User Tag List

12 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 12

  1. #1
    Member Split_Infinitive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    5
    Posts
    39

    Default Please help me type this person!

    This is a person I used to know, though we lost contact five years ago. I used to think I knew his type, but I often think it doesnít really quite fit. I think he was emotionally not very healthy, which clouds my vision about his type. Lately Iíve been wondering about his type again, and was hoping you guys could share some of your insights! Iíll describe his character without paying attention to specific factors that are indicative of type, just giving the whole picture.

    When you first meet him, he is the most charming person you could ever hope to meet. One on one he is talkative and funny and engaging and entertaining. Similarly, he is generally the centre of attention in a group, always being the one with the stories and the jokes, trying to get people to laugh. His sense of humour is important to him; he always presents himself as the funny man.

    Heís mostly worked in recruitment or advertising, loving his job not for the prestige or the money, but really just thoroughly enjoys doing it. He also loves the outdoor life (climbing, canyoning, caving) and he is a gifted pianist. Heís terrible with money, it just seems to evaporate around him. He loves his gadgets and boy toys (phones, PDAís, playstation, motorbikes), but he is incredibly careless with them, always leaving his state of the art cell phones in his pockets when going canyoning (the number heís drowned!), and once even accidentally throwing his wallet with PDA on a bonfire. No wonder heís always broke. In addition, he is very prone to substance abuse and peer pressure in that respect.

    Having said all of this, scratch beneath the surface and he isnít nearly as confident as he portrays himself to be. His funny man act is a front to stop people from getting too close, as he is very insecure about many things. His confidence and ego can take very big knocks very easily, and when that happens he withdraws inside himself completely, often needing to isolate himself from people for a while, until he can come out and present his outgoing, entertaining front again. Heís prone to depression. However, if he had to be without human contact for more than a day he would either get more depressed or really restless.

    Now getting to the crux of the matter. When I knew him he had not been single for one day since the age of 16 (so for about 14 years), though none of his relationships lasted beyond 18 months. In fact, his relationships always overlapped: he would cheat on one girl with the next. At the age of 27 he had been engaged three times. Many of his girlfriends were obviously emotionally needy Ė battling with depression, eating disorders etc. And he would present himself to them, quite convincingly, as everything they needed. He had this uncanny knack of figuring out what someone needed and then catering to that need. As a result, the girls always pursued him rather than vice versa. He did manage to help them overcome their psychological problems, though.

    But he was entirely emotionally unavailable. You could never really connect with him. The pattern of his relationships was always the same: he met a needy girl, show her he was everything they needed but never making himself emotionally available. Then the girl would get even more emotionally dependent on him, as she was always presented with the ideal, it was always just within reach... but never getting it. I have seen several of his girlfriends become emotional shells during their relationship with him. The girl he was engaged to when I first met him couldnít do anything without asking his help. I couldnít believe someone as smart and charming as he could be with a girl that clueless. Yet 5 years after they separated she got a university degree summa cum laude and was pursued by several top notch universities to come and do a PhD with them.

    But no matter how unhealthy his relationships became, he would be completely oblivious to this fact and he would keep believing that this girl really was the one and telling her so and even getting engaged (youíd know the relationship was in really bad shape once he got engaged)Ö until he would wake up one morning and realise that he was terribly unhappy, that he was in an unhealthy relationship with someone who was needier than he was willing to provide for, blame the girl for this entirely, and drop her like a brick. Then he would start again from scratch, quite radically, with a new needy lady, transforming himself into everything she needed, in a new town (sometimes country) and a new job. This could be so extreme that between two girlfriends I have seen him change from a red meat eating, motorbike riding advertising agent with a fondness for designer clothes, to a vegetarian outdoor sports instructor who would only wear environmentally friendly attire. And each time he truly believed that this was the real him.

    Not a pretty picture, is it! So, whaddaya reckon?

    (sorry, I know I am verbose... if he'd read this he'd know it was about him, and that I wrote it... we had many discussions on the subject (though he vehemently disagreed, of course))
    If Split_Infinitive absorbs all the cr*p, where does it go?
    a) Away
    b) Into Split_Infinitive

    Correct answer: b. Percentage of people who answer a: 95.

  2. #2
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,128

    Default

    Really, really unhealthy ISFP?

  3. #3
    Alexander the Terrible yenom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    1,755

    Default

    He seems like an EP to me. But could be an SP variant. Does ghe live buy the moment or live for the future?
    The fear of poverty turns people into slaves of money.

    "In this Caesar there are many Mariuses"~Sulla

    Conquer your inner demons first before you conquer the world.

  4. #4
    Member Split_Infinitive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    5
    Posts
    39

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by cloud View Post
    He seems like an EP to me. But could be an SP variant. Does ghe live buy the moment or live for the future?
    Yeah, I had narrowed it down to SP too, but I keep changing my mind on I/E and T/F!

    I think that while he would believe himself that he is living for the future, he is actually living for the moment. But it's hard to say. Future for him is such an abstract, fantastic thing - it's always based on the character he's playing today. But it can change in a heartbeat.
    If Split_Infinitive absorbs all the cr*p, where does it go?
    a) Away
    b) Into Split_Infinitive

    Correct answer: b. Percentage of people who answer a: 95.

  5. #5
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    1,128

    Default

    I just reread the description -- I think he's an E now. Likely ESFP.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Azseroffs's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    ENTj
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Socionics
    ENTj
    Posts
    417

    Default

    ESTP I think it's a prime example
    That F sense you get is from his very observant Se and manipulative Fe

    I don't have much backing for this but I think ESTPs can often be depressed because they have little sense of inner self. Being dom Se and having weak F mean that hes always living in the moment and neglecting himself.
    ENTJ LIE
    3w4 sp/sx
    3w4(4w5)-5w6(6w7)-9w8(1w9)

  7. #7
    Senior Member NewEra's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    I
    Posts
    3,104

    Default

    Everything screams ESFP to me.

  8. #8
    Member Split_Infinitive's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    5
    Posts
    39

    Default

    When I first got into MBTI and read Keirsey's book, Keirsey's description of ESTP just rang frightningly true for this guy. Keirsey I find is quite direct and not particularly nuanced in his type descriptions, which is great when you're just learning about it as it makes things very easy to remember. Except of course that when you start learning more about it, you realise that there is more to ESTPs than just being able to sell sand in the Sahara, or that ISTPs aren't just "the guy with the toolbelt" (My ISTP friend really is ISTP but there is virtually nothing about her in Keirsey's description of the type). Anyway, so my first impression of this guy was a typical Keirsey ESTP, as this guy really could sell sand in the Sahara, and he is even so good at it that he is always selling himself stories and believing them too. So it's nice to see that you guys agree with me on the ESXP part. It's just the fact that he is so easily hurt and then needs to isolate himself that made me doubt my initial diagnosis
    If Split_Infinitive absorbs all the cr*p, where does it go?
    a) Away
    b) Into Split_Infinitive

    Correct answer: b. Percentage of people who answer a: 95.

  9. #9
    Alexander the Terrible yenom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Posts
    1,755

    Default

    sell sand in sahara, how do you do this? are EPs naturally good sellers?
    The fear of poverty turns people into slaves of money.

    "In this Caesar there are many Mariuses"~Sulla

    Conquer your inner demons first before you conquer the world.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Azseroffs's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    ENTj
    Enneagram
    5w4
    Socionics
    ENTj
    Posts
    417

    Default

    I think it's more of an ESxP probably more ESTP.
    ESP being energetic and very observant of facial queues and such, and T being unsympathetic enough to sucker someone into buying something they don't need. That convincing detailed sensor talk couldn't hurt either.
    ENTJ LIE
    3w4 sp/sx
    3w4(4w5)-5w6(6w7)-9w8(1w9)

Similar Threads

  1. Please help me type this person
    By geedoenfj in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 8
    Last Post: 01-02-2016, 11:07 PM
  2. Please help me "type" this person
    By Myshkin14 in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 12-01-2014, 12:14 AM
  3. help me type this person, please?
    By heart in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 03-06-2013, 02:04 PM
  4. Help me type this person please
    By Miss in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 04-26-2012, 05:09 AM
  5. Please help me type this girl...
    By LindseyLadybug in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 02-21-2009, 01:08 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO