help with my MBTI type

[psyche]

Hello. I'm new here, but not new to typology. I'm very familiar with the Enneagram and know my type well. I'm somewhat familiar with the MBTI but, after years of thinking of myself as ENFP I've come to believe I'm either ENFJ or XNFX. I'd love some help sorting this out.

I'll explain my conundrum. First, I vs E. Most people would describe me as extraverted, and I think I am but just slightly. My job entails leading groups and public speaking. I'm told I come across as warm, engaging, and dynamic, even with strangers. However, these qualities are much more pronounced when I'm leading a group or relating one-on-one. Outside of leading groups and the occasional family event, I never spend time in groups. I'm uncomfortable and easily overstimulated. I don't even go out with more than one friend at a time. I don't need tons of time alone (though I do spend hours alone working) but I also don't spend much time socializing with other people except to talk with my close friends on the phone, usually daily, or to be with my SO.

Next, J vs P. In my social life, I'm very much P (though I'm very punctual) but outside of my social life I'm very much J. I hate making plans with people to socialize because I feel trapped and only do so if I know I really want to see that person. I don't even like making a firm time to talk on the phone. But in every area except for socializing, I have and like structure. I work independently but still with structure. I'm all about to-do lists, having an organized home and car, and am very goal-oriented.

I may be explaining the temperaments incorrectly; I apologize if that's the case. MB isn't my forte.

Any feedback would be much appreciated. My career is shifting and I've been confronted with an unexpected resistance to extraverting, so I'd like to understand where this is coming from.

Thanks!

 

[Wonkavision]

Hello. I'm new here, but not new to typology. I'm very familiar with the Enneagram and know my type well. I'm somewhat familiar with the MBTI but, after years of thinking of myself as ENFP I've come to believe I'm either ENFJ or XNFX. I'd love some help sorting this out.

I'll explain my conundrum. First, I vs E. Most people would describe me as extraverted, and I think I am but just slightly. My job entails leading groups and public speaking. I'm told I come across as warm, engaging, and dynamic, even with strangers. However, these qualities are much more pronounced when I'm leading a group or relating one-on-one. Outside of leading groups and the occasional family event, I never spend time in groups. I'm uncomfortable and easily overstimulated. I don't even go out with more than one friend at a time. I don't need tons of time alone (though I do spend hours alone working) but I also don't spend much time socializing with other people except to talk with my close friends on the phone, usually daily, or to be with my SO.

Next, J vs P. In my social life, I'm very much P (though I'm very punctual) but outside of my social life I'm very much J. I hate making plans with people to socialize because I feel trapped and only do so if I know I really want to see that person. I don't even like making a firm time to talk on the phone. But in every area except for socializing, I have and like structure. I work independently but still with structure. I'm all about to-do lists, having an organized home and car, and am very goal-oriented.

I may be explaining the temperaments incorrectly; I apologize if that's the case. MB isn't my forte.

Any feedback would be much appreciated. My career is shifting and I've been confronted with an unexpected resistance to extraverting, so I'd like to understand where this is coming from.

Thanks!

I'm not saying you are definitely ENFP, but I'm an ENFP and I relate to almost every word of this.

I've only recently begun to understand the power of to-do lists, and I'm not having much success with them yet, but I know that many ENFPs find them very helpful---even crucial--for balancing their generally unstructured lifestyle.

 

[psyche]

Hmmmm....interesting, Wonkavision (love the name, btw).

But -- you're 7w8 Enneagram, and I'm 4w3. I know a handful of 7w8s and they're much, much more extraverted and perceiving than I am. I find it interesting that you feel easily overstimulated in groups (for me, it's when I'm around any more than one person at a time). I've never seen this before in a 7w8.

 

[Wonkavision]

Hmmmm....interesting, Wonkavision (love the name, btw).

But -- you're 7w8 Enneagram, and I'm 4w3. I know a handful of 7w8s and they're much, much more extraverted and perceiving than I am. I find it interesting that you feel easily overstimulated in groups (for me, it's when I'm around any more than one person at a time). I've never seen this before in a 7w8.

Yeah, I said I relate to almost everything you posted.

The to-do lists and the overstimulation were the two things I didn't relate to as much.

Sorry, I forgot to mention the overstimulation.

I generally enjoy groups, but in a sense, I do get overstimulated if there's too much conflict or debate though.

 

[Bougal]

I'd say eNFj.

 

[Lady_X]

i wish there was more discussion about enneagram here...i don't feel like i have that much info on it.

to do lists make me mad...i feel pressured and even less inspired to do them once they're on a list...totally ridiculous...i realize.

but yeah...i don't always feeel like extraverting...like when i'm tired....it's hard if your job demands it...like mine kinda does.

sounds like you could be an enfp though...since the structure is just at work really.

 

[onemoretime]

ENFJ. You like building up social groups (Fe) and maintain openness to possibilities (Ni).

 

[psyche]

ENFJ. You like building up social groups (Fe) and maintain openness to possibilities (Ni).

Hi,

Thanks (and thanks to others) for replying.

It's true that I enjoy facilitating groups, but not building them up. Like, I'd never want to be a team leader at an organization. I don't even work in an organization formally, so I don't have to be part of the group. Does that make a difference to your answer?

 

[Wonkavision]

Here we go.....

A quote from "Personality Type:An Owner's Manual", by Lenore Thompson:

Extraverted Perceivers use Extraverted Sensation or Extraverted Intuition most of the time, which moves them to react immediately to external stimulation............

.....Accordingly, these types can find it difficult to defend themselves against overstimulation or depletion. They adapt to reality by participating fully in whatever turns up, and they'll invest as much time, energy, and attention as they have--until it runs out.......

Apparently, ENFPs can be easily overstimulated.

So, even if you find yourself being easily overstimulated, you may still be an ENFP.

 

[psyche]

Here we go.....

A quote from "Personality Type:An Owner's Manual", by Lenore Thompson:



Apparently, ENFPs can be easily overstimulated.

So, even if you find yourself being easily overstimulated, you may still be an ENFP.

Well, I don't participate fully in whatever turns up, but I didn't realize that ENFPs could get overstimulated easily. Now I'm totally confused! My mother is a 7w8 and she's got such a high tolerance for group interactions and activities, it's amazing. She thrives on them. Maybe I'm comparing myself to her too much; I don't know. Anyway, thanks. This is actually very interesting.

 

[BlackCat]

I'd say you're definitely an E. I can just tell from the vibe you put off, you aren't an INF that's for sure.

 

[psyche]

I'd say you're definitely an E. I can just tell from the vibe you put off, you aren't an INF that's for sure.

Is it really possible to be so certain from just reading a few short posts?

 

[MellowMarcello]

Hello my bipedalled friend...

What stacking of 4w3 are you?...so/sx?

Where do you think the enneagram literature most misses the mark when it comes to 4w3s?

 

[MellowMarcello]

Yeah, I said I relate to almost everything you posted.

The to-do lists and the overstimulation were the two things I didn't relate to as much.

Sorry, I forgot to mention the overstimulation.

I generally enjoy groups, but in a sense, I do get overstimulated if there's too much conflict or debate though.

Hello my bipedalled friend..maybe you are a 9w8 instead of a 7w8?

The last thing a double-aggressive feels is being overstimulated due to conflict.

 

[MellowMarcello]

Is it really possible to be so certain from just reading a few short posts?

Okay now this gets my attention.

if I hadn't seen you self-type as a 4w3 I would have said that sounded double-head typish...5w6/6w5.

 

[Wonkavision]

Hello my bipedalled friend..maybe you are a 9w8 instead of a 7w8?

The last thing a double-aggressive feels is being overstimulated due to conflict.

I have qualities of many different types, but fundamentally, I'm a 7w8.

I think the passage I quoted from Lenore Thompson explains it well enough.

 

[MellowMarcello]

Extraverted Perceivers use Extraverted Sensation or Extraverted Intuition most of the time, which moves them to react immediately to external stimulation............

.....Accordingly, these types can find it difficult to defend themselves against overstimulation or depletion. They adapt to reality by participating fully in whatever turns up, and they'll invest as much time, energy, and attention as they have--until it runs out.......

overstimulated due to conflict or debate is different from going pedal to the metal and burning yourself out.

 

[BlackCat]

Is it really possible to be so certain from just reading a few short posts?

Well, for me yes. You don't seem very INFP or INFJ from your posts. Sorry for the delayed response by the way.

Here are the two best profiles I've seen for ENFP and ENFJ. The INFP one fits like a glove for me, and I can't relate to most profiles at all out there. I think that this is because this one is purely from interviews with the types, and no stereotypes are projected onto them.

ENFP- ENFP
ENFJ- ENFJ

ENFPs are "Get things going". ENFJs are "In charge". This should help you some more-

In-Charge
Get-Things-Going

 

[NewEra]

INFJ. I don't see any signs of extroversion.

 

[Wonkavision]

overstimulated due to conflict or debate is different from going pedal to the metal and burning yourself out.

Right.

What Thompson is talking about there is putting the pedal to the metal and burning yourself out.

That is correct.

She's not talking about being overstimulated by conflict or debate---that was my original attempt to explain how I can get overstimulated.

After I posted that, I sought out my typology books for a better explanation.

I think hers is great, that's why I quoted it.