibility of god not existing seemed not to have occurred to her before. I would've thought NFs with their search for meaning-of-life and meaning-of-self would have grappled with that sooner. And her retail job doesn't seem super NF-y to me.

    Any thoughts on whether she's N vs S? She's my cuz and I love her either way of course but I'm curious.

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    failure to thrive AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    My new friend (of 2 years now) is an esfp--studied personality typing and taken the test several times. I used to think she was an enfp too, and her first test results were enfp, but tests seem to default to N for some reason.

    The clincher for me was that she is soooo Se! She notices everything and remembers things I say very easily. If she were enfp, her primary function would be Ne, which it's not. Se trumps all in her. And she's not really intuitive. She has the same traits as your friend actually. We don't talk deep, but we are kindred spirits in our weirdness and way we tackle things we take an interest in.
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    Your cousin sounds VERY ESFP. Just because she has an occasional weird idea (she does have inferior Ni, after all...) that doesn't make her an Ne dom.

    Edit: my mom is an ESFP and she can be VERY weird. An ESFPs intensity can come from the fact they also have auxillary Fi like an ENFP. But my mom is definitely an ESFP - it's not so much about being "weird" but like Aphrodite said, the definite preference for Se.

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    Senior Member Kristiana's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mwv6r View Post
    So I had always assumed my cousin was an ESFP - she's a fun-loving, party-girl type, was in a sorority in college, business major, really into fashion, always looks really stylish and put-together, etc. I got to know her on a deeper level after spending time with her after a recent family event, and now I'm confused over whether she may actually be an ENFP.
    These things don't imply S.

    Most E types I know, whether S or N, like to party and have fun.

    I have an INTJ friend who has an MBA. Another INTJ, the father of some other friends, has his own business.

    Being into fashion and style doesn't make you S - it just means that either you are very into aesthetics, and/or something in your environment or upbringing caused you to care strongly about how you look (if you're female, this is not too unusual with our culture).

    As far as the questions about atheism, perhaps she lives in an area where there aren't many atheists.
    j'adore les chats

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    Senior Member Space_Oddity's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kristiana View Post
    Being into fashion and style doesn't make you S - it just means that either you are very into aesthetics, and/or something in your environment or upbringing caused you to care strongly about how you look (if you're female, this is not too unusual with our culture).
    Well, but there is 'style' and 'style'. As far as I've observed, N types are way more into self-expression and they want to look somewhat original and imaginative. The S types, on the contrary, really care about being fashionable and stylish because of the clothes/look itself. They rather want to be stylish in the traditional sense - for Si types, it usually means conservative (or "traditionally" alternative), for Se types, it's just highly fashionable (while they are able to handle perfectly details that N types rarely notice). Of course, it possibly differs from country to country, but so far I've noticed very few exceptions from this rule.

    As for the OP, I really don't see anything that would exclude the ESFP. They can be also very crazy, bubbly, enthusiastic and intellectually curious. These things alone do not imply N - you have to look for the Se+Ni / Ne+Si difference.

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    failure to thrive AphroditeGoneAwry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Space_Oddity View Post
    Well, but there is 'style' and 'style'. As far as I've observed, N types are way more into self-expression and they want to look somewhat original and imaginative. The S types, on the contrary, really care about being fashionable and stylish because of the clothes/look itself. They rather want to be stylish in the traditional sense - for Si types, it usually means conservative (or "traditionally" alternative), for Se types, it's just highly fashionable (while they are able to handle perfectly details that N types rarely notice). Of course, it possibly differs from country to country, but so far I've noticed very few exceptions from this rule.

    As for the OP, I really don't see anything that would exclude the ESFP. They can be also very crazy, bubbly, enthusiastic and intellectually curious. These things alone do not imply N - you have to look for the Se+Ni / Ne+Si difference.
    Wow. You are good. I think you are on to something, perhaps. My ESFP friend is stylish in more of a brand name way; the jeans, the boots, the p coat, etc. she doesn't necessarily want to stand out. She is trendy. My daughter is Si dom and she is highly conservative dresser; only wears black, navy blue, white, or grey and doesn't like to stand out at all; wears stylish things, but doesn't care about name brands. I am Ni and I like to express myself in very small ways--stand out but not very much. If I wear something too outlandish, or wear my hair in a different way, I can only do so for a couple hours, before reverting to a more nondescript way. Perhaps Ne's are more showy?

    Ditto on the bolded as well.
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    Do not resist an evil person, but to him who strikes you on the one cheek, offer also the other. ~Matthew 5:39

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    I agree with ESFP. And my ESFP cousin is very fashionable (I would be too if I weren't poor ). He always looks nice, and knows it. He's very friendly and easy to talk to. He's also very intellectually curious, but you wouldn't expect that out of him at all. Over Christmas when we were at our grandma's I introduced him to the enneagram and he was very interested in learning more (he's a 3w4 so/sx). He said it was strange how something could describe him so well. He read most of my book in a night.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

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    Senior Member King sns's Avatar
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    Very very similar to my best friend,
    strong esfp.
    (More N than I am. But I can never go by that. )

    SP's can also have a wacky, out of the box thinking style
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    06/13 10:51:57 shortnsweet: (cries)
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  9. #9
    Nickle Iron Silicone Charmed Justice's Avatar
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    From what I've read, ENFPs are much more interested in seeking a consensus in decision making, and ESFPs tend to be more autonomous.

    The biggest difference that I've noticed between my ESFP friends and I is that I definitely speak more in abstractions than they do. I also worry more about the future, and I'm much more inhibited in my actions because I'm concerned about the "what ifs". I don't trust my impulses, and they absolutely do. My ESFP friends also don't have the same need to dig into the whys of everything. They are usually satisfied with the the simpliest answer; whereas, my preference is to immerse myself in the complex.

    As far as fashion, I'm not sure I've noticed much of a difference in our style, but more of a difference in our motivation regarding our style. We all like nice clothes and see them more like art. I think I care a little bit more about comfort, and it seems that I think and care a lot more about how my clothes represent my emotional state. I also tend to leave something out from an otherwise well put together outfit, mainly cause I forgot or something.

    Also, I worked in sales for a very long time, and I noticed that my ESFP friends are great at selling tangibles(cellphones, nursing equipment, etc...). On the other hand, I always prefered to sell intangibles(ideas, excitement, the possibility of a good time, etc...). They sold the steak, and I sold the sizzle.
    There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made, and which, in its original state, permeates, penetrates, and fills the interspaces of the universe.

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