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  1. #1

    Default help with my MBTI type

    Hello. I'm new here, but not new to typology. I'm very familiar with the Enneagram and know my type well. I'm somewhat familiar with the MBTI but, after years of thinking of myself as ENFP I've come to believe I'm either ENFJ or XNFX. I'd love some help sorting this out.

    I'll explain my conundrum. First, I vs E. Most people would describe me as extraverted, and I think I am but just slightly. My job entails leading groups and public speaking. I'm told I come across as warm, engaging, and dynamic, even with strangers. However, these qualities are much more pronounced when I'm leading a group or relating one-on-one. Outside of leading groups and the occasional family event, I never spend time in groups. I'm uncomfortable and easily overstimulated. I don't even go out with more than one friend at a time. I don't need tons of time alone (though I do spend hours alone working) but I also don't spend much time socializing with other people except to talk with my close friends on the phone, usually daily, or to be with my SO.

    Next, J vs P. In my social life, I'm very much P (though I'm very punctual) but outside of my social life I'm very much J. I hate making plans with people to socialize because I feel trapped and only do so if I know I really want to see that person. I don't even like making a firm time to talk on the phone. But in every area except for socializing, I have and like structure. I work independently but still with structure. I'm all about to-do lists, having an organized home and car, and am very goal-oriented.

    I may be explaining the temperaments incorrectly; I apologize if that's the case. MB isn't my forte.

    Any feedback would be much appreciated. My career is shifting and I've been confronted with an unexpected resistance to extraverting, so I'd like to understand where this is coming from.

    Thanks!

  2. #2
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by psyche View Post
    Hello. I'm new here, but not new to typology. I'm very familiar with the Enneagram and know my type well. I'm somewhat familiar with the MBTI but, after years of thinking of myself as ENFP I've come to believe I'm either ENFJ or XNFX. I'd love some help sorting this out.

    I'll explain my conundrum. First, I vs E. Most people would describe me as extraverted, and I think I am but just slightly. My job entails leading groups and public speaking. I'm told I come across as warm, engaging, and dynamic, even with strangers. However, these qualities are much more pronounced when I'm leading a group or relating one-on-one. Outside of leading groups and the occasional family event, I never spend time in groups. I'm uncomfortable and easily overstimulated. I don't even go out with more than one friend at a time. I don't need tons of time alone (though I do spend hours alone working) but I also don't spend much time socializing with other people except to talk with my close friends on the phone, usually daily, or to be with my SO.

    Next, J vs P. In my social life, I'm very much P (though I'm very punctual) but outside of my social life I'm very much J. I hate making plans with people to socialize because I feel trapped and only do so if I know I really want to see that person. I don't even like making a firm time to talk on the phone. But in every area except for socializing, I have and like structure. I work independently but still with structure. I'm all about to-do lists, having an organized home and car, and am very goal-oriented.

    I may be explaining the temperaments incorrectly; I apologize if that's the case. MB isn't my forte.

    Any feedback would be much appreciated. My career is shifting and I've been confronted with an unexpected resistance to extraverting, so I'd like to understand where this is coming from.

    Thanks!
    I'm not saying you are definitely ENFP, but I'm an ENFP and I relate to almost every word of this.

    I've only recently begun to understand the power of to-do lists, and I'm not having much success with them yet, but I know that many ENFPs find them very helpful---even crucial--for balancing their generally unstructured lifestyle.
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  3. #3

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    Hmmmm....interesting, Wonkavision (love the name, btw).

    But -- you're 7w8 Enneagram, and I'm 4w3. I know a handful of 7w8s and they're much, much more extraverted and perceiving than I am. I find it interesting that you feel easily overstimulated in groups (for me, it's when I'm around any more than one person at a time). I've never seen this before in a 7w8.

  4. #4
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by psyche View Post
    Hmmmm....interesting, Wonkavision (love the name, btw).

    But -- you're 7w8 Enneagram, and I'm 4w3. I know a handful of 7w8s and they're much, much more extraverted and perceiving than I am. I find it interesting that you feel easily overstimulated in groups (for me, it's when I'm around any more than one person at a time). I've never seen this before in a 7w8.
    Yeah, I said I relate to almost everything you posted.

    The to-do lists and the overstimulation were the two things I didn't relate to as much.

    Sorry, I forgot to mention the overstimulation.

    I generally enjoy groups, but in a sense, I do get overstimulated if there's too much conflict or debate though.
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  5. #5
    HUZZAH! Bougal's Avatar
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    I'd say eNFj.


    Ne > Ni > Ti > Fi > Te> Fe > Se > Si

  6. #6
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    i wish there was more discussion about enneagram here...i don't feel like i have that much info on it.

    to do lists make me mad...i feel pressured and even less inspired to do them once they're on a list...totally ridiculous...i realize.

    but yeah...i don't always feeel like extraverting...like when i'm tired....it's hard if your job demands it...like mine kinda does.

    sounds like you could be an enfp though...since the structure is just at work really.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  7. #7
    Dreaming the life onemoretime's Avatar
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    ENFJ. You like building up social groups (Fe) and maintain openness to possibilities (Ni).

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by onemoretime View Post
    ENFJ. You like building up social groups (Fe) and maintain openness to possibilities (Ni).
    Hi,

    Thanks (and thanks to others) for replying.

    It's true that I enjoy facilitating groups, but not building them up. Like, I'd never want to be a team leader at an organization. I don't even work in an organization formally, so I don't have to be part of the group. Does that make a difference to your answer?

  9. #9
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    Here we go.....

    A quote from "Personality Type:An Owner's Manual", by Lenore Thompson:
    Extraverted Perceivers use Extraverted Sensation or Extraverted Intuition most of the time, which moves them to react immediately to external stimulation............

    .....Accordingly, these types can find it difficult to defend themselves against overstimulation or depletion. They adapt to reality by participating fully in whatever turns up, and they'll invest as much time, energy, and attention as they have--until it runs out.......

    Apparently, ENFPs can be easily overstimulated.

    So, even if you find yourself being easily overstimulated, you may still be an ENFP.
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    IT'S BEEN FUN.

    TAKE CARE.

    PEACE OUT!!!


  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wonkavision View Post
    Here we go.....

    A quote from "Personality Type:An Owner's Manual", by Lenore Thompson:



    Apparently, ENFPs can be easily overstimulated.

    So, even if you find yourself being easily overstimulated, you may still be an ENFP.
    Well, I don't participate fully in whatever turns up, but I didn't realize that ENFPs could get overstimulated easily. Now I'm totally confused! My mother is a 7w8 and she's got such a high tolerance for group interactions and activities, it's amazing. She thrives on them. Maybe I'm comparing myself to her too much; I don't know. Anyway, thanks. This is actually very interesting.

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